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the present instance I have no sympathy … at least no pity … for him
who descends。 He is that monstrum horrendum; an unprincipled man of
genius。 I confess; however; that I should like very well to know the
precise character of his thoughts; when; being defied by her whom the
Prefect terms 'a certain personage' he is reduced to opening the
letter which I left for him in the card…rack。〃

〃How? did you put any thing particular in it?〃

〃Why … it did not seem altogether right to leave the interior blank …
that would have been insulting。 D; at Vienna once; did me an evil
turn; which I told him; quite good…humoredly; that I should remember。
So; as I knew he would feel some curiosity in regard to the identity
of the person who had outwitted him; I thought it a pity not to give
him a clue。 He is well acquainted with my MS。; and I just copied into
the middle of the blank sheet the words …

〃 '  Un dessein si funeste; S'il n'est digne d'Atr閑; est digne
de Thyeste。

They are to be found in Crebillon's 'Atr閑。' 〃

~~~ End of Text ~~~



THE THOUSAND…AND…SECOND TALE OF SCHEHERAZADE

                     Truth is stranger than fiction。

                              OLD SAYING。

HAVING had occasion; lately; in the course of some Oriental
investigations; to consult the Tellmenow Isitsoornot; a work which
(like the Zohar of Simeon Jochaides) is scarcely known at all; even
in Europe; and which has never been quoted; to my knowledge; by any
American  if we except; perhaps; the author of the 〃Curiosities of
American Literature〃;  having had occasion; I say; to turn over
some pages of the first  mentioned very remarkable work; I was not
a little astonished to discover that the literary world has hitherto
been strangely in error respecting the fate of the vizier's daughter;
Scheherazade; as that fate is depicted in the 〃Arabian Nights〃; and
that the denouement there given; if not altogether inaccurate; as far
as it goes; is at least to blame in not having gone very much
farther。

For full information on this interesting topic; I must refer the
inquisitive reader to the 〃Isitsoornot〃 itself; but in the meantime;
I shall be pardoned for giving a summary of what I there discovered。

It will be remembered; that; in the usual version of the tales; a
certain monarch having good cause to be jealous of his queen; not
only puts her to death; but makes a vow; by his beard and the
prophet; to espouse each night the most beautiful maiden in his
dominions; and the next morning to deliver her up to the executioner。

Having fulfilled this vow for many years to the letter; and with a
religious punctuality and method that conferred great credit upon him
as a man of devout feeling and excellent sense; he was interrupted
one afternoon (no doubt at his prayers) by a visit from his grand
vizier; to whose daughter; it appears; there had occurred an idea。

Her name was Scheherazade; and her idea was; that she would either
redeem the land from the depopulating tax upon its beauty; or perish;
after the approved fashion of all heroines; in the attempt。

Accordingly; and although we do not find it to be leap…year (which
makes the sacrifice more meritorious); she deputes her father; the
grand vizier; to make an offer to the king of her hand。 This hand the
king eagerly accepts  (he had intended to take it at all events;
and had put off the matter from day to day; only through fear of the
vizier);  but; in accepting it now; he gives all parties very
distinctly to understand; that; grand vizier or no grand vizier; he
has not the slightest design of giving up one iota of his vow or of
his privileges。 When; therefore; the fair Scheherazade insisted upon
marrying the king; and did actually marry him despite her father's
excellent advice not to do any thing of the kind  when she would
and did marry him; I say; will I; nill I; it was with her beautiful
black eyes as thoroughly open as the nature of the case would allow。

It seems; however; that this politic damsel (who had been reading
Machiavelli; beyond doubt); had a very ingenious little plot in her
mind。 On the night of the wedding; she contrived; upon I forget what
specious pretence; to have her sister occupy a couch sufficiently
near that of the royal pair to admit of easy conversation from bed to
bed; and; a little before cock…crowing; she took care to awaken the
good monarch; her husband (who bore her none the worse will because
he intended to wring her neck on the morrow);  she managed to
awaken him; I say; (although on account of a capital conscience and
an easy digestion; he slept well) by the profound interest of a story
(about a rat and a black cat; I think) which she was narrating (all
in an undertone; of course) to her sister。 When the day broke; it so
happened that this history was not altogether finished; and that
Scheherazade; in the nature of things could not finish it just then;
since it was high time for her to get up and be bowstrung  a thing
very little more pleasant than hanging; only a trifle more genteel。

The king's curiosity; however; prevailing; I am sorry to say; even
over his sound religious principles; induced him for this once to
postpone the fulfilment of his vow until next morning; for the
purpose and with the hope of hearing that night how it fared in the
end with the black cat (a black cat; I think it was) and the rat。

The night having arrived; however; the lady Scheherazade not only put
the finishing stroke to the black cat and the rat (the rat was blue)
but before she well knew what she was about; found herself deep in
the intricacies of a narration; having reference (if I am not
altogether mistaken) to a pink horse (with green wings) that went; in
a violent manner; by clockwork; and was wound up with an indigo key。
With this history the king was even more profoundly interested than
with the other  and; as the day broke before its conclusion
(notwithstanding all the queen's endeavors to get through with it in
time for the bowstringing); there was again no resource but to
postpone that ceremony as before; for twenty…four hours。 The next
night there happened a similar accident with a similar result; and
then the next  and then again the next; so that; in the end; the
good monarch; having been unavoidably deprived of all opportunity to
keep his vow during a period of no less than one thousand and one
nights; either forgets it altogether by the expiration of this time;
or gets himself absolved of it in the regular way; or (what is more
probable) breaks it outright; as well as the head of his father
confessor。 At all events; Scheherazade; who; being lineally descended
from Eve; fell heir; perhaps; to the whole seven baskets of talk;
which the latter lady; we all know; picked up from under the trees in
the garden of Eden…Scheherazade; I say; finally triumphed; and the
tariff upon beauty was repealed。

Now; this conclusion (which is that of the story as we have it upon
record) is; no doubt; excessively proper and pleasant  but alas!
like a great many pleasant things; is more pleasant than true; and I
am indebted altogether to the 〃Isitsoornot〃 for the means of
correcting the error。 〃Le mieux;〃 says a French proverb; 〃est
l'ennemi du bien;〃 and; in mentioning that Scheherazade had inherited
the seven baskets of talk; I should have added that she put them out
at compound interest until they amounted to seventy…seven。

〃My dear sister;〃 said she; on the thousand…and…second night; (I
quote the language of the 〃Isitsoornot〃 at this point; verbatim) 〃my
dear sister;〃 said she; 〃now that all this little difficulty about
the bowstring has blown over; and that this odious tax is so happily
repealed; I feel that I have been guilty of great indiscretion in
withholding from you and the king (who I am sorry to say; snores  a
thing no gentleman would do) the full conclusion of Sinbad the
sailor。 This person went through numerous other and more interesting
adventures than those which I related; but the truth is; I felt
sleepy on the particular night of their narration; and so was seduced
into cutting them short  a grievous piece of misconduct; for which
I only trust that Allah will forgive me。 But even yet it is not too
late to remedy my great neglect  and as soon as I have given the
king a pinch or two in order to wake him up so far that he may stop
making that horrible noise; I will forthwith entertain you (and him
if he pleases) with the sequel of this very remarkable story。

Hereupon the sister of Scheherazade; as I have it from the
〃Isitsoornot;〃 expressed no very particular intensity of
gratification; but the king; having been sufficiently pinched; at
length ceased snoring; and finally said; 〃hum!〃 and then 〃hoo!〃 when
the queen; understanding these words (which are no doubt Arabic) to
signify that he was all attention; and would do his best not to snore
any more  the queen; I say; having arranged these matters to her
satisfaction; re…entered thus; at once; into the history of Sinbad
the sailor:

〃'At length; in my old age; 'these are the words of Sinbad himself;
as retailed by Scheherazade'  'at length; in my old age; and after
enjoying many years of tranquillity at home; I became once more
possessed of a desire of visiting foreign countries; and one day;
without acquainting any of my family with my design; I packed up some
bundles of such merchandise as was most precious and least bulky;
and; engaged a porter to carry them; went with him down to the
sea…shore; to await the arrival of any chance vessel that might
convey me out of the kingdom into some region which I had not as yet
explored。

〃'Having deposited the packages upon the sands; we sat down beneath
some trees; and looked out into the ocean in the hope of perceiving a
ship; but during several hours we saw none whatever。 At length I
fancied that I could hear a singular buzzing or humming sound; and
the porter; after listening awhile; declared that he also could
distinguish it。 Presently it grew louder; and then still louder; so
that we could have no doubt that the object which caused it was
approaching us。 At length; on the edge of the horizon; we discovered
a black speck; which rapidly

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