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     ;I'd   have   taken   a   reef   in   the   blessed   stove´pipe�察─  �said   the   Admiral�察�

gazing   ruefully   at   the   smashed   chimney�察   �if   I   had   known   as   how   the 

Flagship was agoin' to be under fire。; 

     The next day he rigged out an iron funnel�察�which�察�being in sections�察�

could be detached and taken in at a moment's notice。 On the whole�察�I think 

he   was   resigned   to   the   demolition   of   his   brick   chimney。  The   stove´pipe 

was a great deal more shipshape。 

     The   town   was   not   so   easily   appeased。   The   selectmen   determined   to 

make an example of the guilty parties�察�and offered a reward for their arrest�察�

holding   out   a   promise   of   pardon   to   anyone   of   the   offenders   who   would 

furnish information against the rest。 But there were no faint hearts among 

the   Centipedes。   Suspicion   rested   for   a   while   on   several   persons´on   the 

soldiers at the fort�察�on a crazy fellow�察�known about town as ;BottleNose;�察�

and at last on Sailor Ben。 

     ;Shiver   my   timbers� ─  �cries   that   deeply   injured   individual。   ;Do   you 

suppose�察�sir�察�as I have lived to sixty year�察�an' ain't got no more sense than 

to   go   for   to   blaze   away   at   my   own   upper   riggin'�拭  �It   doesn't   stand   to 

reason。; 

     It certainly did not seem probable that Mr。 Watson would maliciously 

knock over his own chimney�察 �and   Lawyer Hackett�察 �who   had the   case   in 

hand�察�'bowed himself out of the Admiral's cabin convinced that the right 

man had not been discovered。 



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     People living by the sea are always more or less superstitious。 Stories 

of   spectre   ships   and   mysterious   beacons�察  �that   lure   vessels   out   of   their 

course and wreck them on unknown reefs�察�were among the stock legends 

of Rivermouth�察�and not a few people in the town were ready to attribute 

the    firing   of   those   guns    to   some     supernatural     agency。     The    Oldest 

Inhabitant   remembered   that   when   he   was   a   boy   a   dim´looking   sort   of 

schooner hove to in the offing one foggy afternoon�察�fired off a single gun 

that didn't make any report�察�and then crumbled to nothing�察�spar�察�mast�察�and 

hulk�察�like a piece of burnt paper。 

     The authorities�察 �however�察�were  of the opinion that human hands had 

something       to  do   with   the   explosions�察    �and   they   resorted    to  deep´laid 

stratagems to get hold of the said hands。 One of their traps came very near 

catching   us。 They  artfully  caused   an   old   brass   fieldpiece   to   be   left   on   a 

wharf near the scene of our late operations。 Nothing in the world but the 

lack of money to buy powder saved us from falling into the clutches of the 

two watchmen who lay secreted for a week in a neighboring sail´loft。 

     It was many a day before the midnight bombardment ceased to be the 

town´talk。 The trick was so audacious and on so grand a scale that nobody 

thought   for   an   instant   of   connecting   us   lads   with   it。   Suspicion   at   length 

grew   weary   of   lighting   on   the   wrong   person�察  �and   as   conjecture´like   the 

physicians in the epitaph´was in vain�察�the Rivermouthians gave up the idea 

of finding out who had astonished them。 

     They never did find out�察�and never will�察�unless they read this veracious 

history。 If the selectmen are still disposed to punish the malefactors�察�I can 

supply      Lawyer      Hackett     with    evidence      enough      to   convict    Pepper 

Whitcomb�察       �Phil   Adams�察     �Charley     Marden�察     �and    the   other   honorable 

members of the Centipede Club。 But really I don't think it would pay now。 



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                       CHAPTER Eighteen 



                           A Frog He Would A´Wooing Go 



     If the reader supposes that I lived all this while in Rivermouth without 

falling a victim to one or more of the young ladies attending Miss Dorothy 

Gibbs's Female Institute�察�why�察�then�察�all I have to say is the reader exhibits 

his ignorance of human nature。 

     Miss Gibbs's seminary was located within a few minutes' walk of the 

Temple      Grammar      School�察   �and   numbered      about   thirty´five   pupils�察  �the 

majority   of   whom   boarded   at   the   Hall´Primrose   Hall�察  �as   Miss   Dorothy 

prettily 20called it。 The Prim´roses�察�as we called them�察�ranged from seven 

years of age to sweet seventeen�察�and a prettier group of sirens never got 

together even in Rivermouth�察�for Rivermouth�察�you should know�察�is famous 

for its pretty girls。 

     There were tall girls and short girls�察�rosy girls and pale girls�察�and girls 

as brown as berries�察�girls like Amazons�察�slender girls�察�weird and winning 

like Undine�察�girls with black tresses�察�girls with auburn ringlets�察�girls with 

every   tinge   of   golden   hair。  To   behold   Miss   Dorothy's   young   ladies   of   a 

Sunday  morning walking to church two by two�察�the smallest toddling at 

the end of the procession�察�like the bobs at the tail of a kite�察�was a spectacle 

to fill with tender emotion the least susceptible heart。 To see Miss Dorothy 

marching      grimly    at  the   head   of   her   light  infantry�察  �was   to   feel  the 

hopelessness of making an attack on any part of the column。 

     She was a perfect dragon of watchfulness。 The most unguarded lifting 

of   an   eyelash   in   the   fluttering   battalion   was   sufficient   to   put   her   on   the 

lookout。 She had had experiences with the male sex�察�this Miss Dorothy so 

prim   and   grim。   It   was   whispered   that   her   heart   was   a   tattered   album 

scrawled over with love´lines�察 �but that she had   shut up the volume   long 

ago。 

     There was a tradition that she had been crossed in love�察�but it was the 

faintest of traditions。 A gay  young lieutenant of marines had flirted with 

her at a country ball ��A。D。 1811���察�and then marched carelessly away at the 

head of his company to the shrill music of the fife�察�without so much as a 



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sigh for the girl he left behind him。 The years rolled on�察�the gallant gay 

Lothario´which       wasn't    his  name´married�察     �became     a  father�察 �and   then  a 

grandfather�察�and at the period of which I am speaking his grandchild was 

actually one of Miss Dorothy's young ladies。 So�察�at least�察�ran the story。 

     The lieutenant himself was dead these many years�察�but Miss Dorothy 

never   got   over   his   duplicity。   She   was   convinced     that   the   sole   aim   of 

mankind was to win the unguarded affection of maidens�察�and then march 

off treacherously with flying colors to the heartless music of the drum and 

fife。 To shield the inmates of Primrose Hall from the bitter influences that 

had blighted her own early affections was Miss Dorothy's mission in life。 

     ;No wolves prowling about my lambs�察�if you please�察─�said 

     Miss Dorothy。 ;I will not allow it。; 

     She was as good as her word。 I don't think the boy lives who ever set 

foot within the limits of Primrose Hall while the seminary was under her 

charge。 Perhaps if Miss Dorothy had given her young ladies a little more 

liberty�察�they would not have thought it ;such fun; to make eyes over the 

white lattice fence at the young gentlemen of the Temple Grammar School。 

I say perhaps�察�for it is one thing to manage thirty´five young ladies   and 

quite another thing to talk about it。 

     But   all   Miss   Dorothy's   vigilance   could   not   prevent   the   young   folks 

from meeting in the town now and then�察�nor could her utmost ingenuity 

interrupt postal arrangements。 There was no end of notes passing between 

the students and the Primroses。 Notes tied to the heads of arrows were shot 

into dormitory  windows�察  �notes   were   tucked under   fences�察 �and hidden   in 

the trunks of decayed trees。 Every thick place in the boxwood hedge that 

surrounded the seminary was a possible post´office。 

     It was a terrible shock to Miss Dorothy the day she unearthed a nest of 

letters in one of the huge wooden urns surmounting the gateway that led to 

her dovecot。 It was a bitter moment to Miss Phoebe and Miss Candace and 

Miss Hesba�察�when they had their locks of hair grimly handed back to them 

by Miss Gibbs in the presence of the whole school。 Girls whose locks of 

hair   had    run  the   blockade    in   safety  were    particularly    severe   on   the 

offenders。 But it didn't stop other notes and other tresses�察�and I would like 

to know what can stop them while the earth holds together。 



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     Now   when   I   first   came   to   Rivermouth   I   looked   upon   girls   as   rather 

tame company�察�I hadn't a spark of sentiment concerning them�察�but seeing 

my  comrades   sending   and   receiving   mysterious   epistles�察  �wearing   bits   of 

ribbon     in   their   button´holes     and    leaving    packages      of   confectionery 

��generally lemon´drops�� in the hollow trunks of trees´why�察�I felt that this 

was the proper thing to do。 I resolved�察�as a matter of duty�察�to fall in love 

with somebody�察�and I didn't care in the least who it was。 In much the same 

mood that Don Quixote selected the Dulcinea del Toboso for his lady´love�察�

I singled out one of Miss Dorothy's incomparable young ladies for mine。 

     I   debated   a   long   while   whether   I   should   not   select   two�察  �but   at   last 

settled down on o

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