the story of a pioneer-第3部分

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which　my　mother　promptly　suppressed　by　sending

me　to　bed。　　No　doubt　she　questioned　my　youthful

discretion；　for　she　almost　convinced　me　that　I　had

seen　nothing　at　allalmost；　but　not　quite；　and　she

wisely　kept　me　close　to　her　for　several　days；　until

the　escaped　slave　my　father　was　hiding　was　safely

out　of　the　house　and　away。　　Discovery　of　this　seri…

ous　offense　might　have　borne　grave　results　for　him。



It　was　in　Lawrence；　too；　that　I　received　and　spent

my　first　twenty…five　cents。　　I　used　an　entire　day　in

doing　this；　and　the　occasion　was　one　of　the　most

delightful　and　memorable　of　my　life。　　It　was　the

Fourth　of　July；　and　I　was　dressed　in　white　and　rode

in　a　procession。　　My　sister　Mary；　who　also　graced

the　procession；　had　also　been　given　twenty…five

cents；　and　during　the　parade；　when；　for　obvious

reasons；　we　were　unable　to　break　ranks　and　spend

our　wealth；　the　consciousness　of　it　lay　heavily　upon

us。　　When　we　finally　began　our　shopping　the　first

place　we　visited　was　a　candy　store；　and　I　recall　dis…

tinctly　that　we　forced　the　weary　proprietor　to　take

down　and　show　us　every　jar　in　the　place　before　we

spent　one　penny。　　The　first　banana　I　ever　ate　was

purchased　that　day；　and　I　hesitated　over　it　a　long

time。　　Its　cost　was　five　cents；　and　in　view　of　that

large　expenditure；　the　eating　of　the　fruit；　I　was

afraid；　would　be　too　brief　a　joy。　　I　bought　it；　how…

ever；　and　the　experience　developed　into　a　tragedy；

for；　not　knowing　enough　to　peel　the　banana；　I　bit

through　skin　and　pulp　alike；　as　if　I　were　eating　an

apple；　and　then　burst　into　ears　of　disappointment。　

The　beautiful　conduct　of　my　sister　Mary　shines

down　through　the　years。　　She；　wise　child；　had

taken　no　chances　with　the　unknown；　but　now；

moved　by　my　despair；　she　bought　half　of　my　banana；

and　we　divided　the　fruit；　the　loss；　and　the　lesson。　

Fate；　moreover；　had　another　turn　of　the　screw　for

us；　for；　after　Mary　had　taken　a　bite　of　it；　we　gave

what　was　left　of　the　banana　to　a　boy　who　stood　near

us　and　who　knew　how　to　eat　it；　and　not　even　the

large　amount　of　candy　in　our　sticky　hands　enabled

us　to　regard　with　calmness　the　subsequent　happiness

of　that　little　boy。



Another　experience　with　fruit　in　Lawrence　illus…

trates　the　ideas　of　my　mother　and　the　character　of

the　training　she　gave　her　children。　　Our　neighbors；

the　Cabots；　were　one　day　giving　a　great　garden　party；

and　my　sister　was　helping　to　pick　strawberries　for

the　occasion。　　When　I　was　going　home　from　school

I　passed　the　berry…patches　and　stopped　to　speak　to

my　sister；　who　at　once　presented　me　with　two　straw…

berries。　　She　said　Mrs。　Cabot　had　told　her　to　eat

all　she　wanted；　but　that　she　would　eat　two　less　than

she　wanted　and　give　those　two　to　me。　　To　my

mind；　the　suggestion　was　generous　and　proper；　in

my　life　strawberries　were　rare。　　I　ate　one　berry；

and　then；　overcome　by　an　ambition　to　be　generous

also；　took　the　other　berry　home　to　my　mother；　tell…

ing　her　how　I　had　got　it。　　To　my　chagrin；　mother

was　deeply　shocked。　　She　told　me　that　the　trans…

action　was　all　wrong；　and　she　made　me　take　back

the　berry　and　explain　the　matter　to　Mrs。　Cabot。　

By　the　time　I　reached　that　generous　lady　the　berry

was　the　worse　for　its　journey；　and　so　was　I。　　I　was

only　nine　years　old　and　very　sensitive。　　It　was　clear

to　me　that　I　could　hardly　live　through　the　humilia…

tion　of　the　confession；　and　it　was　indeed　a　bitter

experience　the　worst；　I　think；　in　my　young　life；

though　Mrs。　Cabot　was　both　sympathetic　and

understanding。　　She　kissed　me；　and　sent　a　quart

of　strawberries　to　my　mother；　but　for　a　long　time

afterward　I　could　not　meet　her　kind　eyes；　for　I　be…

lieved　that　in　her　heart　she　thought　me　a　thief。



My　second　friendship；　and　one　which　had　a　strong

influence　on　my　after…life；　was　formed　in　Lawrence。　

I　was　not　more　than　ten　years　old　when　I　met　this

new　friend；　but　the　memory　of　her　in　after…years；

and　the　impression　she　had　made　on　my　susceptible

young　mind；　led　me　first　into　the　ministry；　next　into

medicine；　and　finally　into　suffrage…work。　　Living

next　door　to　us；　on　Prospect　Hill；　was　a　beautiful

and　mysterious　woman。　　All　we　children　knew　of

her　was　that　she　was　a　vivid　and　romantic　figure；

who　seemed　to　have　no　friends　and　of　whom　our

elders　spoke　in　whispers　or　not　at　all。　　To　me　she

was　a　princess　in　a　fairy…tale；　for　she　rode　a　white

horse　and　wore　a　blue　velvet　riding…habit　with　a

blue　velvet　hat　and　a　picturesquely　drooping　white

plume。　　I　soon　learned　at　what　hours　she　went

forth　to　ride；　and　I　used　to　hover　around　our　gate

for　the　joy　of　seeing　her　mount　and　gallop　away。　

I　realized　that　there　was　something　unusual　about

her　house；　and　I　had　an　idea　that　the　prince　was

waiting　for　her　somewhere　in　the　far　distance；　and

that　for　the　time　at　least　she　had　escaped　the　ogre

in　the　castle　she　left　behind。　　I　was　wrong　about

the　prince；　but　right　about　the　ogre。　　It　was　only

when　my　unhappy　lady　left　her　castle　that　she　was

free。



Very　soon　she　noticed　me。　　Possibly　she　saw　the

adoration　in　my　childish　eyes。　　She　began　to　nod

and　smile　at　me；　and　then　to　speak　to　me；　but　at

first　I　was　almost　afraid　to　answer　her。　　There　were

stories　now　among　the　children　that　the　house　was

haunted；　and　that　by　night　a　ghost　walked　there　and

in　the　grounds。　　I　felt　an　extraordinary　interest　in

the　ghost；　and　I　spent　hours　peering　through　our

picket　fence；　trying　to　catch　a　glimpse　of　it；　but　I

hesitated　to　be　on　terms　of　neighborly　intimacy　with

one　who　dwelt　with　ghosts。



One　day　the　mysterious　lady　bent　and　kissed　me。　

Then；　straightening　up；　she　looked　at　me　queerly

and　said：　　‘‘Go　and　tell　your　mother　I　did　that。''　

There　was　something　very　compelling　in　her　manner。　

I　knew　at　once　that　I　must　tell　my　mother　what　she

had　done；　and　I　ran　into　our　house　and　did　so。　

While　my　mother　was　considering　the　problem　the

situation　presented；　for　she　knew　the　character　of

the　house　next　door；　a　note　was　handed　in　to　her

a　very　pathetic　little　note　from　my　mysterious　lady；

asking　my　mother　to　let　me　come　and　see　her。　　Long

afterward　mother　showed　it　to　me。　　It　ended　with

the　words：　　‘‘She　will　see　no　one　but　me。　　No　harm

shall　come　to　her。　　Trust　me。''



That　night　my　parents　talked　the　matter　over　and

decided　to　let　me　go。　　Probably　they　felt　that　the

slave　next　door　was　as　much　to　be　pitied　as　the　es…

caped…negro　slaves　they　so　often　harbored　in　our

home。　　I　made　my　visit；　which　was　the　first　of　many；

and　a　strange　friendship　began　and　developed　be…

tween　the　woman　of　the　town　and　the　little　girl　she

loved。　　Some　of　those　visits　I　remember　as　vividly

as　if　I　had　made　them　yesterday。　　There　was　never

the　slightest　suggestion　during　any　of　them　of　things

I　should　not　see　or　hear；　for　while　I　was　with　her

my　hostess　became　a　child　again；　and　we　played

together　like　children。　　She　had　wonderful　toys　for

me；　and　pictures　and　books；　but　the　thing　I　loved

best　of　all　and　played　with　for　hours　was　a　little

stuffed　hen　which　she　told　me　had　been　her　dearest

treasure　when　she　was　a　child　at　home。　　She　had

also　a　stuffed　puppy；　and　she　once　mentioned　that

those　two　things　alone　were　left　of　her　life　as

a　little　girl。　　Besides　the　toys　and　books　and　pic…

tures；　she　gave　me　ice…cream　and　cake；　and　told　me

fairy…tales。　　She　had　a　wonderful　understanding　of

what　a　child　likes。　　There　were　half　a　dozen　women

in　the　house　with　her；　but　I　saw　none　of　them　nor

any　of　the　men　who　came。



Once；　when　we　had　become　very　good　friends

indeed　and　my　early　shyness　had　departed；　I

found　courage　to　ask　her　where　the　ghost　was

the　ghost　that　haunted　her　house。　　I　can　still　see

the　look　in　her　eyes　as　they　met　mine。　　She　told

me　the　ghost　lived　in　her　heart；　and　that　she　did

not　like　to　talk　about　it；　and　that　we　must　not

speak　of　it　again。　　After　that　I　never　mentioned　it；

but　I　was　more　deeply　interested　than　ever；　for　a

ghost　that　lived　in　a　heart　was　a　new　kind　of　ghost

to　me　at　that　time；　though　I　have　met　many　of

them　since　then。　　During　all　our　intercourse　my

mother　never　entered　the　house　next　door；　nor　did

my　mysterious　lady　enter　our　home；　but　she　con…

stantly　sent　my　mother　secret　gifts　for　the　poor　and

the　sick　of　the　neighborhood；　and　she　was　always

the　first　to　offer　help　for　those　who　were　in　trouble。　

Many　years　afterward　mother　told　me　she　was　the

most　generous　woman　she　had　ever　known；　and

that　she　had　a　rarely　beautiful　nature。　　Our　depart…

ure　for　Michigan　broke　up　the　friendship；　but　I　have

never　forgotten　her；　and　whenever；　in　my　later

work　as　minister；　physician；　and　suffragist；　I　have

been　able　to　help　women　of　the　class　to　which　she

belonged；　I　have　mentally　offered　that　help　for　credit

in　the　tragic　ledger　of　her　life；　in　which　the　clean　and

the　blotted　pages　were　so　strange　a　contrast。



One　more　incident　of　Lawrence　I　must　describe

before　I　leave　that　city　behind　me；　as　we　left　it　for

ever　in　1859。　　While　we　were　still　there　a　number　of

Lawrence　men　decided　to　go　West；　and　amid　great

public　excitement　they　departed　in　a　body　for　Kansas；

where　they　founded　the　town　of　Lawrence　in　that

state。　　I　recall　distinctly　the　public　interest　which

attended　their　going；　and　the　feeling　every　one

seemed　to　have　that　they　were　passing　forever　out

of　the　civilized　world。　　Their　farewells　to　their

friends　were　eternal；　no　one　expected　to　see　them

again；　and　my　small　brain　grew　dizzy　as　I　tried　to

imagine　a　place　so　remote　as　their　destination。　　It

was；　I　finally　decided；　at　the　uttermost　ends　of　the

earth；　and　it　seemed　quite　possible　that　the　brave

adventurers　who　reached　it　might　then　drop　off　into

space。　　Fifty　years　later　I　was　talking　to　a　Cali…

fornia　girl　who　complained　lightly　of　the　monotony

of　a　climate　where　the　sun　shone　and　the　flowers

bloomed　all　the　year　around。　　‘‘But　I　had　a　de…

lightful