the angel and the author-第4部分

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can　always　reckon　upon　the　superior　writer　whose　temperament　will　
prompt　him　to　make　respectful　study　of　his　betters。　　A　reasonable　
supply　of　high…class　novels　might　always　have　been　depended　upon；　the　
trouble　is　that　the　public　now　demands　that　all　stories　must　be　of　
the　upper　ten　thousand。　　Auld　Robin　Grey　must　be　Sir　Robert　Grey；　
South　African　millionaire；　and　Jamie；　the　youngest　son　of　the　old　
Earl；　otherwise　a　cultured　public　can　take　no　interest　in　the　ballad。　　
A　modern　nursery　rhymester　to　succeed　would　have　to　write　of　Little　
Lord　Jack　and　Lady　Jill　ascending　one　of　the　many　beautiful　eminences　
belonging　to　the　ancestral　estates　of　their　parents；　bearing　between　
them；　on　a　silver　rod；　an　exquisitely　painted　Sevres　vase　filled　with　
ottar　of　roses。

I　take　up　my　fourpenny…halfpenny　magazine。　　The　heroine　is　a　youthful　
Duchess；　her　husband　gambles　with　thousand…pound　notes；　with　the　
result　that　they　are　reduced　to　living　on　the　first　floor　of　the　
Carlton　Hotel。　　The　villain　is　a　Russian　Prince。　　The　Baronet　of　a　
simpler　age　has　been　unable；　poor　fellow；　to　keep　pace　with　the　
times。　　What　self…respecting　heroine　would　abandon　her　husband　and　
children　for　sin　and　a　paltry　five　thousand　a　year？　　To　the　heroine　
of　the　pastto　the　clergyman's　daughter　or　the　lady　artisthe　was　
dangerous。　　The　modern　heroine　misbehaves　herself　with　nothing　below　
Cabinet　rank。

I　turn　to　something　less　pretentious；　a　weekly　periodical　that　my　
wife　tells　me　is　the　best　authority　she　has　come　across　on　blouses。　　
I　find　in　it　what　once　upon　a　time　would　have　been　called　a　farce。　　
It　is　now　a　〃drawing…room　comedietta。　　All　rights　reserved。〃　　The　
dramatis　personae　consist　of　the　Earl　of　Danbury；　the　Marquis　of　
Rottenborough　（with　a　past）；　and　an　American　heiressa　character　
that　nowadays　takes　with　lovers　of　the　simple　the　place　formerly　
occupied　by　〃Rose；　the　miller's　daughter。〃

I　sometimes　wonder；　is　it　such　teaching　as　that　of　Carlyle　and　
Tennyson　that　is　responsible　for　this　present　tendency　of　literature？　　
Carlyle　impressed　upon　us　that　the　only　history　worth　consideration　
was　the　life　of　great　men　and　women；　and　Tennyson　that　we　〃needs　must　
love　the　highest。〃　　So　literature；　striving　ever　upward；　ignores　
plain　Romola　for　the　Lady　Ponsonby　de　Tompkins；　the　provincialisms　of　
a　Charlotte　Bronte　for　what　a　certain　critic；　born　before　his　time；　
would　have　called　the　〃doin's　of　the　hupper　succles。〃

The　British　Drama　has　advanced　by　even　greater　bounds。　　It　takes　
place　now　exclusively　within　castle　walls；　andwhat　Messrs。　Lumley　&　
Co。's　circular　would　describe　as〃desirable　town　mansions；　suitable　
for　gentlemen　of　means。〃　　A　living　dramatist；　who　should　know；　tells　
us　that　drama　does　not　occur　in　the　back　parlour。　　Dramatists　have；　
it　has　been　argued；　occasionally　found　it　there；　but　such　may　have　
been　dramatists　with　eyes　capable　of　seeing　through　clothes。

I　once　wrote　a　play　which　I　read　to　a　distinguished　Manager。　　He　said　
it　was　a　most　interesting　play：　　they　always　say　that。　　I　waited；　
wondering　to　what　other　manager　he　would　recommend　me　to　take　it。　　To　
my　surprise　he　told　me　he　would　like　it　for　himselfbut　with　
alterations。

〃The　whole　thing　wants　lifting　up；〃　was　his　opinion。　　〃Your　hero　is　a　
barrister：　　my　public　take　no　interest　in　plain　barristers。　　Make　him　
the　Solicitor　General。〃

〃But　he's　got　to　be　amusing；〃　I　argued。　　〃A　Solicitor　General　is　
never　amusing。〃

My　Manager　pondered　for　a　moment。　　〃Let　him　be　Solicitor　General　for　
Ireland；〃　he　suggested。

I　made　a　note　of　it。

〃Your　heroine；〃　he　continued；　〃is　the　daughter　of　a　seaside　lodging…
house　keeper。　　My　public　do　not　recognize　seaside　lodgings。　　Why　not　
the　daughter　of　an　hotel　proprietor？　　Even　that　will　be　risky；　but　we　
might　venture　it。〃　　An　inspiration　came　to　him。　　〃Or　better　still；　
let　the　old　man　be　the　Managing　Director　of　an　hotel　Trust：　　that　
would　account　for　her　clothes。〃

Unfortunately　I　put　the　thing　aside　for　a　few　months；　and　when　I　was　
ready　again　the　public　taste　had　still　further　advanced。　　The　doors　
of　the　British　Drama　were　closed　for　the　time　being　on　all　but　
members　of　the　aristocracy；　and　I　did　not　see　my　comic　old　man　as　a　
Marquis；　which　was　the　lowest　title　that　just　then　one　dared　to　offer　
to　a　low　comedian。

Now　how　are　we　middle…class　novelists　and　dramatists　to　continue　to　
live？　　I　am　aware　of　the　obvious　retort；　but　to　us　it　absolutely　is　
necessary。　　We　know　only　parlours：　　we　call　them　drawing…rooms。　　At　
the　bottom　of　our　middle…class　hearts　we　regard　them　fondly：　　the　
folding…doors　thrown　back；　they　make　rather　a　fine　apartment。　　The　
only　drama　that　we　know　takes　place　in　such　rooms：　　the　hero　sitting　
in　the　gentleman's　easy　chair；　of　green　repp：　　the　heroine　in　the　
lady's　ditto；　without　armsthe　chair；　I　mean。　　The　scornful　glances；　
the　bitter　words　of　our　middle…class　world　are　hurled　across　these　
three…legged　loo…tables；　the　wedding…cake　ornament　under　its　glass　
case　playing　the　part　of　white　ghost。

In　these　days；　when　〃Imperial　cement〃　is　at　a　premium；　who　would　dare　
suggest　that　the　emotions　of　a　parlour　can　by　any　possibility　be　the　
same　as　those　exhibited　in　a　salon　furnished　in　the　style　of　Louis　
Quatorze；　that　the　tears　of　Bayswater　can　possibly　be　compared　for　
saltness　with　the　lachrymal　fluid　distilled　from　South　Audley　Street　
glands；　that　the　laughter　of　Clapham　can　be　as　catching　as　the　
cultured　cackle　of　Curzon　Street？　　But　we；　whose　best　clothes　are　
exhibited　only　in　parlours；　what　are　we　to　do？　　How　can　we　lay　bare　
the　souls　of　Duchesses；　explain　the　heart…throbs　of　peers　of　the　
realm？　　Some　of　my　friends　who；　being　Conservative；　attend　Primrose　
〃tourneys〃　（or　is　it　〃Courts　of　love〃？　　I　speak　as　an　outsider。　　
Something　mediaeval；　I　know　it　is）　do；　it　is　true；　occasionally　
converse　with　titled　ladies。　　But　the　period　for　conversation　is　
always　limited　owing　to　the　impatience　of　the　man　behind；　and　I　doubt　
if　the　interview　is　ever　of　much　practical　use　to　them；　as　conveying　
knowledge　of　the　workings　of　the　aristocratic　mind。　　Those　of　us　who　
are　not　Primrose　Knights　miss　even　this　poor　glimpse　into　the　world　
above　us。　　We　know　nothing；　simply　nothing；　concerning　the　deeper　
feelings　of　the　upper　ten。　　Personally；　I　once　received　a　letter　from　
an　Earl；　but　that　was　in　connection　with　a　dairy　company　of　which　his　
lordship　was　chairman；　and　spoke　only　of　his　lordship's　views　
concerning　milk　and　the　advantages　of　the　cash　system。　　Of　what　I　
really　wished　to　knowhis　lordship's　passions；　yearnings　and　general　
attitude　to　lifethe　circular　said　nothing。

Year　by　year　I　find　myself　more　and　more　in　a　minority。　　One　by　one　
my　literary　friends　enter　into　this　charmed　aristocratic　circle；　
after　which　one　hears　no　more　from　them　regarding　the　middle…classes。　　
At　once　they　set　to　work　to　describe　the　mental　sufferings　of　Grooms　
of　the　Bed…chamber；　the　hidden　emotions　of　Ladies　in　their　own　right；　
the　religious　doubts　of　Marquises。　　I　want　to　know　how　they　do　it
〃how　the　devil　they　get　there。〃　　They　refuse　to　tell　me。

Meanwhile；　I　see　nothing　before　me　but　the　workhouse。　　Year　by　year　
the　public　grows　more　impatient　of　literature　dealing　merely　with　the　
middle…classes。　　I　know　nothing　about　any　other　class。　　What　am　I　to　
do？

Commonplace　peoplefriends　of　mine　without　conscience；　counsel　me　in　
flippant　phrase　to　〃have　a　shot　at　it。〃

〃I　expect；　old　fellow；　you　know　just　as　much　about　it　as　these　other　
Johnnies　do。〃　　（I　am　not　defending　their　conversation　either　as　
regards　style　or　matter：　　I　am　merely　quoting。）　　〃And　even　if　you　
don't；　what　does　it　matter？　　The　average　reader　knows　less。　　How　is　
he　to　find　you　out？〃

But；　as　I　explain　to　them；　it　is　the　law　of　literature　never　to　write　
except　about　what　you　really　know。　　I　want　to　mix　with　the　
aristocracy；　study　them；　understand　them；　so　that　I　may　earn　my　
living　in　the　only　way　a　literary　man　nowadays　can　earn　his　living；　
namely；　by　writing　about　the　upper　circles。

I　want　to　know　how　to　get　there。



CHAPTER　IV



＇Man　and　his　Master。＇

There　is　one　thing　that　the　Anglo…Saxon　does　better　than　the　〃French；　
or　Turk；　or　Rooshian；〃　to　which　add　the　German　or　the　Belgian。　　When　
the　Anglo…Saxon　appoints　an　official；　he　appoints　a　servant：　　when　
the　others　put　a　man　in　uniform；　they　add　to　their　long　list　of　
masters。　　If　among　your　acquaintances　you　can　discover　an　American；　
or　Englishman；　unfamiliar　with　the　continental　official；　it　is　worth　
your　while　to　accompany　him；　the　first　time　he　goes　out　to　post　a　
letter；　say。　　He　advances　towards　the　post…office　a　breezy；　self…
confident　gentleman；　borne　up　by　pride　of　race。　　While　mounting　the　
steps　he　talks　airily　of　〃just　getting　this　letter　off　his　mind；　and　
then　picking　up　Jobson　and　going　on　to　Durand's　for　lunch。〃

He　talks　as　if　he　had　the　whole　day　before　him。　　At　the　top　of　the　
steps　he　attempts　to　push　open　the　door。　　It　will　not　move。　　He　looks　
about　him；　and　discovers　that　is　the　door　of　egress；　not　of　ingress。　　
It　does　not　seem　to　him　worth　while　redescending　the　twenty　steps　and　
climbing　another　twenty。　　So　far　as　he　is　concerned　he　is　willing　to　
pull　the　door；　instead　of　pushing　it。　　But　a　stern　official　bars　his　
way；　and　haughtily　indicates　the　proper　entrance。　　〃Oh；　bother；〃　he　
says；　and　down　he　trots　again；　and　up　the　other　flight。

〃I　shall　not　be　a　minute；〃　he　remarks　over　his　shoulder。　　〃You　can　
wait　for　me　outside。〃

But　if　you　know　your　way　about；　you　follow　him　in。　　There　are　seats　
within；　and　you　have　a　newspaper　in　your　pocket：　　the　time　will　pass　
more　pleasantly。　　Inside　he　looks　round；　bewildered。　　The　German　
post…office；　generally　speaking；　is　about　the　size　of　the　Bank　of　
England。　　Some　twenty　different　windows　confront　your　troubled　
friend；　each　one　bearing　its　own　particular　legend。　　Starting　with　
number　one；　he　sets　to　work　to　spell　them　out。　　It　appears　to　him　
that　the　posting　of　letters　is　not　a　thing　that　the　German　post…
office　desires　to　encourage。　　Would　he　not　like　a　dog　licence　
instead？　is　what　one　window　suggests　to　him。