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sinking his chin still further into his chest; resumed:



〃It might run another week; or it might fall down to…morrowyou never

can tell。  But I'm getting lots of letters。  Tremendous public interest。〃



〃Yes; yes;〃 assented Mr。 Lavender; 〃it's most important。〃



〃Of course; we might run yours with it;〃 said the editor。  〃But I don't

know; I think it'd kill the other。  Still〃



〃I shouldn't like〃 began Mr。 Lavender。



〃I don't believe in giving them more than they want; you know;〃 resumed

the editor。  〃I think I'll have my news editor in;〃 and he blew into a

tube。  〃Send me Mr。 Crackamup。  This thing of yours is very important;

sir。  Suppose we began to run it on Thursday。  Yes; I should think

they'll be tired of British prisoners by then。〃



〃Don't let me;〃 began Mr。 Lavender。



The editor's eye became unveiled for the Moment。  〃You'll be wanting to

take it somewhere else if weQuite!  Well; I think we could run them

together。  See here; Mr。 Crackamup〃Mr。 Lavender saw a small man like

Beethoven frowning from behind spectacles could we run this German

prisoner stunt alongside the British; or d'you think it would kill it?〃



Mr。 Lavender almost rose from his chair in surprise。  〃Are you〃 he

said; 〃is it〃



The small man hiccoughed; and said in a raw voice:



〃The letters are falling off。〃



〃Ah!〃 murmured the editor; 〃I thought we should be through by Thursday。

We'll start this new stunt Thursday。  Give it all prominence; Crackamup。

It'll focus fury。  All to the goodall to the good。  Opinion's ripe。〃

Then for a moment he seemed to hesitate; and his chin sank back on his

chest。  〃I don't know;〃 he murmured of course it may〃



〃Please;〃 began Mr。 Lavender; rising; while the small man hiccoughed

again。  The two motions seemed to determine the editor。



〃That's all right; sir; 〃 he said; rising also; 〃that's quite all right。

We'll say Thursday; and risk it。  Thursday; Crackamup。  〃And he held out

his hand to Mr。 Lavender。  〃Good morning; sir; good morning。  Delighted

to have seen you。  You wouldn't put your name to it?  Well; well; it

doesn't matter; only you could have written it。  The turn of phrase

immense!  They'll tumble all right!〃  And Mr。 Lavender found himself;

with Mr。 Crackamup; in the lobby。  〃It's bewildering;〃 he thought; 〃how

quickly he settled that。  And yet he had such repose。  But is there some

mistake?〃  He was about to ask his companion; but with a distant hiccough

the small man had vanished。  Thus deserted; Mr。 Lavender was in two minds

whether to ask to be readmitted; when the four gentlemen with notebooks

repassed him in single file into the editor's room。



〃My name is Lavender;〃 he said resolutely to the young woman。  〃Is that

all right?〃



〃Quite;〃 she answered; without looking up。



Mr。 Lavender went out slowly; thinking; 〃I may perhaps have said more in

that interview than I remember。  Next time I really will insist on having

a proof。  Or have they taken me for some other public man?〃 This notion

was so disagreeable; however; that he dismissed it; and passed into the

street。



On Thursday; the day fixed for his fresh tour of public speaking; he

opened the great journal eagerly。  Above the third column was the

headline:  OUR VITAL DUTY: BY A GREAT PUBLIC MAN。  〃That must be it;〃 he

thought。  The article; which occupied just a column of precious space;

began with an appeal so moving that before he had read twenty lines Mr。

Lavender had identified himself completely with the writer; and if anyone

had told him that he had not uttered these sentiments; he would have

given him the lie direct。  Working from heat to heat the article finished

in a glorious outburst with a passionate appeal to the country to starve

all German prisoners。



Mr。 Lavender put it down in a glow of exultation。  〃I shall translate

words into action;〃 he thought; 〃I shall at once visit a rural district

where German prisoners are working on the land; and see that the farmers

do their duty。  〃And; forgetting in his excitement to eat his breakfast;

he put the journal in his pocket; wrapped himself in his dust…coat and

broad…brimmed hat; and went out to his car; which was drawn up; with

Blink; who had not forgotten her last experience; inside。



〃We will go to a rural district; Joe;〃 he said; getting in。



〃Very good; sir;〃 answered Joe ; and; unnoticed by the population; they

glided into the hazy heat of the June morning。



〃Well; what abaht it; sir?〃 said Joe; after they had proceeded for some

three hours。  〃Here we are。〃



Mr。 Lavender; who had been lost in the beauty of the scenes through which

he was passing; awoke from reverie; and said:



〃I am looking for German prisoners; Joe; if you see a farmer; you might

stop。〃



〃Any sort of farmer?〃 asked Joe。



〃Is there more than one sort?〃 returned Mr。 Lavender; smiling。



Joe cocked his eye。  〃Ain't you never lived in the country; sir?〃



〃Not for more than a few weeks at a time; Joe; unless Rochester counts。

Of course; I know Eastbourne very well。〃



〃I know Eastbourne from the inside;〃 said Joe discursively。  〃I was a

waiter there once。〃



〃An interesting life; a waiter's; Joe; I should think。〃



〃Ah!  Everything comes to 'im who waits; they say。  But abaht farmers

you've got a lot to learn; sir。〃



〃I am always conscious of that; Joe; the ramifications of public life are

innumerable。〃



〃I could give you some rummikins abaht farmers。  I once travelled in

breeches。〃



〃You seem to have done a great many things Joe。〃



〃That's right; sir。  I've been a sailor; a 'traveller;' a waiter; a

scene…shifter; and a shover; and I don't know which was the cushiest job。

But; talking of farmers: there's the old English type that wears

Bedfordsdon't you go near 'im; 'e bites。  There's the modern scientific

farmer; but it'll take us a week to find 'im。  And there's the small…

'older; wearin' trahsers; likely as not; I don't think 'e'd be any use to

you。



〃What am I to do then?〃 asked Mr Lavender。



〃Ah!〃 said Joe; 'ave lunch。〃



Mr。 Lavender sighed; his hunger quarelling with his sense of duty。  〃I

should like to have found a farmer first;〃 he said。



〃Well; sir; I'll drive up to that clump o'beeches; and you can have a

look round for one while I get lunch ready。



〃That will do admirably。〃



There's just one thing; sir;〃 said Joe; when his master was about to

start; 〃don't you take any house you come across for a farm。  They're

mostly cottages o' gentility nowadays; in'abited by lunatics。〃



〃I shall be very careful;〃 said Mr。 Lavender。



〃This glorious land!〃 he thought; walking away from the beech clump; with

Blink at his heels; 〃how wonderful to see it being restored to its former

fertility under pressure of the war!  The farmer must be a happy man;

indeed; working so nobly for his country; without thought of his own

prosperity。  How flowery those beans look already!〃  he mused; glancing

at a field of potatoes。  〃Now that I am here I shall be able to combine

my work on German prisoners with an effort to stimulate food production。

Blink!〃  For Blink was lingering in a gateway。  Moving back to her; Mr。

Lavender saw that the sagacious animal was staring through the gate at a

farmer who was standing in a field perfectly still; with his back turned;

about thirty yards away。



〃Have you〃 Mr。 Lavender began eagerly; 〃is itare you employing any

German prisoners; sir?〃



The farmer did not seem to hear。  〃He must;〃 thought Mr。 Lavender; 〃be of

the old stolid English variety。〃



The farmer; who was indeed attired in a bowler hat and Bedford cords;

continued to gaze over his land; unconscious of Mr。 Lavender's presence。



〃I am asking you a question; sir;〃 resumed the latter in a louder voice。〃

And however patriotically absorbed you may be in cultivating your soil;

there is no necessity for rudeness。〃



The farmer did not move a muscle。



〃Sir;〃 began Mr。 Lavender again; very patiently; 〃though I have always

heard that the British farmer is of all men least amenable to influence

and new ideas; I have never believed it; and I am persuaded that if you

will but listen I shall be able to alter your whole outlook about the

agricultural future of this country。〃  For it had suddenly occurred to

him that it might be a long time before he had again such an opportunity

of addressing a rural audience on the growth of food; and he was loth to

throw away the chance。  The farmer; however; continued to stand with his

hack to the speaker; paying no more heed to his voice than to the buzzing

of a fly。



〃You SHALL hear me;〃 cried Mr。 Lavender; unconsciously miming a voice

from the past; and catching; as he thought; the sound of a titter; he

flung his hand out; and exclaimed:



〃Grass; gentlemen; grass is the hub of the matter。  We have put our hand

to the plough〃and; his imagination taking flight at those words; he

went on in a voice calculated to reach the great assembly of farmers

which he now saw before him with their backs turned〃and never shall we

take it away till we have reduced every acre in the country to an arable

condition。  In the future not only must we feed ourselves; but our dogs;

our horses; and our children; and restore the land to its pristine glory

in the front rank of the world's premier industry。  But me no buts;〃 he

went on with a winning smile; remembering that geniality is essential in

addressing a country audience; 〃and butter me no butter; for in future we

shall require to grow our margarine as well。  Let us; in a word; put

behind us all prejudice and pusillanimity till we see this country of

ours once more blooming like one great cornfield; covered with cows。

Sirs; I am no iconoclast; let us do all this without departing in any way

from those great principles of Free Trade; Industrialism; and Individual

Liberty which have made our towns the largest; most cr

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