the pit-第67部分

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r。　　The　Pit　should　not　have　him；　the　sweep　of　that　great　whirlpool　should　never　again　prevail　against　the　power　of　love。

Yes；　she　had　suffered；　she　had　known　the　humiliation　of　a　woman　neglected。　　But　it　was　to　end　now；　her　pride　would　never　again　be　lowered；　her　love　never　again　be　ignored。

But　the　afternoon　passed　and　evening　drew　on　without　any　word　from　him。　　In　spite　of　her　anxiety；　she　yet　murmured　over　and　over　again　as　she　paced　the　floor　of　her　room；　listening　for　the　ringing　of　the　door　bell：

〃He　will　send　word；　he　will　send　word。　　I　know　he　will。〃

By　four　o'clock　she　had　begun　to　dress。　　Never　had　she　made　a　toilet　more　superb；　more　careful。　　She　disdained　a　〃costume　　on　this　great　evening。　　It　was　not　to　be　〃Theodora〃　now；　nor　〃Juliet；〃　nor　〃Carmen。〃　　It　was　to　be　only　Laura　Jadwinjust　herself；　unaided　by　theatricals；　unadorned　by　tinsel。　　But　it　seemed　consistent　none　the　less　to　choose　her　most　beautiful　gown　for　the　occasion；　to　panoply　herself　in　every　charm　that　was　her　own。　　Her　dress；　that　closely　sheathed　the　low；　flat　curves　of　her　body　and　that　left　her　slender　arms　and　neck　bare；　was　one　shimmer　of　black　scales；　iridescent；　undulating　with　light　to　her　every　movement。　　In　the　coils　and　masses　of　her　black　hair　she　fixed　her　two　great　_cabochons_　of　pearls；　and　clasped　about　her　neck　her　palm…broad　collaret　of　pearls　and　diamonds。　　Against　one　shoulder　nodded　a　bunch　of　Jacqueminots；　royal　red；　imperial。

It　was　hard　upon　six　o'clock　when　at　last　she　dismissed　her　maid。　　Left　alone；　she　stood　for　a　moment　in　front　of　her　long　mirror　that　reflected　her　image　from　head　to　foot；　and　at　the　sight　she　could　not　forbear　a　smile　and　a　sudden　proud　lifting　of　her　head。　　All　the　woman　in　her　preened　and　plumed　herself　in　the　consciousness　of　the　power　of　her　beauty。　　Let　the　Battle　of　the　Street　clamour　never　so　loudly　now；　let　the　suction　of　the　Pit　be　never　so　strong；　Eve　triumphed。　　_Venus　toute　entiere　s'attachait　a　sa　proie。_

These　women　of　America；　these　others　who　allowed　business　to　draw　their　husbands　from　them　more　and　more；　who　submitted　to　those　cruel　conditions　that　forced　them　to　be　content　with　the　wreckage　left　after　the　storm　and　stress　of　the　day's　workthe　jaded　mind；　the　exhausted　body；　the　faculties　dulled　by　overwork　she　was　sorry　for　them。　　They；　less　radiant　than　herself；　less　potent　to　charm；　could　not　call　their　husbands　back。　　But　she；　Laura；　was　beautiful；　she　knew　it；　she　gloried　in　her　beauty。　　It　was　her　strength。　She　felt　the　same　pride　in　it　as　the　warrior　in　a　finely　tempered　weapon。

And　to…night　her　beauty　was　brighter　than　ever。　　It　was　a　veritable　aureole　that　crowned　her。　　She　knew　herself　to　be　invincible。　　So　only　that　he　saw　her　thus；　she　knew　that　she　would　conquer。　　And　he　would　come。　　〃If　he　loved　her；〃　she　had　said。　　By　his　love　for　her　he　had　promised；　by　his　love　she　knew　she　would　prevail。

And　then　at　last；　somewhere　out　of　the　twilight；　somewhere　out　of　those　lowest；　unplumbed　depths　of　her　own　heart；　came　the　first　tremor　of　doubt；　come　the　tardy　vibration　of　the　silver　cord　which　Page　had　struck　so　sharply。　　Was　itafter　allLove；　that　she　cherished　and　strove　forlove；　or　self…love？　　Ever　since　Page　had　spoken　she　seemed　to　have　fought　against　the　intrusion　of　this　idea。　　But；　little　by　little；　it　rose　to　the　surface。　　At　last；　for　an　instant；　it　seemed　to　confront　her。

Was　this；　after　all；　the　right　way　to　win　her　husband　back　to　herthis　display　of　her　beauty；　this　parade　of　dress；　this　exploitation　of　self？

Self；　self。　　Had　she　been　selfish　from　the　very　first？　What　real　interest　had　she　taken　in　her　husband's　work？〃　Right　or　wrong；　good　or　bad；　I　would　put　my　two　hands　into　the　fire　to　help　him。〃　　Was　this　the　way？　　Was　not　this　the　only　way？　　Win　him　back　to　her？　　What　if　there　were　more　need　for　her　to　win　back　to　him？　　Oh；　once　she　had　been　able　to　say　that　love；　the　supreme　triumph　of　a　woman's　life；　was　less　a　victory　than　a　capitulation。　　Had　she　ordered　her　life　upon　that　ideal？　　Did　she　even　believe　in　the　ideal　at　this　day？　Whither　had　this　cruel　cult　of　self　led　her？

Dimly　Laura　Jadwin　began　to　see　and　to　understand　a　whole　new　conception　of　her　little　world。　　The　birth　of　a　new　being　within　her　was　not　for　that　night。　　It　was　conception　onlythe　sensation　of　a　new　element；　a　new　force　that　was　not　herself；　somewhere　in　the　inner　chambers　of　her　being。

The　woman　in　her　was　too　complex；　the　fibres　of　character　too　intricate　and　mature　to　be　wrenched　into　new　shapes　by　any　sudden　revolution。　　But　just　so　surely　as　the　day　was　going；　just　so　surely　as　the　New　Day　would　follow　upon　the　night；　conception　had　taken　place　within　her。　　Whatever　she　did　that　evening；　whatever　came　to　her；　through　whatever　crises　she　should　hurry；　she　would　not　now　be　quite　the　same。　　She　had　been　accustomed　to　tell　herself　that　there　were　two　Lauras。　　Now　suddenly；　behold；　she　seemed　to　recognise　a　thirda　third　that　rose　above　and　forgot　the　other　two；　that　in　some　beautiful；　mysterious　way　was　identity　ignoring　self。

But　the　change　was　not　to　be　abrupt。　　Very；　very　vaguely　the　thoughts　came　to　her。　　The　change　would　be　slow；　slowwould　be　evolution；　not　revolution。　　The　consummation　was　to　be　achieved　in　the　coming　years。　For　to…night　she　waswhat　was　she？　　Only　a　woman；　weak；　torn　by　emotion；　driven　by　impulse；　and　entering　upon　what　she　imagined　was　a　great　crisis　in　her　life。

But　meanwhile　the　time　was　passing。　　Laura　descended　to　the　library　and；　picking　up　a　book；　composed　herself　to　read。　　When　six　o'clock　struck；　she　made　haste　to　assure　herself　that　of　course　she　could　not　expect　him　exactly　on　the　hour。　　No；　she　must　make　allowances；　the　dayas　Page　had　suspectedhad　probably　been　an　important　one。　　He　would　be　a　little　late；　but　he　would　come　soon。　　〃If　you　love　me；　you　will　come；〃　she　had　said。

But　an　hour　later　Laura　paced　the　room　with　tight…shut　lips　and　burning　cheeks。　　She　was　still　alone；　her　day；　her　hour；　was　passing；　and　he　had　not　so　much　as　sent　word。　　For　a　moment　the　thought　occurred　to　her　that　he　might　perhaps　be　in　great　trouble；　in　great　straits；　that　there　was　an　excuse。　　But　instantly　she　repudiated　the　notion。

〃No；　no；〃　she　cried；　beneath　her　breath。　　〃He　should　come；　no　matter　what　has　happened。　　Or　even；　at　the　very　least；　he　could　send　word。〃

The　minutes　dragged　by。　　No　roll　of　wheels　echoed　under　the　carriage　porch；　no　step　sounded　at　the　outer　door。　The　house　was　still；　the　street　without　was　still；　the　silence　of　the　midsummer　evening　widened；　unbroken　around　her；　like　a　vast　calm　pool。　　Only　the　musical　Gregorians　of　the　newsboys　chanting　the　evening's　extras　from　corner　to　corner　of　the　streets　rose　into　the　air　from　time　to　time。　　She　was　once　more　alone。　Was　she　to　fail　again？　　Was　she　to　be　set　aside　once　more；　as　so　often　heretoforeset　aside；　flouted；　ignored；　forgotten？　　〃If　you　love　me；〃　she　had　said。

And　this　was　to　be　the　supreme　test。　　This　evening　was　to　decide　which　was　the　great　influence　of　his　life　was　to　prove　whether　or　not　love　was　paramount。　　This　was　the　crucial　hour。　　〃And　he　knows　it；〃　cried　Laura。　〃He　knows　it。　　He　did　not　forget；　could　not　have　forgotten。〃

The　half　hour　passed；　then　the　hour；　and　as　eight　o'clock　chimed　from　the　clock　over　the　mantelshelf　Laura　stopped；　suddenly　rigid；　in　the　midst　of　the　floor。

Her　anger　leaped　like　fire　within　her。　　All　the　passion　of　the　woman　scorned　shook　her　from　head　to　foot。　　At　the　very　moment　of　her　triumph　she　had　been　flouted；　in　the　pitch　of　her　pride！　And　this　was　not　the　only　time。　All　at　once　the　past　disappointments；　slights；　and　humiliations　came　again　to　her　memory。　　She　had　pleaded；　and　had　been　rebuffed　again　and　again；　she　had　given　all　and　had　received　neglectshe；　Laura；　beautiful　beyond　other　women；　who　had　known　love；　devoted　service；　and　the　most　thoughtful　consideration　from　her　earliest　girlhood；　had　been　cast　aside。

Suddenly　she　bent　her　head　quickly；　listening　intently。　Then　she　drew　a　deep　breath；　murmuring　〃At　last；　at　last！〃

For　the　sound　of　a　footstep　in　the　vestibule　was　unmistakable。　　He　had　come　after　all。　　But　so　late；　so　late！　No；　she　could　not　be　gracious　at　once；　he　must　be　made　to　feel　how　deeply　he　had　offended；　he　must　sue　humbly；　very　humbly；　for　pardon。　　The　servant's　step　sounded　in　the　hall　on　the　way　towards　the　front　door。

〃I　am　in　here；　Matthew；〃　she　called。　　〃In　the　library。　Tell　him　I　am　in　here。〃

She　cast　a　quick　glance　at　herself　in　the　mirror　close　at　hand；　touched　her　hair　with　rapid　fingers；　smoothed　the　agitation　from　her　forehead；　and　sat　down　in　a　deep　chair　near　the　fireplace；　opening　a　book；　turning　her　back　towards　the　door。

She　heard　him　come　in；　but　did　not　move。　　Even　as　he　crossed　the　floor　she　kept　her　head　turned　away。　　The　footsteps　paused　near　at　hand。　　There　was　a　moment's　silence。　　Then　slowly　Laura；　laying　down　her　book；　turned　and　faced　him。

〃With　many　very；　very　happy　returns　of　the　day；〃　said　Sheldon　Corthell；　as　he　held　towards　her　a　cluster　of　deep…blue　violets。

Laura　sprang　to　her　feet；　a　hand　upon　her　cheek；　her　eyes　wide　and　flashing。

〃You？〃　was　all　she　had　breath　to　utter。　　〃You？〃

The　artist　smiled　as　he　laid　the　flowers　upon　the　table。　　〃I　am　going　away　again　to…morrow；〃　he　said；　〃for　always；　I　think。　　Have　I　startled　you？　　I　only　came　to　say　good…byand　to　wish　you　a　happy　birthday。〃

〃Oh　you　remembered！〃　she　cried。　　〃_You_　remembered！　I　might　have　known　you　would。〃

But　the　revulsion　had　been　too　great。　　She　had　been　wrong　after　all。　　Jadwin　had　forgotten。　　Emotions　to　which　she　could　put　no　name　swelled　in　her　heart　and　rose　in　a　quick；　gasping　sob　to　her　throat。　　The　tears　sprang　to　her　eyes。　　Old　impulses；　forgotten　impetuosities　whipped　her　on。

〃Oh；　you　remembered；　you　remembered！〃　she　cried　again；　holding　out　both　her　hands。

He　caught　them　in　his　own。

〃Remembered！〃　he　echoed。　　〃I　have　never　forgotten。〃

〃No；　no；〃　she　replied；　shaking　her　head；　winking　back　the　tears。　　〃You　don't　understand。　　I　spoke　before　I　thought。　　You　don't　understand。〃

〃I　do；　believe　me；　I　do；〃　he　exclaimed。　　〃I　understand　you　better　than　you　understand　yourself。〃

Laura's　answer　was　a　cry。

〃Oh；　then；　why　did　you　ever　leave　meyou　who　did