the awakening and selected short stories(苏醒)-第39部分
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journeys from home； and his motherless daughter was coming to stay with
her aunts at Cote Joyeuse。
They talked about it； sipping their coffee on the ruined portico。
Mam'selle Pauline was terribly excited； the flush that throbbed into her
pale； nervous face showed it； and she locked her thin fingers in and out
incessantly。
〃But what shall we do with La Petite； Sesoeur？ Where shall we put
her？ How shall we amuse her？ Ah； Seigneur！〃
〃She will sleep upon a cot in the room next to ours；〃 responded
Ma'ame Pelagie； 〃and live as we do。 She knows how we live； and why
we live； her father has told her。 She knows we have money and could
squander it if we chose。 Do not fret； Pauline； let us hope La Petite is a
true Valmet。〃
Then Ma'ame Pelagie rose with stately deliberation and went to saddle
her horse； for she had yet to make her last daily round through the fields；
and Mam'selle Pauline threaded her way slowly among the tangled grasses
toward the cabin。
The coming of La Petite； bringing with her as she did the pungent
atmosphere of an outside and dimly known world； was a shock to these
two； living their dream…life。 The girl was quite as tall as her aunt Pelagie；
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with dark eyes that reflected joy as a still pool reflects the light of stars；
and her rounded cheek was tinged like the pink crepe myrtle。 Mam'selle
Pauline kissed her and trembled。 Ma'ame Pelagie looked into her eyes
with a searching gaze； which seemed to seek a likeness of the past in the
living present。
And they made room between them for this young life。
II
La Petite had determined upon trying to fit herself to the strange；
narrow existence which she knew awaited her at Cote Joyeuse。 It went
well enough at first。 Sometimes she followed Ma'ame Pelagie into the
fields to note how the cotton was opening； ripe and white； or to count the
ears of corn upon the hardy stalks。 But oftener she was with her aunt
Pauline； assisting in household offices； chattering of her brief past； or
walking with the older woman arm…in…arm under the trailing moss of the
giant oaks。
Mam'selle Pauline's steps grew very buoyant that summer； and her
eyes were sometimes as bright as a bird's； unless La Petite were away
from her side； when they would lose all other light but one of uneasy
expectancy。 The girl seemed to love her well in return； and called her
endearingly Tan'tante。 But as the time went by； La Petite became very
quiet；not listless； but thoughtful； and slow in her movements。 Then her
cheeks began to pale； till they were tinged like the creamy plumes of the
white crepe myrtle that grew in the ruin。
One day when she sat within its shadow； between her aunts； holding a
hand of each； she said： 〃Tante Pelagie； I must tell you something； you and
Tan'tante。〃 She spoke low； but clearly and firmly。 〃I love you both；please
remember that I love you both。 But I must go away from you。 I can't
live any longer here at Cote Joyeuse。 〃
A spasm passed through Mam'selle Pauline's delicate frame。 La
Petite could feel the twitch of it in the wiry fingers that were intertwined
with her own。 Ma'ame Pelagie remained unchanged and motionless。 No
human eye could penetrate so deep as to see the satisfaction which her
soul felt。 She said： 〃What do you mean； Petite？ Your father has sent you
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to us； and I am sure it is his wish that you remain。〃
〃My father loves me； tante Pelagie； and such will not be his wish when
he knows。 Oh！〃 she continued with a restless； movement； 〃it is as though
a weight were pressing me backward here。 I must live another life； the
life I lived before。 I want to know things that are happening from day to
day over the world； and hear them talked about。 I want my music； my
books； my companions。 If I had known no other life but this one of
privation； I suppose it would be different。 If I had to live this life； I
should make the best of it。 But I do not have to； and you know； tante
Pelagie； you do not need to。 It seems to me；〃 she added in a whisper；
〃that it is a sin against myself。 Ah； Tan'tante！what is the matter with
Tan'tante？〃
It was nothing； only a slight feeling of faintness； that would soon pass。
She entreated them to take no notice； but they brought her some water and
fanned her with a palmetto leaf。
But that night； in the stillness of the room； Mam'selle Pauline sobbed
and would not be comforted。 Ma'ame Pelagie took her in her arms。
〃Pauline； my little sister Pauline；〃 she entreated； 〃I never have seen
you like this before。 Do you no longer love me？ Have we not been
happy together； you and I？〃
〃Oh； yes； Sesoeur。〃
〃Is it because La Petite is going away？〃
〃Yes； Sesoeur。〃
〃Then she is dearer to you than I！〃 spoke Ma'ame Pelagie with sharp
resentment。 〃Than I； who held you and warmed you in my arms the day
you were born； than I； your mother； father； sister； everything that could
cherish you。 Pauline； don't tell me that。〃
Mam'selle Pauline tried to talk through her sobs。
〃I can't explain it to you； Sesoeur。 I don't understand it myself。 I love
you as I have always loved you； next to God。 But if La Petite goes away
I shall die。 I can't understand；help me； Sesoeur。 She seemsshe
seems like a saviour； like one who had come and taken me by the hand
and was leading me somewhere…somewhere I want to go。〃
Ma'ame Pelagie had been sitting beside the bed in her peignoir and
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slippers。 She held the hand of her sister who lay there； and smoothed
down the woman's soft brown hair。 She said not a word； and the silence
was broken only by Mam'selle Pauline's continued sobs。 Once Ma'ame
Pelagie arose to mix a drink of orange…flower water； which she gave to her
sister； as she would have offered it to a nervous； fretful child。 Almost an
hour passed before Ma'ame Pelagie spoke again。 Then she said：
〃Pauline； you must cease that sobbing； now； and sleep。 You will
make yourself ill。 La Petite will not go away。 Do you hear me？ Do you
understand？ She will stay； I promise you。〃
Mam'selle Pauline could not clearly comprehend； but she had great
faith in the word of her sister； and soothed by the promise and the touch of
Ma'ame Pelagie's strong； gentle hand； she fell asleep。
III
Ma'ame Pelagie； when she saw that her sister slept； arose noiselessly
and stepped outside upon the low…roofed narrow gallery。 She did not linger
there； but with a step that was hurried and agitated； she crossed the
distance that divided her cabin from the ruin。
The night was not a dark one； for the sky was clear and the moon
resplendent。 But light or dark would have made no difference to Ma'ame
Pelagie。 It was not the first time she had stolen away to the ruin at night…
time； when the whole plantation slept； but she never before had been there
with a heart so nearly broken。 She was going there for the last time to
dream her dreams； to see the visions that hitherto had crowded her days
and nights； and to bid them farewell。
There was the first of them； awaiting her upon the very portal； a robust
old white…haired man； chiding her for returning home so late。 There are
guests to be entertained。 Does she not know it？ Guests from the city
and from the near plantations。 Yes； she knows it is late。 She had been
abroad with Felix； and they did not notice how the time was speeding。
Felix is there； he will explain it all。 He is there beside her； but she does
not want to hear what he will tell her father。
Ma'ame Pelagie had sunk upon the bench where she and her sister so
often came to sit。 Turning； she gazed in through the gaping chasm of the
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window at her side。 The interior of the ruin is ablaze。 Not with the
moonlight； for that is faint beside the other onethe sparkle from the
crystal candelabra； which negroes； moving noiselessly and respectfully
about； are lighting； one aft
