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When others waste; 'tis growing…time with me!
I feel it; Master Trueworth!  Vigour; sir;
In every joint of mecould run!could leap!
Why shouldn't I marry?  Knife and fork I play
Better than many a boy of twenty…five …
Why shouldn't I marry?  If they come to wine;
My brace of bottles can I carry home;
And ne'er a headache。  Death! why shouldn't I marry?

True。  I see in nature no impediment。

Sir Wil。  Impediment?  She's all appliances! …
And fortune's with me; too!  The Widow Green
Gives hints to me。  The pleasant Widow Green
Whose fortieth year; instead of autumn; brings;
A second summer in。  Odds bodikins;
How young she looks!  What life is in her eyes!
What ease is in her gait!while; as she walks;
Her waist; still tapering; takes it pliantly!
How lollingly she bears her head withal:
On this side nownow that!  When enters she
A drawing…room; what worlds of gracious things
Her curtsey says!she sinks with such a sway;
Greeting on either hand the company;
Then slowly rises to her state again!
She is the empress of the card…table!
Her hand and arm!Gods; did you see her deal …
With curved and pliant wrist dispense the pack;
Which; at the touch of her fair fingers fly!
How soft she speakshow very soft!  Her voice
Comes melting from her round and swelling throat;
Reminding you of sweetest; mellowest things …
Plums; peaches; apricots; and nectarines …
Whose bloom is poor to paint her cheeks and lips。
By Jove; I'll marry!

True。  You forget; Sir William;
I do not know the lady。

Sir Wil。  Great your loss。
By all the gods I'll marry!but my daughter
Must needs be married first。  She rules my house;
Would rule it still; and will not have me wed。
A clever; handsome; darling; forward minx!
When I became a widower; the reins
Her mother dropped she caught;a hoyden girl;
Nor; since; would e'er give up; howe'er I strove
To coax or catch them from her。  One way still
Or t'other she would keep themlaugh; pout; plead;
Now vanquish me with water; now with fire;
Would box my face; and; ere I well could ope
My mouth to chide her; stop it with a kiss!
The monkey!  What a plague she's to me!  How
I love her! how I love the Widow Green!

True。  Then marry her!

Sir Wil。  I tell thee; first of all
Must needs my daughter marry。  See I not
A hope of that; she nought affects the sex:
Comes suitor after suitorall in vain。
Fast as they bow she curtsies; and says; 〃Nay!〃
Or she; a woman; lacks a woman's heart;
Or hath a special taste which none can hit。

True。  Or taste; perhaps; which is already hit。

Sir Wil。  Eh!how?

True。  Remember you no country friend;
Companion of her walksher squire to church;
Her beau whenever she went visiting …
Before she came to town?

Sir Wil。  No!

True。  None?art sure?
No playmate when she was a girl?

Sir Wil。  O! ay!
That Master Wildrake; I did pray thee go
And wait for at the inn; but had forgotten。
Is he come?

True。  And in the house。  Some friends that met him;
As he alighted; laid strong hands upon Him;
And made him stop for dinner。  We had else
Been earlier with you。

Sir Wil。  Ha!  I am glad he is come。

True。  She may be smit with him。

Sir Wil。  As cat with dog!

True。  He heard her voice as we did mount the stairs;
And darted straight to join her。

Sir Wil。  You shall see
What wondrous calm and harmony take place;
When fire meets gunpowder!

Con。  'Without。'  Who sent for you?
What made you come?

Wild。  'Without。'  To see the town; not you!  A kiss!

Con。  I vow I'll not。

Wild。  I swear you shall。

Con。  A saucy cub!  I vow; I had as lief
Your whipper…in had kissed me。

Sir Wil。  Do you hear?

True。  I do。  Most pleasing discords!

'Enter CONSTANCE and WILDRAKE。'

Con。  Father; speak
To neighbour Wildrake!

Sir Wil。  Very glad to see him!

Wild。  I thank you; good Sir William!  Give you joy
Of your good looks!

Con。  What; Phoebe!Phoebe!Phoebe!

Sir Wil。  What wantest thou with thy lap…dog?

Con。  Only; sir;
To welcome neighbour Wildrake!  What a figure
To show himself in town!

Sir Wil。  Wilt hold thy peace?

Con。  Yes; if you'll lesson me to hold my laughter!
Wildrake。

Wild。  Well?

Con。  Let me walk thee in the Park …
How they would stare at thee!

Sir Wil。  Wilt ne'er give o'er?

Wild。  Nay; let her have her wayI heed her not!
Though to more courteous welcome I have right;
Although I am neighbour Wildrake!  Reason is reason!

Con。  And right is right! so welcome; neighbour Wildrake;
I am very; very; very glad to see you!
Come; for a quarter of an hour we'll e'en
Agree together!  How do your horses; neighbour?

Wild。  Pshaw!

Con。  And your dogs?

Wild。  Pshaw!

Con。  Whipper…in and huntsman?

Sir Wil。  Converse of things thou knowest to talk about!

Con。  And keep him silent; father; when I know
He cannot talk of any other things?
How does thy hunter?  What a sorry trick
He played thee t'other day; to balk his leap
And throw thee; neighbour!  Did he balk the leap?
Confess!  You sportsmen never are to blame!
Say you are fowlers; 'tis your dog's in fault!
Say you are anglers; 'tis your tackle's wrong;
Say you are hunters; why the honest horse
That bears your weight; must bear your blunders too!
Why; whither go you?

Wild。  Anywhere from thee。

Con。  With me you mean。

Wild。  I mean it not。

Con。  You do!
I'll give you fifty reasons for'tand first;
Where you go; neighbour; I'll go!

'They go outWILDRAKE; pettishlyCONSTANCE laughing。'

Sir Wil。  Do you mark?
Much love is there!

True。  Indeed; a heap; or none!
I'd wager on the heap!

Sir Wil。  Ay!Do you think
These discords; as in the musicians' art;
Are subtle servitors to harmony?
That all this war's for peace?  This wrangling but
A masquerade where love his roguish face
Conceals beneath an ugly visor!Well?

True。  Your guess and my conceit are not a mile
Apart。  Unlike to other common flowers;
The flower of love shews various in the bud;
'Twill look a thistle; and 'twill blow a rose!
And with your leave I'll put it to the test;
Affect myself; for thy fair daughter; love …
Make him my confidantdilate to him
Upon the graces of her heart and mind;
Feature and formthat well may comment bear …
Tilllike the practised connoisseur; who finds
A gem of heart out in a household picture
The unskilled owner held so cheap he grudged
Renewal of the chipped and tarnished frame;
But values now as pricelessI arouse him
Into a quick sense of the worth of that
Whose merit hitherto; from lack of skill;
Or dulling habit of acquaintanceship;
He has not been awake to。

Con。  'Without。'  Neighbour Wildrake!

Sir Wil。  Hither they come。  I fancy well thy game!
O to be free to marry Widow Green!
I'll call her hence anonthen ply him well。

'SIR WILLIAM goes out。'

Wild。  'Without。'  Nay; neighbour Constance!

True。  He is high in storm。

'Enter WILDRAKE and CONSTANCE。'

Wild。  To Lincolnshire; I tell thee。

Con。  Lincolnshire!
What; prithee; takes thee off to Lincolnshire?

Wild。  Too great delight in thy fair company。

True。  Nay; Master Wildrake; why away so soon?
You are scarce a day in town!Extremes like this;
And starts of purpose; are the signs of love。
Though immatured as yet。  'Aside。'

Con。  He's long enough
In town!  What should he here?  He's lost in town:
No man is he for concerts; balls; or routs!
No game he knows at cards; save rare Pope Joan!
He ne'er could master dance beyond a jig;
And as for music; nothing to compare
To the melodious yelping of a hound;
Except the braying of his huntsman's horn!
Ask HIM to stay in town!

Sir Wil。  'Without。'  Hoa; Constance!

Con。  Sir! …
Neighbour; a pleasant ride to Lincolnshire!
Good…bye!

Sir Wil。  'Without。'  Why; Constance!

Con。  Coming; sir。  Shake hands!
Neighbour; good…bye!  Don't look so woe…begone;
'Tis but a two…days' ride; and thou wilt see
Rover; and Spot; and Nettle; and the rest
Of thy dear country friends!

Sir Wil。  'Without。'  Constance!  I say。

Con。  Anon!Commend me to the gentle souls;
And pat them for me!Will you; neighbour Wildrake?

Sir Wil。  'Without。'  Why; Constance!  Constance!

Con。  In a moment; sir!
Good…bye!I'd cry; dear neighbourif I could!
Good…bye!A pleasant day when next you hunt!
And; prithee; mind thy horse don't balk his leap!
Good…bye!and; after dinner; drink my health!
〃A bumper; sirs; to neighbour Constance!〃Do! …
And give it with a speech; wherein unfold
My many graces; more accomplishments;
And virtues topping eitherin a word;
How I'm the fairest; kindest; best of neighbours!

'They go out severally。TRUEWORTH trying to pacify WILDRAKE
CONSTANCE laughing。'



ACT II。



SCENE I。A Room in Sir William's House。


'Enter TRUEWORTH and WILDRAKE。'

Wild。  Nay; Master Trueworth; I must needs be gone!
She treats me worse and worse!  I am a stock;
That words have none to pay her。  For her sake
I quit the town to…day。  I like a jest;
But hers are jests past bearing。  I am her butt;
She nothing does but practise on!  A plague! …
Fly her shafts ever your way?

True。  Would they did!

Wild。  Art mad?or wishest she should drive thee so?

True。  Thou knowest her not。

Wild。  I know not neighbour Constance?
Then know I not myself; or anything
Which as myself I know!

True。  Heigh ho!

Wild。  Heigh ho!
Why what a burden that for a man's song!
Would fit a maiden that was sick for love。
Heigh ho!  Come ride with me to Lincolnshire;
And turn thy 〃Heigh ho!〃 into 〃hilly ho!〃

True。  Nay; rather tarry thou in town with me。
Men sometimes find a friend's hand of avail;
When useless proves their own。  Wilt lend me thine?

Wild。  Or may my horse break down in a steeple…chase!

True。  A steeple…chase。  What made thee think of that?
I'm for the steeplenot to ride a race;
Only to get there!nor alone; in sooth;
But in fair company。

Wild。  Thou'rt not in love!

True。  Heigh ho!

Wild。  Thou wouldst not marry!

True。  With your help。

Wild。  And whom; I prithee?

True。  Gentle Mistress Constance!

Wild。  What!neighbour Constance?Never did I dream
That mortal man would fall in love with her。  'Aside。'
In love with neighbour Constance!I feel strange
At thought that she should marry!'Aside。

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