the caged lion-第33部分

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One　day；　however；　when　the　feast　was　at　the　Hotel　de　Bourgogne；　and　there　were　some　slight　differences　in　the　order　of　the　guests；　the　Duke　of　Bedford　put　himself　forward　as　the　Lady　Esclairmonde's　cavalier；　so　much　to　her　relief；　that　her　countenance；　usually　so　guarded；　relaxed　into　the　bright；　sweet　smile　of　cheerfulness　that　was　most　natural　to　her。　　Isolated　as　the　pairs　at　the　table　were；　and　with　music　braying　in　a　gallery　just　above；　there　was　plenty　of　scope　for　conversation；　and　once　again　Esclairmonde　was　talking　freely　of　the　matters　regarding　the　distress　in　Paris；　that　Bedford　had　consulted　her　upon　before　he　became　so　engrossed　with　his　brother's　affairs；　or　she　so　beset　by　her　persecutors。

Towards　the　evening；　when　the　feast　had　still　some　mortal　hours　to　last；　there　fell　a　silence　on　the　Duke；　and　at　length；　when　the　music　was　at　the　loudest；　he　said　'Lady；　I　have　watched　for　this　moment。　You　are　persecuted。　　Look　not　on　me　as　one　of　your　persecutors；　but　if　no　other　refuge　be　open　to　you；　here　is　one　who　might　know　better　how　to　esteem　you　than　that　malapert　young　Scot。'

'How；　Sir？'　exclaimed　Esclairmonde；　amazed　at　these　words　from　the　woman…hating　Bedford。

'Make　no　sudden　reply；'　said　John。　　'I　had　never　thought　of　you　save　as　one　consecrate；　till；　when　I　see　you　like　to　be　hunted　down　into　the　hands　of　yon　silly　lad；　I　cannot　but　thrust　between。　　My　brother　would　willingly　consent；　and；　if　I　may　but　win　your　leave　to　love　you；　lady；　it　will　be　with　a　heart　that　has　yearned　to　no　other　woman。'

He　spoke　low　and　steadily；　looking　straight　before　him；　with　no　visible　emotion；　save　a　little　quiver　in　the　last　sentence；　a　slight　dilating　of　the　delicately　cut　nostril；　and　then　he　was　silent；　until；　having　recovered　the　self…restraint　that　had　been　failing　him；　he　prevented　the　words　she　was　trying　to　form　by　saying；　'Not　in　haste；　lady。　　There　is　time　yet　before　you　to　bethink　yourself　whether　you　can　be　free　in　will　and　conscience。　　If　so；　I　will　bear　you　through　all。'

How　invitingly　the　words　fell　on　the　lonely　heart；　so　long　left　to　fight　its　own　battles！　　There　came　for　the　first　time　the　full　sense　of　what　life　might　be；　the　shielding　tenderness；　the　sure　reliance；　the　pure　affection；　such　as　she　saw　Henry　lavish　on　the　shallow　Queen；　but　which　she　could　meet　and　requite　in　John。　　The　brutal　Boemond；　the　childish　Malcolm；　had　aroused　no　feeling　in　her　but　dislike　or　pity；　and　to　them　a　convent　was　infinitely　preferable；　but　Bedfordthe　religious；　manly；　brave；　unselfish　Bedfordopened　to　her　the　view　of　all　that　could　content　a　high…souled　woman's　heart；　backed；　moreover；　by　the　wonder　of　having　been　the　first　to　touch　such　a　spirit。

It　would　not　have　been　a　mesalliance。　　Her　family　was　one　of　the　grandest　of　the　Netherlands；　the　saintly　Emperor；　Henry　of　Luxemburg；　was　her　ancestor；　and　Bedford's　proposal　was　not　a　condescension　such　as　to　rouse　her　sense　of　dignity。　　His　rank　did　not　strike　her　as　did　his　lofty　stainless　character；　the　like　of　which　she　had　never　known　to　exist　in　the　world　of　active　life　till　she　saw　the　brothers　of　England；　who　came　more　near　to　the　armed　saints　and　holy　warriors　of　Church　legend　than　her　fancy　had　thought　mortal　man　could　do；　bred　as　she　had　been　in　the　sensual；　violent；　and　glittering　Burgundy　of　the　fifteenth　century。　　In　truth；　as　Malcolm　had　thought　the　cloister　the　only　refuge　from　the　harshness　and　barbarism　of　Scotland；　so　Esclairmonde　had　thought　piety　and　purity　to　be　found　nowhere　else；　and　both　had　found　the　Court　of　Henry　V。　an　infinitely　better　world　than　they　had　supposed　possible；　but；　until　the　present　moment；　Esclairmonde　had　never　felt　the　slightest　call　to　take　a　permanent　place　there。　　Now　however　the　cloister；　even　if　it　were　open　to　her；　presented　a　gloomy；　cheerless　life　of　austerity；　in　comparison　with　human　affection　and　matronly　duty。　　And　most　vivid　of　all　at　the　moment　was　the　desire　to　awaken　the　tender　sweetness　that　slept　in　those　steady　gray　eyes；　to　see　the　grave；　wise　visage　gleam　with　smiling　affection；　and　to　rest　in　having　one　to　take　thought　for　her；　and　finish　this　long　term　of　tossing　about　and　self…defence。　　Was　not　the　patience　with　which　he　kept　his　eyes　away　from　her　already　a　proof　of　his　consideration　and　delicate　kindness？

But　deep　in　Esclairmonde's　soul　lay　the　sense　that　her　dedication　was　sacred；　and　her　power　over　herself　gone。　　She　had　always　felt　a　wife's　allegiance　due　to　Him　whom　she　received　as　her　spiritual　Spouse；　and　though　the　sense　at　this　moment　only　brought　her　disappointment　and　self…reproach；　her　will　was　loyal。　　The　bond　was　cutting　into　her　very　flesh；　but　she　never　even　thought　of　breaking　it；　and　all　she　waited　for　was　the　power　of　restraining　her　grateful　tears。

In　this　she　was　assisted　by　observing　that　Bedford's　attention　had　been　attracted　towards　his　brother；　who　was　looking　wan　and　weary；　scarcely　tasting　what　was　set　before　him；　and；　after　fitfully　trying　to　converse　with　Marguerite　of　Burgundy；　at　last　had　taken　advantage　of　an　endless　harangue　from　all　the　Virtues；　and　had　dropped　asleep。　The　Lady　Anne　was　seen　making　a　sign　to　her　sister　not　to　disturb　him；　and　Bedford　murmured；　with　a　sigh；　'There　is；　for　once；　a　discreet　woman。'　　Then；　as　if　recalled　to　a　sense　of　what　was　passing；　he　turned　on　Esclairmonde　his　full　earnest　look；　saying；　'You　will　teach　the　Queen　how　HE　should　be　cared　for。　　You　will　help　me。'

'Sir；'　said　Esclairmonde；　feeling　it　most　difficult　not　to　falter；　'this　is　a　great　grace；　but　it　cannot　be。'

'Cannot！'　said　Bedford；　slowly。　　'You　have　taken　thought？'

'Sir；　it　is　not　the　part　of　a　betrothed　spouse　to　take　thought。　　My　vows　were　renewed　of　my　own　free　will　and　it　were　sacrilege　to　try　to　recall　them　for　the　first　real　temptation。'

She　spoke　steadily；　but　the　effort　ached　through　her　whole　frame；　especially　when　the　last　word　illumined　John　Plantagenet's　face　with　strange　sweet　light；　quenched　as　his　lip　trembled；　his　nostril　quivered；　his　eye　even　moistened；　as　he　said；　'It　is　enough；　lady；　I　will　no　more　vex　one　who　is　vexed　enough　already；　and　you　will　so　far　trust　me　as　to　regard　me　as　your　protector；　if　you　should　be　in　need？'

'Indeed　I　will；'　said　Esclairmonde；　hardly　restraining　her　tears。

'That　is　well；'　said　Bedford。　　And　he　neither　looked　at　her　nor　spoke　to　her　again；　till；　as　he　led　her　away　in　the　procession　from　the　hall；　he　held　her　hand　fast；　and　murmured：　　'There　then　it　rests；　sweet　lady　unless；　having　taken　counsel　with　your　own　heart；　you　should　change　your　decree；　and　consult　some　holy　priest。　　If　so；　make　but　a　sign　of　the　hand；　and　I　am　yours；　for　verily　you　are　the　only　maiden　I　could　ever　have　loved。'

She　was　still　in　utter　confusion；　in　the　chamber　where　the　ladies　were　cloaking　for　their　return；　when　her　hands　were　grasped　on　either　side　by　the　two　Burgundian　princesses。

'Sweet　runaway；　we　have　caught　you　at　last！　　Here；　into　Anne's　chamber。　　See　you　we　must！　　How　is　it　with　you？　　Like　you　the　limping　Scot　better　than　Boemond？'　laughed　the　Dauphiness；　her　company　dignity　laid　aside　for　school…girl　chatter。

'If　you　cannot　hold　out；'　said　Anne；　'the　Scot　seems　a　gentle　youth；　and；　at　least；　you　are　quit　of　Boemond。'

'Yes；'　said　Marguerite；　'his　last　prank　was　too　strong　for　the　Duke：　quartering　a　dozen　men…at…arms　on　a　sulky　Cambrai　weaver　till　he　paid　him　2000　crowns。　　Besides；　it　would　be　well　to　get　the　Scottish　king　for　an　ally。　　Do　you　know　what　we　two　are　here　for；　Clairette？　　We　are　both　to　be　betrothed：　　one　to　the　handsome　captive　with　the　gold　locks；　the　other　to　your　hawk…nosed　neighbour；　who　seemed　to　have　not　a　word　to　say。'

'But；'　said　Esclairmonde；　replying　to　the　easiest　part　of　the　disclosure；　'the　King　of　Scots　is　in　love　with　the　Demoiselle　of　Somerset。'

'What　matters　that；　silly　maid？'　said　Marguerite　'he　does　not　displease　me；　and　Anne　is　welcome　to　that　melancholy　duke。'

'Oh；　Lady　Anne！'　exclaimed　Esclairmonde；　'if　such　be　your　lot；　it　would　be　well　indeed。'

'What；　the　surly　brother；　of　whom　Catherine　tells　such　tales！'　continued　Marguerite。

'Credit　them　not；'　said　Esclairmonde。　　'He　never　crosses　her　but　when　he　would　open　her　eyes　to　his　brother's　failing　health。'

'Yes；'　interrupted　Marguerite；　'my　lord　brother　swears　that　this　king　will　not　live　a　year；　and　if　Catherine　have　no　better　luck　with　her　child　than　poor　Michelle；　then　there　will　be　another　good　Queen　Anne　in　England。'

'If　so；'　said　Esclairmonde；　looking　at　her　friend　with　swimming　eyes；　'she　will　have　the　best　of　husbandsas　good　as　even　she　deserves！'

Anne　held　her　hand　fast；　and　would　have　said　many　tender　words　on　Esclairmonde's　own　troubles；　but　the　other　ladies　were　arrayed；　and　Esclairmonde　would　not　for　worlds　have　been　left　behind　in　the　Hotel　de　Bourgogne。

Privacy　was　not　an　attainable　luxury；　and　Esclairmonde　could　not　commune　with　her　throbbing　heart；　or　find　peace　for　her　aching　head；　till　night。　　This　must　be　a　matter　unconfided　to　any；　even　Alice　Montagu。　　And　while　the　maiden　lay　smiling　in　her　quiet　sleep；　after　having　fondly　told　her　friend　that　Sir　Richard　Nevil　had　really　noticed　her　new　silken　kirtle；　she　knelt　on　beneath　the　crucifix；　mechanically　reciting　her　prayers；　and；　as　the　beads　dropped　from　her　fingers；　fighting　out　the　fight　with　her　own　heart。

Her　mind　was　made　up；　but　her　sense　of　the　loss；　her　craving　for　the　worthy　affection　which　lay　within　her　graspthese　dismayed　her。　　The　life　she　had　sighed　for　had　become　a　blank；　and　she　passionately　detested　the　obligation　that　held　her　back　from　affection；　usefulness；　joy；　and　excellencenot　ambition；　for　the　greatest　help　to　her　lay　in　Bedford's　position；　his　exalted　rank；　and　nearness　to　the　crown。　　Indeed；　she　really　dreaded　and　loathed　worldly　pomp　so　much　that　the　temptation　would　have　been　greater　had　he　not　been　a　prince。

It　was　this　sense　of　renunciation　that　came　to　her　aid。　　She　had　at　least　a　REAL　sacrifice　to　offer；　till　now；　as　she　became　aware；　she　had　made　none。　　She　folded　her　hands；　and　laid　her　offering　to　be　hallowed　by　the　One　all…sufficient　Sacrifice。　　She　offered　all　those　capacities　for　love　that　had　been　newly　revealed　to　her；　she　offered　up　the　bliss；　whose　golden　dawn　she　had　seen；　she　tried