fanny and the servant problem-第6部分

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d　owl＇with　a　wave　towards　the　door＇that　wanted　to　send　you　off　with　a　glass　of　beer　and　a　flea　in　your　earthat's　my　uncle。　　The　woman　that　opened　the　lodge　gate　for　you　is　my　Aunt　Amelia。　　The　carroty…headed　young　man　that　answered　the　door　to　you　is　my　cousin　Simeon。　　He　always　used　to　insist　on　kissing　me。　　I'm　expecting　him　to　begin　again。　　My　〃lady's〃　maid　is　my　cousin　Jane。　　That's　why　I'm　dressed　like　this！　My　own　clothes　have　been　packed　off　to　the　local　dressmaker　to　be　made　〃decent。〃　　Meanwhile；　they've　dug　up　the　family　vault　to　find　something　for　me　to　go　on　with。　　＇He　has　been　fumbling　in　all　his　pockets　for　matches。　　She　snatches　a　box　from　somewhere　and　flings　it　to　him。＇　　For　Heaven's　sake　light　it！　　Then；　perhaps；　you'll　be　able　to　do　something　else　than　stare。　　I　have　claret　and　watermixed　with　my　dinner。　　Uncle　pours　it　out　for　me。　　They've　locked　up　my　cigarettes。　　Aunt　Susannah　is　coming　in　to…morrow　morning　to　hear　me　say　my　prayers。　　Doesn't　trust　me　by　myself。　　Thinks　I'll　skip　them。　She's　the　housekeeper　here。　　I've　got　to　know　them　by　heart　before　I　go　to　bed　to…night；　and　now　I've　mislaid　them。　　＇She　goes　to　the　deskhunts　for　them。＇

NEWTE　＇having　lighted　his　eternal　cigar；　he　can　begin　to　think＇。　　But　why　should　THEY　…

FANNY　＇still　at　desk＇。　　Because　they're　that　sort。　　They　honestly　think　they　are　doing　the　right　and　proper　thingthat　Providence　has　put　it　into　their　hands　to　turn　me　out　a　passable　substitute　for　all　a　Lady　Bantock　should　be；　which；　so　far　as　I　can　understand；　is　something　between　the　late　lamented　Queen　Victoria　and　Goody…Two…　Shoes。　　They　are　the　people　that　I　ran　away　from；　the　people　I've　told　you　about；　the　people　I've　always　said　I'd　rather　starve　than　ever　go　back　to。　　And　here　I　am；　plumped　down　in　the　midst　of　them　againfor　life！　　＇Honoria　Bennet；　the　〃still…room〃　maid；　has　entered。　　She　is　a　pert　young　minx　of　about　Fanny's　own　age。＇　　What　is　is？　　What　is　it？

HONORIA。　　Merely　passing　through。　　Sorry　to　have　excited　your　ladyship。　　＇Goes　into　dressing…room。＇

FANNY。　　My　cousin　Honoria。　　They've　sent　her　up　to　keep　an　eye　upon　me。　　Little　cat！　　＇She　takes　her　handkerchief；　drapes　it　over　the　keyhole　of　the　dressing…room　door。＇

NEWTE　＇at　sight　of　Honoria　he　has　jumped　up　and　hastily　hidden　his　cigar　behind　him＇。　　What　are　you　going　to　do？

FANNY　＇she　seats　herself　and　suggests　to　him　the　writing…chair＇。　Hear　from　youfirst　of　allexactly　what　you　told　Vernon。

NEWTE　＇sitting＇。　　About　you？

FANNY　＇nods＇。　　About　meand　my　family。

NEWTE。　　Wellcouldn't　tell　him　much；　of　course。　　Wasn't　much　to　tell。

FANNY。　　I　want　what　you　did　tell。

NEWTE。　　I　told　him　that　your　late　father　was　a　musician。

FANNY。　　Yes。

NEWTE。　　Had　been　unfortunate。　　Didn't　go　into　particulars。　　Didn't　seem　to　be　any　need　for　it。　　That　your　mother　had　died　when　you　were　still　only　a　girl　and　that　you　had　gone　to　live　with　relatives。　　＇He　looks　for　approval。＇

FANNY。　　Yes。

NEWTE。　　That　you　hadn't　got　on　well　with　themartistic　temperament；　all　that　sort　of　thingthat；　in　consequence；　you　had　appealed　to　your　father's　old　theatrical　friends；　and　that　theythat　they；　having　regard　to　your　talentand　beauty　…

FANNY。　　Thank　you。

NEWTE。　　Had　decided　that　the　best　thing　you　could　do　was　to　go　upon　the　stage。　　＇He　finishes；　tolerably　well　pleased　with　himself。＇

FANNY。　　That's　all　right。　　Very　good　indeed。　　What　else？

NEWTE　＇after　an　uncomfortable　pause＇。　　Well；　that's　about　all　I　knew。

FANNY。　　Yes；　but　what　did　you　TELL　him？

NEWTE。　　Well；　of　course；　I　had　to　tell　him　something。　　A　man　doesn't　marry　without　knowing　just　a　little　about　his　wife's　connections。　Wouldn't　be　reasonable　to　expect　him。　　You'd　never　told　me　anything　never　would；　except　that　you'd　liked　to　have　boiled　the　lot。　　What　was　I　to　do？　　＇He　is　playing　with　a　quill　pen　he　has　picked　up。＇

FANNY　＇she　takes　it　from　him＇。　　What　DID　you　do？

NEWTE　＇with　fine　frankness＇。　　I　did　the　best　I　could　for　you；　old　girl；　and　he　was　very　nice　about　it。　　Said　it　was　better　than　he'd　expected；　and　that　I'd　made　him　very　happyvery　happy　indeed。

FANNY　＇she　leans　across；　puts　her　hand　on　his＇。　　You're　a　dear；　good　fellow；　Georgealways　have　been。　　I　wouldn't　plague　you　only　it　is　absolutely　necessary　I　should　knowexactly　what　you　did　tell　him。

NEWTE　＇a　little　sulkily＇。　　I　told　him　that　your　uncle　was　a　bishop。

FANNY　＇sits　backstaring　at　him＇。　　A　what？

NEWTE。　　A　bishop。　　Bishop　of　Waiapu；　New　Zealand。

FANNY。　　Why　New　Zealand？

NEWTE。　　Why　not？　　Had　to　be　somewhere。　　Didn't　want　him　Archbishop　of　Canterbury；　did　you？

FANNY。　　Did　he　believe　it？

NEWTE。　　Shouldn't　have　told　him　had　there　been　any　fear　that　he　wouldn't。

FANNY。　　I　see。　　Any　other　swell　relations　of　mine　knocking　about？

NEWTE。　　Onea　judge　of　the　Supreme　Court　in　Ohio。　　Same　name；　anyhow；　O'Gorman。　　Thought　I'd　make　him　a　cousin　of　yours。　　I've　always　remembered　him。　　Met　him　when　I　was　over　there　in　ninety…　eightdamn　him！

A　silence。

FANNY　＇she　rises＇。　　Well；　nothing　else　for　it！　　Got　to　tell　him　it　was　all　a　pack　of　lies。　　Not　blaming　you；　old　boymy　fault。　　Didn't　know　he　was　going　to　ask　any　questions；　or　I'd　have　told　him　myself。　Bit　of　bad　luck；　that's　all。

NEWTE。　　Why　must　you　tell　him？　　Only　upset　him。

FANNY。　　It's　either　my　telling　him　or　leaving　it　for　them　to　do。　　You　know　me；　George。　　How　long　do　you　see　me　being　bossed　and　bullied　by　my　own　servants？　　Besides；　it's　bound　to　come　out　in　any　case。

NEWTE　＇he　rises。　　Kindly　but　firmly　he　puts　her　back　into　her　chair。　Then　pacing　to　and　fro　with　his　hands　mostly　in　his　trousers　pockets；　he　talks＇。　　Now；　you　listen　to　me；　old　girl。　　I've　been　your　business　manager　ever　since　you　started　in。　　I've　never　made　a　mistake　before…　…＇he　turns　and　faces　her＇and　I　haven't　made　one　this　time。

FANNY。　　I　don't　really　see　the　smartness；　George；　stuffing　him　up　with　a　lot　of　lies　he　can　find　out　for　himself。

NEWTE。　　IF　HE　WANTS　TO。　　A　couple　of　telegrams；　one　to　His　Grace　the　Bishop　of　Waiapu；　the　other　to　Judge　Denis　O'Gorman；　Columbus；　Ohio；　would　have　brought　him　back　the　information　that　neither　gentlemen　had　ever　heard　of　you。　　IF　HE　HADN'T　BEEN　CAREFUL　NOT　TO　SEND　THEM。　He　wasn't　marrying　you　with　the　idea　of　strengthening　his　family　connections。　　He　was　marrying　you　because　he　was　just　gone　on　you。　Couldn't　help　himself。

FANNY。　　In　that　case；　you　might　just　as　well　have　told　him　the　truth。

NEWTE。　　WHICH　HE　WOULD　THEN　HAVE　HAD　TO　PASS　ON　TO　EVERYONE　ENTITLED　TO　ASK　QUESTIONS。　　Can't　you　understand？　　Somebody；　in　the　interest　of　everybody；　had　to　tell　a　lie。　　Well；　what's　a　business　manager　for？

FANNY。　　But　I　can't　do　it；　George。　　You　don't　know　them。　　The　longer　I　give　in　to　them　the　worse　they'll　get。

NEWTE。　　Can't　you　square　them？

FANNY。　　No；　that's　the　trouble。　　They　ARE　honest。　　They're　the　〃faithful　retainers〃　out　of　a　melodrama。　　They　are　working　eighteen　hours　a　day　on　me　not　for　any　advantage　to　themselves；　but　because　they　think　it　their　〃duty〃　to　the　family。　　They　don't　seem　to　have　any　use　for　themselves　at　all。

NEWTE。　　Well；　what　about　the　boy？　　Can't　HE　talk　to　them？

FANNY。　　Vernon！　　They've　brought　him　up　from　a　babyspanked　him　all　round；　I　expect。　　Might　as　well　ask　a　boy　to　talk　to　his　old　schoolmaster。　　Besides；　if　he　did　talk；　then　it　would　all　come　out。　As　I　tell　you；　it's　bound　to　come　outand　the　sooner　the　better。

NEWTE。　　It　must　NOT　come　out！　　It's　too　late。　　If　we　had　told　him　at　the　beginning　that　he　was　proposing　to　marry　into　his　own　butler's　familywell；　it's　an　awkward　situationhe　might　have　decided　to　risk　it。　　Or　he　might　have　cried　off。

FANNY。　　And　a　good　job　if　he　had。

NEWTE。　　Now　talk　sense。　　You　wanted　himyou　took　a　fancy　to　him　from　the　beginning。　　He's　a　nice　boy；　and　there's　something　owing　to　him。　＇It　is　his　trump　card；　and　he　knows　it。＇　　Don't　forget　that。　　He's　been　busy；　explaining　to　all　his　friends　and　relations　why　they　should　receive　you　with　open　arms：　　really　nice　girl；　born　gentlewoman；　good　old　Church　of　England　familyno　objection　possible。　　For　you　to　spring　the　truth　upon　him　NOWwell；　it　doesn't　seem　to　me　quite　fair　to　HIM。

FANNY。　　Then　am　I　to　live　all　my　life　dressed　as　a　charity　girl？

NEWTE。　　You　keep　your　head　and　things　will　gradually　right　themselves。　　This　family　of　yoursthey've　got　SOME　sense；　I　suppose？

FANNY。　　Never　noticed　any　sign　of　it　myself。

NEWTE。　　Maybe　you're　not　a　judge。　　＇Laughs。＇　　They'll　listen　to　reason。　　You　let　ME　have　a　talk　to　them；　one　of　these　days；　see　if　I　can't　show　themfirst　one　and　then　the　otherthe　advantage　of　leaving　to　〃better〃　themselvesWITH　THE　HELP　OF　A　LITTLE　READY　MONEY。　　Later　onchoosing　your　proper　timeyou　can　break　it　to　him　that　you　have　discovered　they're　distant　connections　of　yours；　a　younger　branch　of　the　family　that　you'd　forgotten。　　Give　the　show　time　to　settle　down　into　a　run。　　Then　you　can　begin　to　make　changes。

FANNY。　　You've　a　wonderful　way　with　you；　George。　　It　always　sounds　right　as　you　put　iteven　when　one　jolly　well　knows　that　it　isn't。

NEWTE。　　Well；　it's　always　been　right　for　you；　old　girl；　ain't　it？

FANNY。　　Yes。　　You've　been　a　rattling　good　friend。　　＇She　takes　his　hands。＇　　Almost　wish　I'd　married　you　instead。　　We'd　have　been　more　suited　to　one　another。

NEWTE　＇shakes　his　head＇。　　Nothing　like　having　your　fancy。　　You'd　never　have　been　happy　without　him。　　＇He　releases　her。＇　　'Twas　a　good　engagement；　or　I'd　never　have　sanctioned　it。

FANNY。　　I　suppose　it　will　be　the　last　one　you　will　ever　get　me。　　＇She　has　dropped　for　a　moment　into　a　brown　study。＇

NEWTE　＇he　turns＇。　　I　hope　so。

FANNY　＇she　throws　off　her　momentary　mood　with　a　laugh＇。　　Poor　fellow！　You　never　even　got　your　commission。

NEWTE。　　I'll　take　ten　per　cent。　of　all　your　happiness；　old　girl。　　So　make　it　as　much　as　you　can　for　my　benefit。　　Good…bye。　　＇He　holds　out　hand。＇

FANNY。　　You're　not　going？　　You'll　stop　to　lunch？

NEWTE。　　Not　to…day。

FANNY。　　Do。　　If　you　don't；　they'll　think　it's　because　I　was　frightened　to　ask　you。

NEWTE。　　All　the　better。　　The　more　the　other　party　thinks　he's　having　his　way；　the　easier　always　to　get　your　own。　　Your　trouble　is；　you　know；　that　you　never　had　any　tact。

FANNY。　　I　hate　tact。　　＇Newte　laughs。＇　　We　could　have　had　such　a