the complete plays-及111何蛍
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!!!!隆堋響頼��紗秘慕禰厮宴和肝写偬堋響��
Now it is not easy to make a prisoner smile。 And it
should not be difficult to be a good jester�察�seeing
that thou are one。
POINT Difficult�拭�Nothing easier。 Nothing easier。 Attend�察�and
I will prove it to thee��
No。 14。 Oh� �a private buffoon is a light´hearted loon
��SONG��
Point
POINT Oh� �a private buffoon is a light´hearted loon��
If you listen to popular rumour��
From morning to night he's so joyous and bright��
And he bubbles with wit and good humour��
He's so quaint and so terse��
Both in prose and in verse��
Yet though people forgive his transgression��
There are one or two rules that all family fools
Must observe�察�if they love their profession。
There are one or two rules��
Half´a´dozen�察�maybe��
That all family fools��
Of whatever degree��
Must observe if they love their profession。
If you wish to succeed as a jester�察�you'll need
To consider each person's auricular��
What is all right for B would quite scandalize C
��For C is so very particular����
And D may be dull�察�and E's very thick skull
Is as empty of brains as a ladle��
While F is F sharp�察�and will cry with a carp��
That he's known your best joke from his cradle��
When your humour they flout��
You can't let yourself go��
And it does put you out
When a person says�察 �Oh��
I have known that old joke from my cradle� �
If your master is surly�察�from getting up early
��And tempers are short in the morning����
An inopportune joke is enough to provoke
Him to give you�察�at once�察�a month's warning。
Then if you refrain�察�he is at you again��
For he likes to get value for money��
He'll ask then and there�察�with an insolent stare��
;If you know that you're paid to be funny�拭�
It adds to the tasks
Of a merryman's place��
When your principal asks��
With a scowl on his face��
If you know that you're paid to be funny��
Comes a Bishop�察�maybe�察�or a solemn D。D。
Oh�察�beware of his anger provoking��
Better not pull his hair
Don't stick pins in his chair��
He won't understand practical joking。
If the jests that you crack have an orthodox smack��
You may get a bland smile from these sages��
But should it�察�by chance�察�be imported from France��
Half´a´crown is stopped out of your wages��
It's a general rule��
Tho' your zeal it may quench��
If the Family Fool
Makes a joke that's too French��
Half´a´crown is stopped out of his wages��
Though your head it may rack with a bilious attack��
And your senses with toothache you're losing��
And you're mopy and flat
they don't fine you for that
If you're properly quaint and amusing��
Though your wife ran away with a soldier that day��
And took with her your trifle of money��
Bless your heart�察�they don't mind
they're exceedingly kind
They don't blame youas long as you're funny��
It's a comfort to feel
If your partner should flit��
Though you suffer a deal��
They don't mind it a bit
They don't blame youso long as you're funny��
POINT And so thou wouldst be a jester eh��
WILFRED Aye��
POINT Now�察�listen� �My sweetheart�察�Elsie Maynard�察�was
secretly wed to this Fairfax half an hour ere he
escaped。
WILFRED She did well。
POINT She did nothing of the kind�察�so hold thy peace and
perpend。 Now�察�while he liveth she is dead to me and I
to her�察�and so�察�my jibes and jokes notwithstanding�察�I
am the saddest and the sorriest dog in England��
WILFRED Thou art a very dull dog indeed。
POINT Now�察�if thou wilt swear that thou didst shoot this
Fairfax while he was trying to swim across the river
it needs but the discharge of an arquebus on a dark
night and that he sank and was seen no more�察�I'll
make thee the very Archbishop of jesters�察�and that in
two days'time� �Now�察�what sayest thou��
WILFRED I am to lie��
POINT Heartily。 But thy lie must be a lie of circumstance��
which I will support with the testimony of eyes��
ears��and tongue。
WILFRED And thou wilt qualify me as a jester��
POINT As a jester among jesters。 I will teach thee all my
original songs�察�my self´constructed riddles�察�my own
ingenious paradoxes�察�nay�察�more�察�I will reveal to thee
the source whence I get them。 Now�察�what sayest thou��
WILFRED Why�察�if it be but a lie thou wantest of me�察�I hold it
cheap enough�察�and I say yes�察�it is a bargain��
No。 15。 Hereupon we're both agreed
��DUET��
Point and Wilfred
BOTH Hereupon we're both agreed��
All that we two
Do agree to
We'll secure by solemn deed��
To prevent all
Error mental。
POINT You on Elsie are to call
With a story
Grim and gory��
WILFRED How this Fairfax died�察�and all
I declare to
You're to swear to。
POINT I to swear to��
WILFRED I declare to��
POINT I to swear to��
WILFRED I declare to��
BOTH I to swear to��/I declare to��
You declare to��/You're to swear to��
I to swear to��/I declare to。
BOTH Tell a tale of cock and bull��
Of convincing detail full
Tale tremendous��
Heav'n defend us��
What a tale of cock and bull��
In return for your/my own part
You are/I am making�察�undertaking
To instruct me/you in the art
��Art amazing�察�wonder raising��
POINT Of a jester�察�jesting free。
Proud position
High ambition��
WILFRED And a lively one I'll be��
Wag´a´wagging��
Never flagging��
POINT Wag´a´wagging��
WILFRED Never flagging��
POINT Wag´a´wagging��
WILFRED Never flagging��
BOTH Never flagging��/Wag´a´wagging��
Wag´a´wagging��/Never flagging��
Never flagging��/Wag´a´wagging��
BOTH Tell a tale of cock and bull��
Of convincing detail full
Tale tremendous��
Heav'n defend us��
What a tale of cock and bull��
POINT What a tale of cock��
WILFRED What a tale of bull��
POINT What a tale of cock��
WILFRED What a tale of bull��
BOTH What a tale of cock and bull��
Cock and bull�察�cock and bull��
Heav'n defend us��
What a tale of cock and bull��
��Exeunt together。
��Enter FAIRFAX
FAIRFAX Two days gone�察�and no news of poor Fairfax。 The dolts��
They seek him everywhere save within a dozen yards of
his dungeon。 So I am free� �Free�察�but for the cursed
haste with which I hurried headlong into the bonds of
matrimony with Heaven knows whom� �As far as I
remember�察�she should have been young�察�but even had not
her face been concealed by her kerchief�察�I doubt
whether�察�in my then plight�察�I should have taken much
note of her。 Free�拭�Bah� �The Tower bonds were but a
thread of silk compared with these conjugal fetters
which I�察�fool that I was�察�placed upon mine own hands。
From the one I broke readily enough how to break the
other��
No。 16。 Free from his fetters grim
��BALLAD��
Fairfax
FAIRFAX Free from his fetters grim
Free to depart��
Free both in life and limb
In all but heart��
Bound to an unknown bride
For good and ill��
Ah�察�is not one so tied
A pris'ner still�察�a pris'ner still��
Ah�察�is not one so tied
A pris'ner still��
Free�察�yet in fetters held
Till his last hour��
Gyves that no smith can weld��
No rust devour��
Although a monarch's hand
Had set him free��
Of all the captive band
The saddest he�察�the saddest he��
Of