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service；　and　how　much　I　had　suffered　in　his　cause。　　I　found　by　my

first　reception　he　had　already　heard　of　my　success。　　Instead　of

thanking　me　for　my　speech；　he　said　the　city　should　repent　of

their　obstinacy；　for　that　he　would　show　them　who　he　was：　　and　so

saying；　he　immediately　turned　that　part　to　me　to　which　the　toe　of

man　hath　so　wonderful　an　affection；　that　it　is　very　difficult；

whenever　it　presents　itself　conveniently；　to　keep　our　toes　from

the　most　violent　and　ardent　salutation　of　it。



〃I　was　a　little　nettled　at　this　behavior；　and　with　some

earnestness　claimed　the　king's　fulfilling　his　promise；　but　he

retired　without　answering　me。　　I　then　applied　to　some　of　the

courtiers；　who　had　lately　professed　great　friendship　to　me；　had

eat　at　my　house；　and　invited　me　to　theirs：　　but　not　one　would

return　me　any　answer；　all　running　away　from　me　as　if　I　had　been

seized　with　some　contagious　distemper。　　I　now　found　by

experience；　that　as　none　can　be　so　civil；　so　none　can　be　ruder

than　a　courtier。



〃A　few　moments　after　the　king's　retiring　I　was　left　alone　in　the

room　to　consider　what　I　should　do　or　whither　I　should　turn

myself。　　My　reception　in　the　city　promised　itself　to　be　equal　at

least　with　what　I　found　at　court。　　However；　there　was　my　home；

and　thither　it　was　necessary　I　should　retreat　for　the　present。



〃But；　indeed；　bad　as　I　apprehended　my　treatment　in　the　city　would

be；　it　exceeded　my　expectation。　　I　rode　home　on　an　ambling　pad

through　crowds　who　expressed　every　kind　of　disregard　and

contempt；　pelting　me　not　only　with　the　most　abusive　language；　but

with　dirt。　　However；　with　much　difficulty　I　arrived　at　last　at　my

own　house；　with　my　bones　whole；　but　covered　over　with　filth。



〃When　I　was　got　within　my　doors；　and　had　shut　them　against　the

mob；　who　had　pretty　well　vented　their　spleen；　and　seemed　now

contented　to　retire；　my　wife；　whom　I　found　crying　over　her

children；　and　from　whom　I　had　hoped　some　comfort　in　my

afflictions；　fell　upon　me　in　the　most　outrageous　manner。　　She

asked　me　why　I　would　venture　on　such　a　step；　without　consulting

her；　she　said　her　advice　might　have　been　civilly　asked；　if　I　was

resolved　not　to　have　been　guided　by　it。　　That；　whatever　opinion　I

might　have　conceived　of　her　understanding；　the　rest　of　the　world

thought　better　of　it。　　That　I　had　never　failed　when　I　had　asked

her　counsel；　nor　ever　succeeded　without　it；with　much　more　of

the　same　kind；　too　tedious　to　mention；　concluding　that　it　was　a

monstrous　behavior　to　desert　my　party　and　come　over　to　the　court。



An　abuse　which　I　took　worse　than　all　the　rest；　as　she　had　been

constantly　for　several　years　assiduous　in　railing　at　the

opposition；　in　siding　with　the　court…party；　and　begging　me　to

come　over　to　it；　and　especially　after　my　mentioning　the　offer　of

knighthood　to　her；　since　which　time　she　had　continually

interrupted　my　repose　with　dinning　in　my　ears　the　folly　of

refusing　honors　and　of　adhering　to　a　party　and　to　principles　by

which　I　was　certain　of　procuring　no　advantage　to　myself　and　my

family。



〃I　had　now　entirely　lost　my　trade；　so　that　I　had　not　the　least

temptation　to　stay　longer　in　a　city　where　I　was　certain　of

receiving　daily　affronts　and　rebukes。　　I　therefore　made　up　my

affairs　with　the　utmost　expedition；　and；　scraping　together　all　I

could；　retired　into　the　country；　where　I　spent　the　remainder　of

my　days　in　universal　contempt；　being　shunned　by　everybody；

perpetually　abused　by　my　wife；　and　not　much　respected　by　my

children。



〃Minos　told　me；　though　I　had　been　a　very　vile　fellow；　he　thought

my　sufferings　made　some　atonement；　and　so　bid　me　take　the　other

trial。〃





CHAPTER　XXIV



Julian　recounts　what　happened　to　him　while　he　was　a　poet。



〃Rome　was　now　the　seat　of　my　nativity；　where　I　was　born　of　a

family　more　remarkable　for　honor　than　riches。　　I　was　intended　for

the　church；　and　had　a　pretty　good　education；　but　my　father　dying

while　I　was　young；　and　leaving　me　nothing；　for　he　had　wasted　his

whole　patrimony；　I　was　forced　to　enter　myself　in　the　order　of

mendicants。



〃When　I　was　at　school　I　had　a　knack　of　rhyming；　which　I　unhappily

mistook　for　genius；　and　indulged　to　my　cost；　for　my　verses　drew

on　me　only　ridicule；　and　I　was　in　contempt　called　the　poet。　



〃This　humor　pursued　me　through　my　life。　　My　first　composition

after　I　left　school　was　a　panegyric　on　pope　Alexander　IV；　who

then　pretended　a　project　of　dethroning　the　king　of　Sicily。　　On

this　subject　I　composed　a　poem　of　about　fifteen　thousand　lines；

which　with　much　difficulty　I　got　to　be　presented　to　his　holiness；

of　whom　I　expected　great　preferment　as　my　reward；　but　I　was

cruelly　disappointed：　　for　when　I　had　waited　a　year；　without

hearing　any　of　the　commendations　I　had　flattered　myself　with

receiving；　and　being　now　able　to　contain　no　longer；　I　applied　to

a　Jesuit　who　was　my　relation；　and　had　the　pope's　ear；　to　know

what　his　holiness's　opinion　was　of　my　work：　　he　coldly　answered

me　that　he　was　at　that　time　busied　in　concerns　of　too　much

importance　to　attend　the　reading　of　poems。



〃However　dissatisfied　I　might　be；　and　really　was；　with　this

reception；　and　however　angry　I　was　with　the　pope？　for　whose

understanding　I　entertained　an　immoderate　contempt；　I　was　not　yet

discouraged　from　a　second　attempt。　　Accordingly；　I　soon　after

produced　another　work；　entitled；　The　Trojan　Horse。　　This　was　an

allegorical　work；　in　which　the　church　was　introduced　into　the

world　in　the　same　manner　as　that　machine　had　been　into　Troy。　　The

priests　were　the　soldiers　in　its　belly；　and　the　heathen

superstition　the　city　to　be　destroyed　by　them。　　This　poem　was

written　in　Latin。　　I　remember　some　of　the　lines：

　Mundanos　scandit　fatalis　machina　muros；

　Farta　sacerdotum　turmis：　　exinde　per　alvum

　Visi　exire　omnes；　maguo　cum　murmure　olentes。

　Non　aliter　quam　cum　llumanis　furibundus　ab　antris

　It　sonus　et　nares　simul　aura　invadit　hiantes。

　Mille　scatent　et　mille　alii；　trepidare　timore

　Ethnica　gens　coepit：　　falsi　per　inane　volantes

　Effugere　DeiDesertaque　templa　relinquunt。

　Jam　magnum　crepitavit　equus；　mox　orbis　et　alti

　Ingemuere　poli：　　tunc　tu　pater；　ultimus　omnium

　Maxime　Alexander；　ventrem　maturus　equinum

　Deseris；　heu　proles　meliori　digne　parente。〃



I　believe　Julian；　had　I　not　stopped　him；　would　have　gone　through

the　whole　poem　（for；　as　I　observed　in　most　of　the　characters　he

related；　the　affections　he　had　enjoyed　while　he　personated　them

on　earth　still　made　some　impression　on　him）；　but　I　begged　him　to

omit　the　sequel　of　the　poem；　and　proceed　with　his　history。　　He

then　recollected　himself；　and；　smiling　at　the　observation　which

by　intuition　he　perceived　I　had　made；　continued　his　narration　as

follows：



〃I　confess　to　you；〃　says　he；　〃that　the　delight　in　repeating　our

own　works　is　so　predominant　in　a　poet；　that　I　find　nothing　can

totally　root　it　out　of　the　soul。　　Happy　would　it　be　for　those

persons　if　their　hearers　could　be　delighted　in　the　same　manner：

but　alas！　hence　that　ingens　solitudo　complained　of　by　Horace：　

for　the　vanity　of　mankind　is　so　much　greedier　and　more　general

than　their　avarice；　that　no　beggar　is　so　ill　received　by　them　as

he　who　solicits　their　praise。



〃This　I　sufficiently　experienced　in　the　character　of　a　poet；　for

my　company　was　shunned　（I　believe　on　this　account　chiefly）　by　my

whole　house：　　nay；　there　were　few　who　would　submit　to　hearing　me

read　my　poetry；　even　at　the　price　of　sharing　in　my　provisions。　

The　only　person　who　gave　me　audience　was　a　brother　poet；　he

indeed　fed　me　with　commendation　very　liberally：　　but；　as　I　was

forced　to　hear　and　commend　in　my　turn；　I　perhaps　bought　his

attention　dear　enough。　　



〃Well；　sir；　if　my　expectations　of　the　reward　I　hoped　from　my

first　poem　had　balked　me；　I　had　now　still　greater　reason　to

complain；　for；　instead　of　being　preferred　or　commended　for　the

second；　I　was　enjoined　a　very　severe　penance　by　my　superior；　for

ludicrously　comparing　the　pope　to　a　ft。　　My　poetry　was　now　the

jest　of　every　company；　except　some　few　who　spoke　of　it　with

detestation；　and　I　found　that；　instead　of　recommending　me　to

preferment；　it　had　effectually　barred　me　from　　all　probability　of

attaining　it。　　



〃These　discouragements　had　now　　induced　me　to　lay　down　my　pen　and

write　no　more。　　But；　as　Juvenal　says；

　　　　Si　discedas；　Laqueo　tenet　ambitiosi

　　　　Consuetudo　mali。



I　was　an　example　of　the　truth　of　this　assertion；　for　I　soon

betook　myself　again　to　my　muse。　　Indeed；　a　poet　hath　the　same

happiness　with　a　man　who　is　dotingly　fond　of　an　ugly　woman。　　The

one　enjoys　his　muse；　and　the　other　his　mistress；　with　a　pleasure

very　little　abated　by　the　esteem　of　the　world；　and　only

undervalues　their　taste　for　not　corresponding　with　his　own。



〃It　is　unnecessary　to　mention　any　more　of　my　poems；　they　had　all

the　same　fate；　and　though　in　reality　some　of　my　latter　pieces

deserved　（I　may　now　speak　it　without　the　imputation　of　vanity）　a

better　success；　as　I　had　the　character　of　a　bad　writer；　I　found

it　impossible　ever　to　obtain　the　reputation　of　a　good　one。　　Had　I

possessed　the　merit　of　Homer　I　could　have　hoped　for　no　applause；

since　it　must　have　been　a　profound　secret；　for　no　one　would　now

read　a　syllable　of　my　writings。　　



〃The　poets　of　my　age　were；　as　I　believe　you　know；　not　very

famous。　　However；　there　was　one　of　some　credit　at　that　time；

though　I　have　the　consolation　to　know　his　works　are　all　perished

long　ago。　　The　malice；　envy；　and　hatred　I　bore　this　man　are

inconceivable　to　any　but　an　author；　and　an　unsuccessful　one；　I

never　could　bear　to　hear　him　well　spoken　of；　and　writ　anonymous

satires　against　him；　though　I　had　received　obligations　from　him；

indeed　I　believe　it　would　have　been　an　absolute　impossibility　for

him　at　any　rate　to　have　made　me　sincerely　his　friend。



〃I　have　heard　an　observation　which　was　made　by　some　one　of　later

days；　that　there　are　no　worse　men　than　bad　authors。　　A　remar