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!!!!隆堋響頼��紗秘慕禰厮宴和肝写偬堋響��
threw myself upon the ground�察�and rolled upon it wild and
desperate�此 �Sometimes starting up�察�I returned to the door�察�again
strove to force it open�察�and repeated my fruitless cries for
succour。 Often was I on the point of striking my temple against
the sharp corner of some Monument�察�dashing out my brains�察�and
thus terminating my woes at once�察�But still the remembrance of my
Baby vanquished my resolution�此�I trembled at a deed which
equally endangered my Child's existence and my own。 Then would I
vent my anguish in loud exclamations and passionate complaints��
and then again my strength failing me�察�silent and hopeless I
would sit me down upon the base of St。 Clare's Statue�察�fold my
arms�察�and abandon myself to sullen despair。 Thus passed several
wretched hours。 Death advanced towards me with rapid strides��
and I expected that every succeeding moment would be that of my
dissolution。 Suddenly a neighbouring Tomb caught my eye�此 �A
Basket stood upon it�察�which till then I had not observed。 I
started from my seat�此 �I made towards it as swiftly as my
exhausted frame would permit。 How eagerly did I seize the
Basket�察�on finding it to contain a loaf of coarse bread and a
small bottle of water。
I threw myself with avidity upon these humble aliments。 They had
to all appearance been placed in the Vault for several days�察�The
bread was hard�察�and the water tainted�察�Yet never did I taste food
to me so delicious。 When the cravings of appetite were
satisfied�察�I busied myself with conjectures upon this new
circumstance�此�I debated whether the Basket had been placed there
with a view to my necessity。 Hope answered my doubts in the
affirmative。 Yet who could guess me to be in need of such
assistance�拭 �If my existence was known�察�why was I detained in
this gloomy Vault�拭 �If I was kept a Prisoner�察�what meant the
ceremony of committing me to the Tomb�拭 �Or if I was doomed to
perish with hunger�察�to whose pity was I indebted for provisions
placed within my reach�拭 �A Friend would not have kept my dreadful
punishment a secret�察�Neither did it seem probable that an Enemy
would have taken pains to supply me with the means of existence。
Upon the whole I was inclined to think that the Domina's designs
upon my life had been discovered by some one of my Partizans in
the Convent�察�who had found means to substitute an opiate for
poison�此�That She had furnished me with food to support me�察�till
She could effect my delivery�此 �And that She was then employed in
giving intelligence to my Relations of my danger�察�and pointing
out a way to release me from captivity。 Yet why then was the
quality of my provisions so coarse�拭 �How could my Friend have
entered the Vault without the Domina's knowledge�拭 �And if She had
entered�察�why was the Door fastened so carefully�拭 �These
reflections staggered me�此 �Yet still this idea was the most
favourable to my hopes�察�and I dwelt upon it in preference。
My meditations were interrupted by the sound of distant
footsteps。 They approached�察�but slowly。 Rays of light now
darted through the crevices of the Door。 Uncertain whether the
Persons who advanced came to relieve me�察�or were conducted by
some other motive to the Vault�察�I failed not to attract their
notice by loud cries for help。 Still the sounds drew near�此 �The
light grew stronger�此 �At length with inexpressible pleasure I
heard the Key turning in the Lock。 Persuaded that my deliverance
was at hand�察�I flew towards the Door with a shriek of joy。 It
opened�此 �But all my hopes of escape died away�察�when the Prioress
appeared followed by the same four Nuns�察�who had been witnesses
of my supposed death。 They bore torches in their hands�察�and
gazed upon me in fearful silence。
I started back in terror。 The Domina descended into the Vault��
as did also her Companions。 She bent upon me a stern resentful
eye�察�but expressed no surprize at finding me still living。 She
took the seat which I had just quitted�此�The door was again
closed�察�and the Nuns ranged themselves behind their Superior��
while the glare of their torches�察�dimmed by the vapours and
dampness of the Vault�察�gilded with cold beams the surrounding
Monuments。 For some moments all preserved a dead and solemn
silence。 I stood at some distance from the Prioress。 At length
She beckoned me to advance。 Trembling at the severity of her
aspect my strength scarce sufficed me to obey her。 I drew near��
but my limbs were unable to support their burthen。 I sank upon
my knees�察�I clasped my hands�察�and lifted them up to her for
mercy�察�but had no power to articulate a syllable。
She gazed upon me with angry eyes。
'Do I see a Penitent�察�or a Criminal��' She said at length�察�'Are
those hands raised in contrition for your crimes�察�or in fear of
meeting their punishment�拭 �Do those tears acknowledge the justice
of your doom�察�or only solicit mitigation of your sufferings�拭 �I
fear me�察�'tis the latter��'
She paused�察�but kept her eye still fixt upon mine。
'Take courage��' She continued�此 �'I wish not for your death�察�but
your repentance。 The draught which I administered�察�was no
poison�察�but an opiate。 My intention in deceiving you was to
make you feel the agonies of a guilty conscience�察�had Death
overtaken you suddenly while your crimes were still unrepented。
You have suffered those agonies�此 �I have brought you to be
familiar with the sharpness of death�察�and I trust that your
momentary anguish will prove to you an eternal benefit。 It is
not my design to destroy your immortal soul�察�or bid you seek the
grave�察�burthened with the weight of sins unexpiated。 No��
Daughter�察�far from it�此 �I will purify you with wholesome
chastisement�察�and furnish you with full leisure for contrition
and remorse。 Hear then my sentence�察�The ill´judged zeal of your
Friends delayed its execution�察�but cannot now prevent it。 All
Madrid believes you to be no more�察�Your Relations are thoroughly
persuaded of your death�察�and the Nuns your Partizans have
assisted at your funeral。 Your existence can never be suspected��
I have taken such precautions�察�as must render it an impenetrable
mystery。 Then abandon all thoughts of a World from which you are
eternally separated�察�and employ the few hours which are allowed
you�察�in preparing for the next。'
This exordium led me to expect something terrible。 I trembled��
and would have spoken to deprecate her wrath�此�but a motion of the
Domina commanded me to be silent。 She proceeded。
'Though of late years unjustly neglected�察�and now opposed by many
of our misguided Sisters�察。�whom Heaven convert�。� it is my
intention to revive the laws of our order in their full force。
That against incontinence is severe�察�but no more than so
monstrous an offence demands�此�Submit to it�察�Daughter�察�without
resistance�察�You will find the benefit of patience and resignation
in a better life than this。 Listen then to the sentence of St。
Clare。 Beneath these Vaults there exist Prisons�察�intended to
receive such criminals as yourself�此 �Artfully is their entrance
concealed�察�and She who enters them�察�must resign all hopes of
liberty。 Thither must you now be conveyed。 Food shall be
supplied you�察�but not sufficient for the indulgence of appetite�此�
You shall have just enough to keep together body and soul�察�and
its quality shall be the simplest and coarsest。 Weep�察�Daughter��
weep�察�and moisten your bread with your tears�此 �God knows that
you have ample cause for sorrow� �Chained down in one of these
secret dungeons�察�shut out from the world and light for ever�察�with
no comfort but religion�察�no society but repentance�察�thus must you
groan away the remainder of your days。 Such are St。 Clare's
orders�察�Submit to them without repining。 Follow me��'
Thunderstruck at this barbarous decree�察�my little remaining
strength abandoned me。 I answered only by falling at her feet��
and bathing them with tears。 The Domina�察�unmoved by my
affliction�察�rose from her seat with a stately air。 She repeated
her commands in an absolute tone�此 �But my excessive faintness
made me unable to obey her。 Mariana and Alix raised me from the
ground�察�and carried me forwards in their arms。 The Prioress
moved on�察�leaning upon Violante�察�and Camilla preceded her with a
Torch。 Thus passed our sad procession along the passages�察�in
silence only broken by my sighs and groans。 We stopped before
the principal shrine of St。 Clare。 The Statue was removed from
its Pedestal�察�though how I knew not。 The Nuns afterwards raised
an iron grate till then concealed by the Image�察�and let it fall
on the other side with a loud crash。 The awful sound�察�repeated
by the vaults above�察�and Caverns below me�察�rouzed me from the
despondent apathy in which I had been plunged。 I looked before
me�此 �An abyss presented itself to my affrighted eyes�察�and a steep
and narrow Staircase�察�whither my Conductors were leading me。 I
shrieked�察�and started back。 I implored compassion�察�rent the air
with my cries�察�and summoned both heaven and earth to my
assistance。 In vain� �I was hurried down the Staircase�察�and
forced into one of the Cells which lined the Cavern's sides。
My blood ran cold�察�as I gazed upon this melancholy abode。 The
cold vapours hovering in the air�察�the walls green with damp�察�the
bed of Straw so forlorn and comfortless�察�the Chain destined to
bind me for ever to my prison�察�and the Reptiles of every
description which as the torches advanced towards them�察�I
descried hurrying to their retreats�察�struck my heart with terrors
almost too exquisite for nature to bear。 Driven by despair to
madness�察�I burst suddenly from the Nuns who held me�此 �I threw
myself upon my knees before the Prioress�察�and besought her mercy
in the most passionate and frantic terms。
'If not on me��' said I�察�'look at least with pity on that innocent
Being�察�whose life is attached to mine� �Great is my crime�察�but
let not my Child suffer for it� �My Baby has committed no fault�此�
Oh� �spare me for the sake of my unborn Offspring�察�whom ere it
tastes life your severity dooms to destruction��'
The Prioress drew back haughtily�此 �She forced her habit from my
grasp�察�as if my touch had been contagious。
'What��' She exclaimed with an exasperated air�察�'What�拭 �Dare you
plead for the produce of your shame�拭 �Shall a Creature be
permitted to li