rj.thegreathunt-第46部分

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ne　thought　her　cheeks　were　wet；　though　she　hid　her　face　with　a　corner　of　her　blanket。　Lan　stood　watching　the　tent　from　the　darkness　for　a　long　time　before　he　went　away。　After　that　he　did　not　e　again。
　　　　　　　Moiraine　did　not　e　near　them；　giving　them　only　a　nod　in　passing。　She　seemed　to　spend　her　waking　hours　speaking　with　the　other　Aes　Sedai；　all　but　the　Red　sisters；　drawing　them　aside　one　by　one　as　they　rode。　The　Amyrlin　allowed　few　stops　for　rest；　and　those　short。
　　　　　　　〃Maybe　she　doesn't　have　time　for　us　anymore；〃　Egwene　observed　sadly。　Moiraine　was　the　one　Aes　Sedai　she　knew。　Perhaps　…　though　she　did　not　like　to　admit　it　…　the　only　one　she　was　sure　she　could　trust。　〃She　found　us；　and　we　are　on　our　way　to　Tar　Valon。　I　suppose　she　has　other　things　to　concern　her；　now。〃
　　　　　　　Nynaeve　snorted　softly。　〃I'll　believe　she　is　done　with　us　when　she's　dead　…　or　we　are。　She　is　sly；　that　one。〃
　　　　　　　Other　Aes　Sedai　came　to　their　tent。　Egwene　almost　jumped　out　of　her　skin　that　first　night　out　of　Fal　Dara；　when　the　tent　flap　was　pushed　aside　and　a　plump；　square…faced　Aes　Sedai；　with　graying　hair　and　a　vaguely　distracted　look　in　her　dark　eyes；　ducked　into　their　tent。　She　glanced　at　the　lantern　hanging　at　the　highest　point　of　the　tent；　and　the　flame　rose　a　little　higher。　Egwene　thought　she　felt　something；　thought　she　almost　saw　something　about　the　Aes　Sedai　when　the　flame　grew　brighter。　Moiraine　had　told　her　that　one　day　…　when　she　had　more　training　…　she　would　be　able　to　see　when　another　woman　channeled；　and　to　tell　a　woman　who　could　channel　even　if　she　did　nothing。
　　　　　　　〃I　am　Verin　Mathwin；〃　the　woman　said　with　a　smile。　〃And　you　are　Egwene　al'Vere　and　Nynaeve　al'Maera。　From　the　Two　Rivers；　which　was　once　Manetheren。　Strong　blood；　that。　It　sings。〃
　　　　　　　Egwene　exchanged　glances　with　Nynaeve　as　they　got　to　their　feet。
　　　　　　　〃Is　this　a　summons　to　the　Amyrlin　Seat？〃　Egwene　asked。
　　　　　　　Verin　laughed。　The　Aes　Sedai　had　a　smudge　of　ink　on　her　nose。　〃Oh；　my；　no。　The　Amyrlin　has　more　important　things　to　deal　with　than　two　young　women　who　are　not　even　novices　yet。　Although；　you　never　can　tell。　You　both　have　considerable　potential；　especially　you；　Nynaeve。　One　day　。。。〃　She　paused；　rubbing　a　finger　thoughtfully　right　atop　the　ink　smudge。　〃But　this　is　not　one　day。　I　am　here　to　give　you　a　lesson；　Egwene。　You　have　been　poking　in　ahead　of　yourself；　I　fear。〃
　　　　　　　Nervously；　Egwene　looked　at　Nynaeve。　〃What　have　I　done？　Nothing　that　I'm　aware　of。〃
　　　　　　　〃Oh；　nothing　wrong。　Not　exactly。　Somewhat　dangerous；　perhaps；　but　not　exactly　wrong。〃　Verin　lowered　herself　to　the　canvas　floor；　folding　her　legs　under　her。　〃Sit；　both　of　you。　Sit。　I　don't　mean　to　crane　my　neck。〃　She　shifted　around　until　she　had　a　fortable　position。　〃Sit。〃
　　　　　　　Egwene　settled　cross…legged　across　from　the　Aes　Sedai　and　did　her　best　not　to　look　at　Nynaeve。　No　need　to　look　guilty　until　I　know　if　I　am。　And　maybe　not　then。　〃What　is　it　I've　done　that's　dangerous　but　not　exactly　wrong？〃
　　　　　　　〃Why；　you've　been　channeling　the　Power；　child。〃
　　　　　　　Egwene　could　only　gape。　Nynaeve　burst　out；　〃That　is　ridiculous。　Why　are　we　going　to　Tar　Valon；　if　not　for　that？〃
　　　　　　　〃Moiraine　has　。。。　I　mean；　Moiraine　Sedai　has　been　giving　me　lessons；〃　Egwene　managed。
　　　　　　　Verin　held　up　her　hands　for　quiet；　and　they　fell　silent。　She　might　seem　vague；　but　she　was　Aes　Sedai；　after　all。　〃Child；　do　you　think　Aes　Sedai　immediately　teach　every　girl　who　says　she　wants　to　be　one　of　us　how　to　channel？　Well；　I　suppose　you　are　not　exactly　every　girl；　but　just　the　same　。。。〃　She　shook　her　head　gravely。
　　　　　　　〃Then　why　did　she？〃　Nynaeve　demanded。　There　had　been　no　lessons　for　her；　and　Egwene　was　still　not　sure　if　it　rankled　Nynaeve　or　not。
　　　　　　　〃Because　Egwene　had　already　channeled；〃　Verin　said　patiently。
　　　　　　　〃So　。。。　So　have　I。〃　Nynaeve　did　not　sound　happy　about　it。
　　　　　　　〃Your　circumstances　are　different；　child。　That　you　are　still　alive　shows　you　weathered　the　various　crises；　and　did　it　on　your　own。　I　think　you　know　how　lucky　you　are。　Of　every　four　women　forced　to　do　what　you　did；　only　one　survives。　Of　course；　wilders　…　〃　Verin　grimaced。　〃Forgive　me；　but　I　am　afraid　that　is　what　we　in　the　White　Tower　often　call　women　who；　without　any　training；　have　managed　some　rough　control　…　random；　and　barely　enough　to　be　called　control；　usually；　like　you；　but　still　control　of　a　sort。　Wilders　have　difficulties；　it　is　true。　Almost　always　they　have　built　up　walls　to　keep　themselves　from　knowing　what　it　was　they　were　doing；　and　those　walls　interfere　with　conscious　control。　The　longer　those　walls　have　to　build；　the　harder　it　is　to　tear　them　down；　but　if　they　can　be　demolished　…　well；　some　of　the　most　adept　sisters　ever　have　been　wilders。〃
　　　　　　　Nynaeve　shifted　irritably；　and　looked　at　the　entrance　as　if　thinking　of　leaving。
　　　　　　　〃I　don't　see　what　any　of　that　has　to　do　with　me；〃　Egwene　said。
　　　　　　　Verin　blinked　at　her；　almost　as　if　wondering　where　she　had　e　from。　〃With　you？　Why；　nothing。　Your　problem　is　quite　different。　Most　girls　who　want　to　bee　Aes　Sedai　…　even　most　girls　with　the　seed　inside　them；　like　you　…　are　afraid　of　it；　too。　Even　after　they　reach　the　Tower；　even　after　they've　learned　what　to　do　and　how；　for　months　they　need　to　be　led；　step　by　step；　by　a　sister；　or　by　one　of　the　Accepted。　But　not　you。　From　what　Moiraine　tells　me；　you　leaped　into　it　as　soon　as　you　knew　you　could；　fumbling　your　way　through　the　dark　with　never　a　thought　of　whether　there　was　a　bottomless　pit　under　your　next　step。　Oh；　there　have　been　others　like　you；　you　are　not　unique。　Moiraine　was　one　herself。　Once　she　knew　what　you　had　done；　there　was　nothing　for　it　but　for　her　to　begin　teaching　you。　Did　Moiraine　never　explain　any　of　this　to　you？〃
　　　　　　　〃Never。〃　Egwene　wished　her　voice　was　not　so　breathless。　〃She　had　。。。　other　matters　to　deal　with。〃　Nynaeve　snorted　softly。
　　　　　　　〃Well；　Moiraine　has　never　believed　in　telling　anyone　anything　they　did　not　need　to　know。　Knowing　serves　no　real　purpose；　but　then；　neither　does　not　knowing。　Myself；　I　always　prefer　knowing　to　not。〃
　　　　　　　〃Is　there　one？　A　pit；　I　mean？〃
　　　　　　　〃Obviously　not　so　far；〃　Verin　said；　tilting　her　head。　〃But　the　next　step？〃　She　shrugged。　〃You　see；　child；　the　more　you　try　to　touch　the　True　Source；　the　more　you　try　to　channel　the　One　Power；　the　easier　it　bees　to　actually　do　it。　Yes；　in　the　beginning；　you　stretch　out　to　the　Source　and　more　often　than　not　it　is　like　grasping　at　air。　Or　you　actually　to　channel　saidar；　but　even　when　you　feel　the　One　Power　flowing　through　you；　you　find　you　can　do　nothing　with　it。　Or　you　do　something；　and　it　isn't　what　you　intended　at　all。　That　is　the　danger。　Usually；　with　guidance　and　training　…　and　the　girl's　own　fear　slowing　her　down　…　the　ability　to　touch　the　Source　and　the　ability　to　channel　the　Power　e　together　with　the　ability　to　control　what　she　is　doing。　But　you　began　trying　to　channel　without　anyone　there　to　teach　you　any　control　at　all　of　what　you　do。　I　know　you　don't　think　you're　very　far　along；　and　you　are　not；　but　you　are　like　someone　who　has　taught　herself　to　run　up　hills　…　sometimes；　at　least　…　without　ever　learning　how　to　run　down　the　other　side；　or　to　walk。　Sooner　or　later　you　are　going　to　fall；　if　you　don't　learn　the　rest　of　it。　Now；　I　am　not　talking　about　anything　like　what　happens　when　one　of　those　poor　men　begins　channeling　…　you　will　not　go　mad；　you　won't　die；　not　with　sisters　to　teach　and　guide　you　…　but　what　might　you　do　entirely　by　accident；　never　meaning　to？〃　For　an　instant　the　vagueness　had　dropped　from　Verin's　eyes。　For　an　instant；　it　seemed；　the　Aes　Sedai's　gaze　had　flicked　from　Egwene　to　Nynaeve　as　sharply　as　the　Amyrlin's　had。　〃Your　innate　abilities　are　strong；　child；　and　they　will　grow　stronger。　You　must　learn　to　control　them　before　you　harm　yourself；　or　someone　else；　or　a　great　many　people。　That　is　what　Moiraine　was　trying　to　teach　you。　That　is　what　I　will　try　to　help　you　with　tonight；　and　what　a　sister　will　help　you　with　every　night　until　we　put　you　into　Sheriam's　most　capable　hands。　She　is　Mistress　of　Novices。〃
　　　　　　　Egwene　thought；　Can　she　know　about　Rand？　It　isn't　possible。　She'd　never　have　let　him　leave　Fal　Dara　if　she　even　suspected。　But　she　was　sure　she　had　not　imagined　what　she　saw。　〃Thank　you；　Verin　Sedai。　I　will　try。〃
　　　　　　　Nynaeve　rose　smoothly　to　her　feet。　〃I　will　go　sit　by　the　fire　and　leave　you　two　alone。〃
　　　　　　　〃You　should　stay；〃　Verin　said。　〃You　could　profit　by　it。　From　what　Moiraine　has　told　me；　it　should　take　only　a　little　training　for　you　to　be　raised　to　the　Accepted。〃
　　　　　　　Nynaeve　hesitated　only　a　moment　before　shaking　her　head　firmly。　〃I　thank　you　for　the　offer；　but　I　can　wait　until　we　reach　Tar　Valon。　Egwene；　if　you　need　me；　I　will　be　…　〃
　　　　　　　〃By　any　gauge；〃　Verin　cut　in；　〃you　are　a　woman　grown；　Nynaeve。　Usually；　the　younger　a　novice；　the　better　she　does。　Not　with　the　training　necessarily；　but　because　a　novice　is　expected　to　do　as　she　is　told；　when　she　is　told　and　without　question。　It　is　really　only　of　use　once　the　actual　training　has　reached　a　certain　point　…　a　hesitation　in　the　wrong　place　then；　or　a　doubt　of　what　you　have　been　told　to　do；　can　have　tragic　consequences　…　but　it　is　better　to　follow　the　discipline　all　the　time。　The　Accepted；　on　the　other　hand；　are　expected　to　question　things；　as　it　is　felt　they　know　enough　to　know　what　questions　to　ask　and　when。　Which　do　you　think　you　would　prefer？〃
　　　　　　　Nynaeve's　hands　tightened　on　her　skirt；　and　she　looked　at　the　tent　flap　again；　frowning。　Finally　she　gave　a　short　nod　and　settled　back　down　on　the　floor。　〃I　suppose　I　might　as　well；〃　she　said。
　　　　　　　〃Good；〃　Verin　said。　〃Now。　You　already　know　this　part；　Egwene；　but　for　Nynaeve's　sake　I　will　take　you　through　it　step　by　step。　In　time；　it　will　bee　second　nature　…　you　will　do　it　all　faster　than　you　can　think　of　it　…　but　now　it　is　best　to　go　slowly。　Close　your　eyes；　please。　It　goes　better　in　the　beginning　if　you　have　no　distractions　at　all。〃　Egwene　closed　her　eyes。　There　was　a　pause。　〃Nynaeve；〃　Verin　said；　〃please　close　your　eyes。　It　will　really　go　better。〃　Another　pause。　〃Thank　you；　child。　Now；　you　must　empty　yourself。　Empty　your　thoughts。　There　is　only　one　thing　in　your　mind。　The　bud　of　a　flower。　Only　that。　Only　the　bud。　You　can　see　it　in　every　detail。　You　can　smell　it。　You　can