cw.imarriedadeadman-第13部分

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　〃What　are　you　doing　out　of　the　office？〃
　〃I　was　on　my　way　back　just　now。　Had　to　go　over　and　see　a　man。　And　you？〃
　〃I　came　down　to　get　Mother　some　imported　English　yarn　she　had　waiting　for　her　at　Bloom's。　Before　they　send　it　out；　I　can　be　there　and　back　with　it。〃
　〃I'll　walk　with　you；〃　he　offered。　〃Good　excuse　to　loaf。　As　far　as　the　next　corner　anyhow。〃
　〃That's　where　I'm　taking　my　bus　anyway；〃　she　told　him。
　They　turned　and　resumed　their　course；　but　at　the　snail's　pace　she　had　been　maintaining　by　herself　before　now。
　He　crinkled　his　nose　and　squinted　upward　appreciatively。　〃It　does　a　fellow　good　to　get　out　in　the　sun　once　in　awhile。〃
　〃Poor　abused　man。　I'd　like　to　have　a　penny　for　every　time　you're　out　of　that　office　during　hours。〃
　He　chuckled　unabashedly。　〃Can　I　help　it　if　Dad　sends　me？　Of　course；　I　always　happen　to　get　right　in　front　of　him　when　he's　looking　around　for　someone　to　do　the　legwork。〃
　They　stopped。
　〃Those're　nice；〃　she　said　appraisingly。
　〃Yes；〃　he　agreed。　〃But　what　are　they？〃
　〃You　know　darned　well　they're　hats。　Don't　try　to　be　so　superior。〃
　They　went　on；　stopped　again。
　〃Is　this　what　they　call　window…shopping？〃
　〃This　is　what　they　call　window…shopping。　As　if　you　didn't　know。〃
　〃It's　fun。　You　don't　get　anywhere。　But　you　see　a　lot。〃
　〃You　may　like　it　now；　because　it's　a　novelty。　Wait　'll　you're　married　and　get　a　lot　of　it。　You　won't　like　it　then。〃
　The　next　window…display　was　an　offering　of　fountain　pens；　a　narrow　little　show…case　not　more　than　two　or　three　yards　in　width。
　She　didn't　offer　to　stop　there。　It　was　now　he　who　did；　halting　her　with　him　as　a　result。
　〃Wait　a　minute。　That　reminds　me。　I　need　a　new　pen。　Will　you　e　in　with　me　a　minute　and　help　me　pick　one　out？〃
　〃I　ought　to　be　getting　back；〃　she　said　halfheartedly。
　〃It'll　only　take　a　minute。　I'm　a　quick　buyer。〃
　〃I　don't　know　anything　about　pens；〃　she　demurred。
　〃I　don't　myself。　That's　just　it。　Two　heads　are　better　than　one。〃　He'd　taken　her　lightly　by　the　arm　by　now；　to　try　to　induce　her。　〃Ah；　e　on。　I'm　the　sort　they　sell　anything　to　when　I'm　alone。〃
　〃I　don't　believe　a　word　of　it。　You　just　want　pany；〃　she　laughed；　but　she　went　inside　with　him　nevertheless。
　He　offered　her　a　chair　facing　the　counter。　A　case　of　pens　was　brought　out　and　opened。　They　were　discussed　between　him　and　the　salesman；　she　taking　no　active　part。　Several　were　uncapped；　filled　at　a　waiting　bottle　of　ink　at　hand　on　the　counter；　and　tried　out　on　a　pad　of　scratch…paper；　also　at　hand　for　that　purpose。
　She　looked　on；　trying　to　show　an　interest　she　did　not　really　feel。
　Suddenly　he　said　to　her；　〃How　do　you　like　the　way　this　writes？〃　and　thrust　one　of　them　between　her　fingers　and　the　block　of　paper　under　her　hand；　before　she　quite　knew　what　had　happened。
　Incautiously；　her　mind　on　the　proportions　and　weight　of　the　barrel　in　her　grasp；　her　attention　fixed　on　what　sort　of　a　track　the　nib　would　leave；　whether　a　broad　bold　one　or　a　thin　wiry　one；　she　put　it　to　the　pad。　Suddenly　〃Helen〃　stood　there　on　the　topmost　leaf；　almost　as　if　produced　by　automatic　writing。　Or　rather；　in　the　fullest　sense　of　the　word；　it　was　just　that。　She　checked　herself　just　in　time　to　prevent　the　second　name　from　flowing　out　of　the　pen。　It　was　already　on　the　preliminary　upward　stroke　of　a　capital　G；　when　she　jerked　it　clear。
　〃Here；　let　me　try　it　a　minute　myself。〃　Without　warning　he'd　taken　both　pen　and　pad　back　again；　before　she　could　do　anything　to　obliterate　or　alter　what　was　on　it。
　Whether　he　saw　it　or　not　she　couldn't　tell。　He　gave　no　indication。　Yet　it　was　right　there　under　his　eyes；　he　must　have；　how　could　he　have　failed　to？
　He　drew　a　cursory　line　or　two；　desisted。
　〃No；〃　he　said　to　the　salesman。　〃Let　me　see　that　one。〃
　While　he　was　reaching　into　the　case；　she　managed　to　deftly　peel　off　the　topmost　leaf　with　that　damaging　〃Helen〃　on　it。　Crumpled　it　surreptitiously　in　her　hand；　dropped　it　to　the　floor。
　And　then；　belatedly；　realized　that　perhaps　this　was　even　worse　than　had　she　left　it　on　there　where　it　was。　For　surely　he'd　seen　it　anyway；　and　now　she'd　only　pointed　up　the　fact　that　she　did　not　want　him　to。　In　other　words；　she'd　doubly　damned　herself；　first　by　the　error；　then　by　taking　such　pains　to　try　to　efface　it。
　Meanwhile；　his　interest　in　the　matter　of　pens　had　all　at　once　flagged。　He　looked　at　the　clerk；　about　to　speak；　and　she　could　have　almost　predicted　what　he　was　about　to　say…had　he　said　it…his　expression　conveyed　it　so　well。　〃Never　mind。　I'll　stop　in　again　some　other　time。〃　But　then　instead　he　gave　her　a　look；　and　as　though　recalled　to　the　necessity　for　maintaining　some　sort　of　plausibility；　said　hurriedly；　almost　indifferently；　〃All　right；　here；　make　it　this　one。　Send　it　over　to　my　office　later　on。〃
　He　scarcely　looked　at　it。　It　didn't　seem　to　matter　to　him　which　one　he　took。
　And；　she　reminded　herself；　after　making　such　to…do　about　her　ing　in　with　him　to　help　him　select　one。
　〃Shall　we　go？〃　he　said；　a　trifle　reticently。
　Their　parting　was　strained。　She　didn't　know　whether　it　was　due　to　him　or　due　to　herself。　Or　just　due　to　her　own　imagining。　But　it　seemed　to　her　to　lack　the　jaunty　spontaneity　of　their　meeting　just　a　few　minutes　ago。
　He　didn't　thank　her　for　helping　him　select　a　pen；　and　she　was　grateful　for　that　at　least。　But　his　eyes　were　suddenly　remote；　abstracted；　where　until　now　they　had　been　wholly　on　her　at　every　turn　of　speech。　They　seemed　to　be　looking　up　this　way　toward　the　top　of　a　building；　looking　down　that　way　toward　the　far　end　of　the　street；　looking　everywhere　but　at　her　any　more；　even　while　he　was　saying　〃Here's　your　bus；〃　and　arming　her　into　it；　and　reaching　in　from　where　he　stood　to　pay　the　driver　her　fare。　〃Goodbye。　Get　home　all　right　See　you　tonight。〃　And　tipped　his　hat；　and　seemed　to　have　already　forgotten　her　even　before　he　had　pleted　the　act　of　turning　away　and　going　about　his　business。　And　yet　somehow　she　knew　that　just　the　reverse　was　true。　That　he　was　more　conscious　of　her　than　ever；　now　that　he　seemed　least　so。　Distance　had　intervened　between　them；　that　was　all。
　She　looked　down　at　her　lap；　while　the　bus　swept　her　along　past　the　crowded　sidewalks。　Funny　how　quickly　a　scene　could　change；　the　same　scene；　the　sunlit　pavements　and　the　bustling　shoppers　weren't　fun　any　more　to　watch。
　If　it　had　been　a　premeditated　test；　a　trap…　But　no；　it　couldn't　have　been　that。　That　much　at　least　she　was　sure　of；　though　it　was　no　satisfaction。　He　couldn't　have　known　that　he　was　going　to　run　into　her　just　where　he　had；　that　they　were　going　to　walk　along　just　as　they　had；　toward　that　pen　emporium。　At　the　time　he'd　left　the　house　this　morning；　she　hadn't　even　known　herself　that　she　was　ing　downtown　like　this；　that　had　e　up　later。　So　he　couldn't　have　lain　in　wait　for　her　there；　to　accost　her。　That　much　at　least　had　been　spontaneous；　purely　accidental。
　But　maybe　as　they　were　strolling　along；　and　he　first　looked　up　and　saw　the　store　sign；　that　was　when　it　had　occurred　to　him；　and　he'd　improvised　it；　on　the　spur　of　the　moment。　What　was　monly　said　must　have　occurred　to　him　then；　as　it　only　occurred　to　her　now。　That　when　people　try　out　a　new　pen；　they　invariably　write　their　real　names。　It's　almost　pulsory。
　And　yet；　even　for　such　an　undeliberated；　on…the…spot　test　as　that；　there　must　have　been　some　formless　suspicion　of　her　already　latent　in　his　mind；　in　one　way　or　another；　or　it　wouldn't　have　suggested　itself　to　him。
　Little　fool；　she　said　to　herself　bitterly　as　she　tugged　at　the　overhead　cord　and　prepared　to　alight；　why　didn't　you　think　of　that　before　you　went　in　there　with　him？　What　good　was　hindsight　now？
　A　night　or　two　later　his　discarded　coat　was　slung　over　a　chair　and　be　wasn't　in　the　room　with　it　at　the　moment。　She　needed　a　pencil　for　something　for　a　moment　anyhow；　that　was　her　excuse　for　it。　She　sought　the　pocket　and　took　out　the　fountain　pen　she　found　clasped　to　it　It　was　gold　and　had　his　initials　engraved　on　it；　some　valued；　long…used　birthday　or　Christmas　present　from　one　of　his　parents　probably。　Moreover；　it　was　in　perfect　writing　order；　couldn't　have　been　improved　on；　left　a　clear；　deep；　rich　trace。　And　he　wasn't　the　sort　of　man　who　went　around　displaying　two　fountain　pens　at　a　time。
　It　had　been　a　test；　all　right。　And　she　had　given　a　positive　reaction；　as　positive　as　he　could　have　hoped　for。
　
　
　22
　
　She'd　heard　the　doorbell　ring　some　time　before；　and　dim　sounds　of　conglomerate　greeting　follow　it　in　the　hall　below；　and　knew　by　that　some　visitor　must　have　arrived；　and　must　still　be　down　there。　She　didn't　think　any　more　about　it　She'd　had　Hughie　in　his　little　portable　tub　at　the　moment；　and　that；　while　it　was　going　on；　was　a　full…time　job　for　anyone's　attention。　By　the　time　she'd　finished　drying　and　talcuming　and　dressing　him；　putting　him　to　bed　for　the　night；　and　then　lingering　treacherously　by　him　awhile　longer；　to　watch　her　opportunity　and　worm　the　last　celluloid　bath…duck　out　of　his　tightly　closed　little　fist；　the　better　part　of　an　hour　had　gone　by。　She　felt　sure　the　caller；　whoever　he　was；　must　already　be　long　gone　by　that　time。　That　it　had　been　a　masculine　visitor　was　something　she　could　take　for　granted；　anyone　feminine　from　six　to　sixty　would　automatically　have　been　ushered　upstairs　by　the　idolatrous　Mother　Hazzard　to　look　in　on　the　festive　rite　of　her　grandson's　bath。　In　fact　it　was　the　first　time　she　herself　had　missed　attending　one　in　weeks；　if　only　to　hold　the　towel；　prattle　in　an　unintelligible　gibberish　with　the　small　person　in　the　tub；　and　generally　get　in　the　unplaining　mother's　way。　Only　something　of　importance　could　have　kept　her　away。
　She　thought　they　were　being　unusually　quiet　below；　when　she　finally　came　out　of　her　room　and　started　down　the　stairs。　There　was　a　single；　droning；　low…pitched　voice　going　on；　as　if　somebody　were　reading　aloud；　and　no　one　else　was　audible。
　They　were　all　in　the　library；　she　discovered　a　moment　later；　a　room　that　was　never　used　much　in　the　evenings。　And　when　it　was；　never　by　all　of　them　together；　at　one　time。　She　could　see　them　in　there　twice　over；　the　first　time　from　the　stairs　themselves；　as　she　came　down　them；　and　then　in　an　afterglimpse；　through　the　open　doorway　at　nearer　range；　as　she　doubled　back　around　the　foot　of　the　stairs　and