anner.vittoriothevampire-第12部分

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t　your　solemn　permission。〃
　〃Yes；　I　know　all　that；〃　I　said。　〃What　good　will　this　do？　Let　me　see　this　Pastor。〃
　Now　I　was　being　too　haughty　entirely；　too　impertinent。　I　was　exhausted。　I　was　doing　the　old　Signore　trick　of　treating　a　country　priest　like　he　was　a　servant。　This　was　a　man　of　God；　and　I　had　to　get　a　grip　on　myself。　Maybe　the　Pastor　had　read　more；　understood　more。　Oh；　but　who　would　understand　who　had　not　seen？　There　came　back　to　me　a　fleeting　yet　vivid　and　searing　memory　of　my　father's　anxious　face　on　the　night　before　the　demons　had　struck。　The　pain　was　inexpressible。
　〃I'm　sorry；　Father；〃　I　said　to　the　priest。　I　winced；　trying　to　contain　this　memory；　this　awful　drench　of　misery　and　hopelessness。　I　wondered　why　any　of　us　were　alive；　ever；　for　any　reason！
　And　then　the　words　of　my　exquisite　tormentor　came　back；　her　own　tortured　voice　of　the　last　night　saying　that　she　had　been　young　too；　and　such　a　paragon。　What　had　she　meant；　speaking　of　herself　with　such　sorrow？
　My　study　of　Aquinas　came　back　to　haunt　me。　Were　not　demons　supposed　to　remain　absolutely　confirmed　in　their　hatred　of　us？　In　the　pride　which　had　made　them　sin？
　That　was　not　the　sinuous　luscious　creature　who　had　e　to　me。　But　this　was　folly。　I　was　feeling　for　her；　which　is　what　she　had　wanted　me　to　do。　I　had　only　so　many　hours　of　daylight　to　plan　her　destruction　and　must　be　on　with　it。
　〃Please；　yes；　Father；　as　you　wish；〃　I　said。　〃But　bless　me　first。〃
　This　drew　him　out　of　his　troubled　ruminations。　He　looked　at　me　as　if　I'd　startled　him。　At　once　he　gave　his　blessing　and　his　absolution。
　〃You　can　do　what　you　wish　with　the　Pastor；〃　I　said。　〃Yes；　please；　ask　the　Pastor　if　he　will　see　me。　And　here；　for　the　church。〃　I　gave　him　several　ducats。
　He　stared　at　the　money。　But　he　didn't　touch　it。　He　stared　at　this　gold　as　if　it　were　hot　coals。
　〃Father；　take　it。　This　is　a　tidy　little　fortune。　Take　it。〃
　〃No；　you　wait　here　…　or　I　tell　you　what；　you　e　out　into　the　garden。〃
　The　garden　was　lovely；　a　little　old　grotto；　from　which　you　could　see　the　town　sneaking　up　on　the　right　all　the　way　to　the　castle；　and　then　you　could　see　over　the　walls　far　out　over　the　mountains。　There　was　an　antique　statue　of　St。　Dominic　there；　a　fountain　and　a　bench；　and　some　old　words　carved　into　the　stone　about　a　miracle。
　I　sat　down　on　the　bench。　I　looked　up　at　the　healthy　blue　sky　and　the　virgin　white　clouds；　and　I　tried　to　catch　my　breath　inside　of　myself。　Could　I　be　mad？　I　wondered。　That　was　ridiculous。
　The　Pastor　startled　me。　He　came　plunging　out　of　the　low　arched　doorway　of　the　rectory；　an　elderly　man　with　almost　no　hair　at　all；　and　a　small　bulging　nose　and　ferocious　large　eyes。　The　younger　priest　was　running　to　keep　up　with　him。
　〃Get　out　of　here；〃　the　Pastor　said　to　me　in　a　whisper。　〃Get　out　of　our　town。　Get　clear　away　from　it；　and　don't　tell　your　stories　to　anybody　in　it；　you　hear　me？〃
　〃What？〃　I　asked。　〃What　sort　of　solace　is　this！〃　He　was　steaming。　〃I'm　warning　you。〃
　〃Warning　me　of　what？〃　I　demanded。　I　didn't　bother　to　get　up　from　the　bench。　He　glowered　over　me。　〃You're　under　the　Seal　of　Confession。　What　are　you　going　to　do　if　I　don't　leave？〃　I　asked。
　〃I　don't　have　to　do　anything；　that's　just　it！〃　he　said。　〃Go　away　and　take　your　misery　with　you。〃　He　stopped；　clearly　at　a　loss；　embarrassed　perhaps；　as　if　he'd　said　something　he　regretted。　He　ground　his　teeth　and　looked　off　and　then　back　at　me。
　〃For　your　own　sake；　leave；〃　he　said　in　a　whisper。　He　looked　at　the　other　priest。　〃You　go；〃　he　said；　〃and　let　me　talk　to　him。〃
　The　young　priest　was　in　a　total　fright。　He　left　immediately。　I　looked　up　at　the　Pastor。
　〃Leave；〃　he　said　to　me　in　his　low；　mean　voice；　his　lower　lip　drawing　back　to　reveal　his　lower　teeth。　〃Get　out　of　our　town。　Get　out　of　Santa　Maddalana。〃
　I　looked　at　him　with　cold　contempt。　〃You　know　about　them；　don't　you？〃　I　said　in　a　low　voice。
　〃You're　mad。　Mad！〃　he　said。　〃If　you　speak　of　demons　to　people　here　you'll　end　up　burnt　at　the　stake　yourself　for　a　sorcerer。　You　think　it　can't　happen？〃　It　was　hatred　in　his　eyes；　shameless　hatred。
　〃Oh；　poor　damned　priest；〃　I　said；　〃you're　in　league　with　the　Devil。〃
　〃Get　out！〃　he　growled。
　I　got　up　and　looked　down　into　his　swelling　eyes；　his　pouting；　overworked　mouth。
　〃Don't　you　dare　break　the　Seal　of　my　Confession；　Father；〃　I　said。　〃If　you　do；　I'll　kill　you。〃　He　stood　stock…still；　staring　at　me。
　I　smiled　very　coldly　and　went　to　pass　on　through　the　rectory　and　away。
　He　ran　after　me；　whispering　like　a　steaming　kettle。　〃You　misunderstand　everything。　You're　crazy；　you're　imagining　things。　I'm　trying　to　save　you　from　persecution　and　villainization。〃
　I　turned　around　at　the　door　to　the　church　and　glared　him　into　utter　silence。
　〃You've　tipped　your　hand；〃　I　said。　〃You're　too　merciless。　Remember　what　I　said。　Break　the　Seal　and　I'll　kill　you。〃
　He　was　as　frightened　now　as　the　young　priest　had　been。
　I　stood　looking　at　the　altar　for　a　long　while；　ignoring　him；　forgetting　him　utterly；　my　mind　pretending　to　have　thoughts　in　it；　to　be　construing　and　planning　when　all　I　could　do　was　endure。　Then　I　made　the　Sign　of　the　Cross　and　I　left　the　church。　I　was　in　utter　despair。
　For　a　while　I　walked　around。　Once　again；　it　was　only　the　most　pleasant　town　I　had　ever　seen；　with　everyone　happily　at　work；　with　best…swept　cobbled　streets；　and　pretty　flower　boxes　under　all　the　windows；　and　prettily　dressed　people　going　about　their　affairs。
　It　was　the　cleanest　place　I'd　ever　seen　in　my　life；　and　the　most　contented。　And　the　people；　they　were　all　eager　to　sell　me　their　wares；　but　they　didn't　press　it　terribly　much。　But　it　was　an　awfully　dull　town　in　a　way。　There　were　no　people　my　age；　none　at　all　that　I　saw。　In　fact；　there　weren't　all　that　many　children。
　What　should　I　do？　Where　should　I　go？　What　was　I　looking　for？
　I　didn't　quite　know　how　to　answer　my　own　questions；　but　I　was　certainly　on　my　guard　for　the　slightest　evidence　that　this　town　somehow　harbored　the　demons；　that　Ursula　had　not　found　me　here；　but　that　I　had　found　her。
　The　mere　thought　of　her　overcame　me　with　a　cool；　inviting　shock　of　desire。　I　saw　her　breasts；　felt　the　taste　of　her；　saw　in　a　blurred　flash　the　flowered　meadow。　No！
　Think。　Make　some　plan。　As　for　this　town；　no　matter　what　the　priest　knew；　these　people　were　too　wholesome　for　harboring　demons。
　
　
　5
　THE　PRICE　OF　PEACE　AND　THE　PRICE　OF　VENGEANCE
　
　AS　the　heat　of　the　day　started　to　really　rise；　I　went　into　the　arbor　of　the　Inn　for　the　heavy　noon　meal　and　sat　down　by　myself　under　the　wisteria；　which　was　blooming　magnificently　over　the　latticework。　This　place　was　on　the　same　side　of　the　town　as　the　Dominican　church；　and　it　too　had　a　lovely　view　of　the　town　to　the　left　and　a　view　out　over　the　mountains。
　I　closed　my　eyes；　and　putting　my　elbows　on　the　table；　I　clasped　my　hands　and　I　prayed。　〃God；　tell　me　what　to　do。　Show　me　what　is　to　be　done。〃　And　then　I　was　quiet　in　my　heart；　waiting；　thinking。　What　were　my　choices？
　Take　this　tale　to　Florence？　Who　would　believe　it？　Go　to　Cosimo　himself　and　tell　him　this　story？　Much　as　I　admired　and　trusted　the　Medici；　I　had　to　realize　something。　Nobody　of　my　family　was　living　but　me。　I　alone　could　lay　claim　to　our　fortunes　in　the　Medici　bank。　I　didn't　think　Cosimo　would　deny　my　signature　or　my　face。　He'd　give　over　to　me　what　was　mine；　whether　I　had　kinsmen　or　not；　but　a　story　of　demons？　I'd　wind　up　locked　up　somewhere　in　Florence！
　And　talk　of　the　stake；　of　being　burnt　for　a　sorcerer；　that　was　entirely　possible。　Not　likely。　But　possible。　It　could　happen　very　suddenly　and　spontaneously　in　a　town　like　this；　a　mob　gathering；　denunciations　by　a　local　priest；　people　shouting　and　running　to　see　what　was　up。　This　did　now　and　then　happen　to　people。
　About　this　time；　my　meal　was　set　out　for　me；　a　good　meal　with　plenty　of　fresh　fruit　and　well…cooked　mutton　and　gravy；　and　as　I　started　to　dip　my　bread　and　eat；　up　came　two　men　who　asked　to　sit　down　with　me　and　buy　a　cup　of　wine　for　me。
　I　realized　one　of　them　was　a　Franciscan；　a　very　kindly…looking　priest；　poorer　it　seemed　than　the　Dominicans；　which　was　logical　I　suppose；　and　the　other　an　elderly　man　with　little　twinkling　eyes　and　long　stiff　white　eyebrows；　sticking　up　as　if　with　glue；　as　if　he　were　costumed　as　a　cheerful　elf　to　delight　children。
　〃We　saw　you　go　in　to　the　Dominicans；〃　said　the　Franciscan　quietly　and　politely　and　smiling　at　me。　〃You　didn't　look　so　happy　when　you　came　out。〃　He　winked。　〃Why　don't　you　try　us？〃　Then　he　laughed。　It　was　no　more　than　a　good…natured　joke　and　I　knew　it；　about　the　rivalry　of　the　two　orders。　〃You're　a　fine…looking　young　man；　you　e　from　Florence？〃　he　asked。
　〃Yes；　Father；　traveling；〃　I　said；　〃though　where　exactly；　I　don't　know。　I'm　stopped　here　for　a　while；　I　think。〃　I　was　talking　with　my　mouth　full；　but　I　was　too　hungry　to　stop。　〃Sit　down；　please。〃　I　started　to　rise；　but　they　sat　down。
　I　bought　another　pitcher　of　red　wine　for　the　table。
　〃Well；　you　couldn't　have　found　a　finer　place；〃　said　the　little　old　man；　who　seemed　to　have　his　wits　about　him；　〃that　is　why　I　am　so　happy　that　God　sent　my　own　son；　back　here；　to　serve　in　our　church；　so　that　he　could　live　out　his　days　by　his　family。〃
　〃Ah；　so　you　are　father　and　son；〃　I　said。
　〃Yes；　and　I　never　thought　I'd　live　so　long；〃　said　the　father；　〃to　see　such　prosperity　e　to　this　town　as　has　e。　It's　miraculous。〃
　〃It　is；　it　is　the　blessing　of　God；〃　said　the　priest　innocently　and　sincerely。　〃It's　a　true　wonder。〃
　〃Oh；　really；　instruct　me　in　this；　how　so？〃　I　asked。　I　pushed　the　plate　of　fruit　to　them。　But　they　said　they　had　eaten。
　〃Well；　in　my　time；〃　said　the　father；　〃you　know　we　had　more　than　our　share　of　woes；　or　that's　how　it　seemed　to　me。　But　now？　It's　utter　bliss；　this　place。　Nothing　bad　ever　happens。〃
　〃It's　true；〃　said　the　priest。　〃You　know；　I　remember　the　lepers　we　had　in　the　old　days；　who　lived　outside　the　walls。　They　are　all　gone　now。　And　then　there　were　always　a　few　really　bad　youths；　young　men　causing　trouble；　you　know；　the　really　bad　sort。　You　had　them　in　every　town。　But　now？　You　couldn't　find　one　bad　man　in　all　of　Santa　Maddalana　or　in　any　of　the　villages　around。　It's　as　if　people　have　returned　to　God　with　their　whole　hearts。〃
　〃Yes；〃　said　the　old　elfin　man；　shaking　his　head；　〃