dk.coldfire-第43部分

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on。　
　As　the　clerk　finished　filling　out　the　credit…card　form；　Holly　considered　phoning　her　parents　in　Philadelphia　to　let　them　know　where　she　was　going　and　with　whom。　But　she　would　only　alarm　them　and　be　on　the　phone　half　an　hour　trying　to　reassure　them　that　she　was　going　to　be　just　fine。　
　Besides；　she　had　already　decided　that　the　darkness　in　Jim　was　less　important　than　the　light；　and　she　had　made　a　mitment　to　him。　If　he　occasionally　made　her　uneasy。　。　。　well；　that　was　part　of　what　had　drawn　her　to　him　in　the　first　place。　A　sense　of　danger　sharpened　the　edge　of　his　appeal。　At　heart；　he　was　a　good　man。　
　It　was　foolish　to　worry　about　her　safety　after　she　had　already　made　love　to　him。　For　a　woman；　in　a　way　that　could　never　be　true　for　a　man；　the　first　night　of　sexual　surrender　involved　one　of　the　moments　of　greatest　vulnerability　in　a　relationship。　Assuming；　of　course；　that　she　had　surrendered　not　solely　because　of　physical　need　but　because　she　loved　him。　And　Holly　loved　him。　
　〃I'm　in　love　with　him；〃　she　said　aloud；　surprised　because　she　had　convinced　herself　that　his　appeal　was　largely　the　result　of　his　exceptional　male　grace；　animal　magnetism；　and　mystery。　
　The　clerk；　ten　years　younger　than　Holly　and　therefore　more　inclined　to　think　that　love　was　everywhere　and　inevitable；　grinned　at　her。　〃It's　great；　isn't　it？〃　Signing　the　charge　slip；　Holly　said；　〃Do　you　believe　in　love　at　first　sight？〃　〃Why　not？〃　〃Well；　it's　not　first　sight；　really。　I've　known　the　guy　since　August　twelfth；　which　is。　。　。　sixteen　days。〃　
　〃And　you're　not　married　yet？〃　the　clerk　joked。　
　When　Holly　went　out　to　the　Ford　and　got　in　beside　Jim；　she　said；　〃When　we　get　where　we're　going；　you　won't　carve　me　up　with　a　chainsaw　and　bury　me　under　the　windmill；　will　you？〃　Apparently　he　understood　her　sense　of　vulnerability　and　took　no　offense　；　for　he　said　with　mock　solemnity；　〃Oh；　no。　It's　full…up　under　the　mill。　
　I'll　have　to　bury　pieces　of　you　all　over　the　farm。〃　
　She　laughed。　She　was　an　idiot　for　fearing　him。　
　He　leaned　over　and　kissed　her。　It　was　a　lovely；　lingering　kiss。　
　When　they　parted；　he　said；　〃I'm　taking　as　big　a　risk　as　you　are。〃　
　〃Let　me　assure　you；　I've　never　hacked　anyone　to　bits　with　an　axe。〃　
　〃I　mean　it。　I　haven't　been　lucky　in　love。〃　
　〃Me　neither。〃　
　〃This　time　will　be　different　for　both　of　us。〃　
　He　gave　her　another　kiss；　shorter　and　sweeter　than　the　first　one；　then　started　the　car　and　backed　out　of　the　parking　space。　
　In　a　determined　attempt　to　keep　the　dying　cynic　in　her　alive；　Holly　reminded　herself　that　he　had　not　actually　said　he　loved　her。　His　mitment　had　been　carefully　and　indirectly　phrased。　He　might　be　no　more　reliable　than　other　men　she　had　trusted　over　the　years。　
　On　the　other　hand；　she　had　not　actually　said　that　she　loved　him；　either。　
　Her　mitment　had　been　no　more　effusively　stated　than　his。　
　Perhaps　because　she　still　felt　the　need　to　protect　herself　to　some　extent；　she　had　found　it　easier　to　reveal　her　heart　to　the　motel　clerk　than　to　Jim。　
　Washing　down　blueberry　muffins　with　black　coffee；　for　which　they　had　stopped　at　a　convenience　store；　they　traveled　north　on　the　San　Diego　Freeway。　The　Tuesday…morning　rush　hour　had　passed；　but　at　some　places　traffic　still　clogged　all　lanes　and　moved　like　a　snail　herd　being　driven　'；　toward　a　gourmet　restaurant。　
　I　fortably　ensconced　in　the　passenger　seat；　Holly　told　Jim　about　her　four　nightmares；　as　promised。　She　started　with　the　initial　dream　of　blindness　on　Friday　night；　concluding　with　last　night's　spookshow；　which　had　been　the　most　bizarre　and　fearful　of　all。　
　He　was　clearly　fascinated　that　she　had　dreamed　about　the　mill　without　even　knowing　of　its　existence。　And　on　Sunday　night；　after　surviving　the　crash　of　Flight　246；　she　had　dreamed　of　him　at　the　mill　as　a　ten　year…old　boy；　when　she　could　not　yet　have　known　either　that　the　mill　was　a　familiar　place　to　him　or　that　he　had　spent　a　lot　of　time　there　when　he　was　ten。　
　But　the　majority　of　his　questions　related　to　her　most　recent　nightmare。　
　Keeping　his　eyes　on　the　traffic　ahead；　he　said；　〃Who　was　the　woman　in　the　dream　if　she　wasn't　you？〃　〃I　don't　know；〃　Holly　said；　finishing　the　final　bite　of　the　last　muffin。　
　〃I　had　no　sense　of　her　identity。〃　
　〃Can　you　describe　her？〃　〃I　only　saw　her　reflection　in　that　window；　so　I　can't　tell　you　much；　I'm　afraid。〃　She　drank　the　last　of　the　coffee　from　her　big　Styrofoam　cup；　and　thought　a　moment。　It　was　easier　to　visualize　the　scenes　of　that　dream　than　it　should　have　been；　for　dreams　were　usually　quick　to　fade　from　memory。　
　Images　from　that　one　returned　to　her　quite　vividly；　however；　as　if　she　had　not　dreamed　them　but　experienced　them　in　real　life。　〃She　had　a　broad　clear　face；　more　handsome　in　a　womanly　way　than　pretty。　
　Wide…set　eyes；　full　mouth。　A　beauty　mark　high　on　her　right　cheek；　I　don't　think　it　could've　been　a　spot　on　the　glass；　just　a　little　round　dot。　Curly　hair。　Do　you　recognize　her？〃　〃No；〃　he　replied。　〃Can't　say　that　I　do。　Tell　me　what　you　saw　at　the　bottom　of　the　pond　when　the　lightning　flashed。〃　
　〃I'm　not　sure　what　it　was。〃　
　〃Describe　it　as　best　you　can。〃　
　She　pondered　for　a　moment；　then　shook　her　head。　〃I　can't。　The　woman's　face　was　fairly　easy　to　recall　because　when　I　saw　it　in　the　dream　I　knew　what　it　was；　a　face；　a　human　face。　But　whatever　was　lying　at　the　bottom　of　the　pond。　。　。　that　was　strange；　like　nothing　I'd　ever　seen　beù　fore。　
　I　didn't　know　what　I　was　looking　at；　and　I　had　such　a　brief　glimpse　of　it　and。　。　。　well；　now　it's　just　gone。　Is　there　really　something　peculiar　under　that　pond？〃　〃Not　that　I　know　of；〃　he　said。　〃Could　it've　been　a　sunken　boat；　a　rowboat；　anything　like　that？〃　〃No；〃　she　said。　〃Nothing　at　all　like　that。　Much　bigger。　Did　a　boat　sink　in　the　pond　once？〃　〃I　never　heard　of　it；　if　one　did。　It's　a　deceptive…looking　bit　of　water；　though。　You　expect　a　millpond　to　be　shallow；　but　this　one　is　deep；　forty　or　fifty　feet　toward　the　center。　It　never　dries　out；　and　it　doesn't　shrink　during　dry　years；　either；　because　it's　formed　over　an　artesian　well；　not　just　an　aquifer。〃　
　〃What's　the　difference？〃　〃An　aquifer　is　what　you　drill　into　when　you're　sinking　a　well；　it's　sort　of　a　reservoir　or　stream　of　underground　water。　Artesian　wells　are　rarer。　You　don't　drill　into　one　to　find　water；　'cause　the　water　is　already　ing　to　the　surface　under　pressure。　You'd　have　the　devil's　own　time　trying　to　stop　the　stuff　from　percolating　up。〃　
　The　snarl　of　traffic　began　to　loosen；　but　Jim　did　not　take　full　advantage　of　opportunities　to　change　lanes　and　swing　around　slower…moving　vehicles。　
　He　was　more　interested　in　her　answers　than　in　making　better　time。　
　He　said；　〃And　in　the　dream；　when　you　got　to　the　top　of　the　stairs…or　when　this　woman　got　to　the　top　of　the　stairs…you　saw　a　ten…year…old　boy　standing　there；　and　somehow　you　knew　he　was　me。〃　
　〃Yes。〃　
　〃I　don't　look　much　like　I　looked　when　I　was　ten；　so　how'd　you　recognize　me？〃　〃Mostly　it　was　your　eyes；〃　Holly　said。　〃They　haven't　changed　much　in　all　these　years。　They're　unmistakable。〃　
　〃Lots　of　people　have　blue　eyes。〃　
　〃Are　you　serious？　Honey；　your　blue　eyes　are　to　other　blue　eyes　what　Sinatra's　voice　is　to　Donald　Duck's。〃　
　〃You're　prejudiced。　What　did　you　see　in　the　wall？〃　She　described　it　again。　
　〃Alive　in　the　stone？　This　just　gets　stranger　and　stranger。〃　
　〃I　haven't　been　bored　in　days；〃　she　agreed。　
　Beyond　the　junction　with　Interstate　10；　traffic　on　the　San　Diego　Freeway　became　even　lighter；　and　finally　Jim　began　to　put　some　of　his　driving　skills　to　use。　He　handled　the　car　the　way　a　first…rate　jockey　handled　a　thoroughbred　horse；　finessing　from　it　that　extra　degree　of　performance　that　won　races。　The　Ford　was　only　a　stock　model　with　no　modification；　but　it　responded　to　him　as　if　it　wanted　to　be　a　Porsche。　
　After　a　while　Holly　began　to　ask　questions　of　her　own。　〃How　e　you're　a　millionaire　but　you　live　relatively　cheap？〃　〃Bought　a　house；　moved　out　of　my　apartment。　Quit　my　job。〃　
　〃Yeah；　but　a　modest　house。　And　your　furniture's　falling　apart。〃　
　〃I　needed　the　privacy　of　my　own　house　to　meditate　and　rest　between。　。　。　
　assignments。　But　I　didn't　need　fancy　furniture。〃　
　Following　a　few　minutes　of　mutual　silence；　she　said；　〃Did　I　catch　your　eye　the　way　you　caught　mine；　right　off　the　bat；　up　in　Portland？〃　He　smiled　but　didn't　look　away　from　the　highway。〃　So　are　you；　Miss　Thorne。'〃　〃So　you　admit　it！〃　Holly　said；　pleased。　〃It　was　a　e…on　line。〃　
　They　made　excellent　time　from　the　west　side　of　Los　Angeles　all　the　way　to　Ventura；　but　then　Jim　began　to　slack　off　again。　Mile　by　mile；　he　drove　with　less　aggression。　
　Initially　Holly　thought　he　was　lulled　by　the　view。　Past　Ventura；　Route　101　hugged　beautiful　stretches　of　coastline。　They　passed　Pitas　Point；　then　Rincon　Point；　and　the　beaches　of　Carpinteria。　The　blue　sea　rose；　the　blue　sky　fell；　the　golden　land　wedged　itself　between　them；　and　the　only　visible　turbulence　in　the　serene　summer　day　was　the　white…capped　surf；　which　slipped　to　the　shore　in　low　bers　and　broke　with　a　light；　foamy　spray。　
　But　there　was　a　turbulence　in　Jim　Ironheart；　too；　and　Holly　only　became　aware　of　his　new　edginess　when　she　realized　that　he　was　not　paying　any　attention　to　the　scenery。　He　had　slowed　down　not　to　enjoy　the　view　but；　she　suspected；　to　delay　their　arrival　at　the　farm　By　the　time　they　left　the　superhighway；　turned　inland　at　Santa　Barbara；　crossed　the　city；　and　headed　into　the　Santa　Ynez　Mountains；　Jim's　mood　was　undeniably　darker。　
　His　responses　to　her　conversational　sallies　grew　shorter；　more　distracted。　
　State　Route　154　led　out　of　the　mountains　into　an　appealing　land　of　low　hills　and　fields　painted　gold　by　dry　summer　grass；　clusters　of　California　live　oaks；　and　horse　ranches　with　neat　white　fencing。　This　was　not　the　farming…intense；　agribusiness　atmosphere　of　the　San　Joaquin　and　certain　other　valleys；　there　were　serious　vineyards　here　and　there；　but　the　occasional　farms　appeared　to　be；　as　often　as　not；　gentlemen's　operations　maintained　as　getaways　for　rich　men　in　Los　Angeles；　more　concerned　with　cultivating　a　picturesque　alternate　lifestyle　than　with　real　crops。　
　〃We'll　need　to　stop　in　New　Svenborg　to　get　a　few　things　before　we　head　out　to　the　farm；〃　Jim　said。　
　〃What　things？〃　〃I　don't　know。　But　wh