the works of edgar allan poe-2-第46部分

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amid　a　wilderness　of　error。　I　would　have　them　allow　　what　they
cannot　refrain　from　allowing　　that；　although　temptation　may　have
erewhile　existed　as　great；　man　was　never　thus；　at　least；　tempted
before　　certainly；　never　thus　fell。　And　is　it　therefore　that　he　has
never　thus　suffered？　Have　I　not　indeed　been　living　in　a　dream？　And　am
I　not　now　dying　a　victim　to　the　horror　and　the　mystery　of　the　wildest
of　all　sublunary　visions？

I　am　the　descendant　of　a　race　whose　imaginative　and　easily　excitable
temperament　has　at　all　times　rendered　them　remarkable；　and；　in　my
earliest　infancy；　I　gave　evidence　of　having　fully　inherited　the
family　character。　As　I　advanced　in　years　it　was　more　strongly
developed；　becoming；　for　many　reasons；　a　cause　of　serious　disquietude
to　my　friends；　and　of　positive　injury　to　myself。　I　grew　self…willed；
addicted　to　the　wildest　caprices；　and　a　prey　to　the　most　ungovernable
passions。　Weak…minded；　and　beset　with　constitutional　infirmities　akin
to　my　own；　my　parents　could　do　but　little　to　check　the　evil
propensities　which　distinguished　me。　Some　feeble　and　ill…directed
efforts　resulted　in　complete　failure　on　their　part；　and；　of　course；
in　total　triumph　on　mine。　Thenceforward　my　voice　was　a　household　law；
and　at　an　age　when　few　children　have　abandoned　their　leading…strings；
I　was　left　to　the　guidance　of　my　own　will；　and　became；　in　all　but
name；　the　master　of　my　own　actions。

My　earliest　recollections　of　a　school…life；　are　connected　with　a
large；　rambling；　Elizabethan　house；　in　a　misty…looking　village　of
England；　where　were　a　vast　number　of　gigantic　and　gnarled　trees；　and
where　all　the　houses　were　excessively　ancient。　In　truth；　it　was　a
dream…like　and　spirit…soothing　place；　that　venerable　old　town。　At
this　moment；　in　fancy；　I　feel　the　refreshing　chilliness　of　its
deeply…shadowed　avenues；　inhale　the　fragrance　of　its　thousand
shrubberies；　and　thrill　anew　with　undefinable　delight；　at　the　deep
hollow　note　of　the　church…bell；　breaking；　each　hour；　with　sullen　and
sudden　roar；　upon　the　stillness　of　the　dusky　atmosphere　in　which　the
fretted　Gothic　steeple　lay　imbedded　and　asleep。

It　gives　me；　perhaps；　as　much　of　pleasure　as　I　can　now　in　any　manner
experience；　to　dwell　upon　minute　recollections　of　the　school　and　its
concerns。　Steeped　in　misery　as　I　am　　misery；　alas！　only　too　real　
I　shall　be　pardoned　for　seeking　relief；　however　slight　and　temporary；
in　the　weakness　of　a　few　rambling　details。　These；　moreover；　utterly
trivial；　and　even　ridiculous　in　themselves；　assume；　to　my　fancy；
adventitious　importance；　as　connected　with　a　period　and　a　locality
when　and　where　I　recognise　the　first　ambiguous　monitions　of　the
destiny　which　afterwards　so　fully　overshadowed　me。　Let　me　then
remember。

The　house；　I　have　said；　was　old　and　irregular。　The　grounds　were
extensive；　and　a　high　and　solid　brick　wall；　topped　with　a　bed　of
mortar　and　broken　glass；　encompassed　the　whole。　This　prison…like
rampart　formed　the　limit　of　our　domain；　beyond　it　we　saw　but　thrice　a
week　　once　every　Saturday　afternoon；　when；　attended　by　two　ushers；
we　were　permitted　to　take　brief　walks　in　a　body　through　some　of　the
neighbouring　fields　　and　twice　during　Sunday；　when　we　were　paraded
in　the　same　formal　manner　to　the　morning　and　evening　service　in　the
one　church　of　the　village。　Of　this　church　the　principal　of　our　school
was　pastor。　With　how　deep　a　spirit　of　wonder　and　perplexity　was　I
wont　to　regard　him　from　our　remote　pew　in　the　gallery；　as；　with　step
solemn　and　slow；　he　ascended　the　pulpit！　This　reverend　man；　with
countenance　so　demurely　benign；　with　robes　so　glossy　and　so
clerically　flowing；　with　wig　so　minutely　powdered；　so　rigid　and　so
vast；　　…could　this　be　he　who；　of　late；　with　sour　visage；　and　in
snuffy　habiliments；　administered；　ferule　in　hand；　the　Draconian　laws
of　the　academy？　Oh；　gigantic　paradox；　too　utterly　monstrous　for
solution！

At　an　angle　of　the　ponderous　wall　frowned　a　more　ponderous　gate。　It
was　riveted　and　studded　with　iron　bolts；　and　surmounted　with　jagged
iron　spikes。　What　impressions　of　deep　awe　did　it　inspire！　It　was
never　opened　save　for　the　three　periodical　egressions　and　ingressions
already　mentioned；　then；　in　every　creak　of　its　mighty　hinges；　we
found　a　plenitude　of　mystery　　a　world　of　matter　for　solemn　remark；
or　for　more　solemn　meditation。

The　extensive　enclosure　was　irregular　in　form；　having　many　capacious
recesses。　Of　these；　three　or　four　of　the　largest　constituted　the
play…ground。　It　was　level；　and　covered　with　fine　hard　gravel。　I　well
remember　it　had　no　trees；　nor　benches；　nor　anything　similar　within
it。　Of　course　it　was　in　the　rear　of　the　house。　In　front　lay　a　small
parterre；　planted　with　box　and　other　shrubs；　but　through　this　sacred
division　we　passed　only　upon　rare　occasions　indeed　　such　as　a　first
advent　to　school　or　final　departure　thence；　or　perhaps；　when　a　parent
or　friend　having　called　for　us；　we　joyfully　took　our　way　home　for　the
Christmas　or　Midsummer　holy…days。

But　the　house！　　how　quaint　an　old　building　was　this！　　to　me　how
veritably　a　palace　of　enchantment！　There　was　really　no　end　to　its
windings　　to　its　incomprehensible　subdivisions。　It　was　difficult；
at　any　given　time；　to　say　with　certainty　upon　which　of　its　two
stories　one　happened　to　be。　From　each　room　to　every　other　there　were
sure　to　be　found　three　or　four　steps　either　in　ascent　or　descent。
Then　the　lateral　branches　were　innumerable　　inconceivable　　and　so
returning　in　upon　themselves；　that　our　most　exact　ideas　in　regard　to
the　whole　mansion　were　not　very　far　different　from　those　with　which
we　pondered　upon　infinity。　During　the　five　years　of　my　residence
here；　I　was　never　able　to　ascertain　with　precision；　in　what　remote
locality　lay　the　little　sleeping　apartment　assigned　to　myself　and
some　eighteen　or　twenty　other　scholars。

The　school…room　was　the　largest　in　the　house　　I　could　not　help
thinking；　in　the　world。　It　was　very　long；　narrow；　and　dismally　low；
with　pointed　Gothic　windows　and　a　ceiling　of　oak。　In　a　remote　and
terror…inspiring　angle　was　a　square　enclosure　of　eight　or　ten　feet；
comprising　the　sanctum；　〃during　hours；〃　of　our　principal；　the
Reverend　Dr。　Bransby。　It　was　a　solid　structure；　with　massy　door；
sooner　than　open　which　in　the　absence　of　the　〃Dominic；〃　we　would　all
have　willingly　perished　by　the　peine　forte　et　dure。　In　other　angles
were　two　other　similar　boxes；　far　less　reverenced；　indeed；　but　still
greatly　matters　of　awe。　One　of　these　was　the　pulpit　of　the
〃classical〃　usher；　one　of　the　〃English　and　mathematical。〃
Interspersed　about　the　room；　crossing　and　recrossing　in　endless
irregularity；　were　innumerable　benches　and　desks；　black；　ancient；　and
time…worn；　piled　desperately　with　much…bethumbed　books；　and　so
beseamed　with　initial　letters；　names　at　full　length；　grotesque
figures；　and　other　multiplied　efforts　of　the　knife；　as　to　have
entirely　lost　what　little　of　original　form　might　have　been　their
portion　in　days　long　departed。　A　huge　bucket　with　water　stood　at　one
extremity　of　the　room；　and　a　clock　of　stupendous　dimensions　at　the
other。

Encompassed　by　the　massy　walls　of　this　venerable　academy；　I　passed；
yet　not　in　tedium　or　disgust；　the　years　of　the　third　lustrum　of　my
life。　The　teeming　brain　of　childhood　requires　no　external　world　of
incident　to　occupy　or　amuse　it；　and　the　apparently　dismal　monotony　of
a　school　was　replete　with　more　intense　excitement　than　my　riper　youth
has　derived　from　luxury；　or　my　full　manhood　from　crime。　Yet　I　must
believe　that　my　first　mental　development　had　in　it　much　of　the
uncommon　　even　much　of　the　outre。　Upon　mankind　at　large　the　events
of　very　early　existence　rarely　leave　in　mature　age　any　definite
impression。　All　is　gray　shadow　　a　weak　and　irregular　remembrance　
an　indistinct　regathering　of　feeble　pleasures　and　phantasmagoric
pains。　With　me　this　is　not　so。　In　childhood　I　must　have　felt　with　the
energy　of　a　man　what　I　now　find　stamped　upon　memory　in　lines　as
vivid；　as　deep；　and　as　durable　as　the　exergues　of　the　Carthaginian
medals。

Yet　in　fact　　in　the　fact　of　the　world's　view　　how　little　was
there　to　remember！　The　morning's　awakening；　the　nightly　summons　to
bed；　the　connings；　the　recitations；　the　periodical　half…holidays；　and
perambulations；　the　play…ground；　with　its　broils；　its　pastimes；　its
intrigues；　　these；　by　a　mental　sorcery　long　forgotten；　were　made　to
involve　a　wilderness　of　sensation；　a　world　of　rich　incident；　an
universe　of　varied　emotion；　of　excitement　the　most　passionate　and
spirit…stirring。　〃Oh；　le　bon　temps；　que　ce　siecle　de　fer！〃

In　truth；　the　ardor；　the　enthusiasm；　and　the　imperiousness　of　my
disposition；　soon　rendered　me　a　marked　character　among　my
schoolmates；　and　by　slow；　but　natural　gradations；　gave　me　an
ascendancy　over　all　not　greatly　older　than　myself；　　over　all　with　a
single　exception。　This　exception　was　found　in　the　person　of　a
scholar；　who；　although　no　relation；　bore　the　same　Christian　and
surname　as　myself；　　a　circumstance；　in　fact；　little　remarkable；
for；　notwithstanding　a　noble　descent；　mine　was　one　of　those　everyday
appellations　which　seem；　by　prescriptive　right；　to　have　been；　time
out　of　mind；　the　common　property　of　the　mob。　In　this　narrative　I　have
therefore　designated　myself　as　William　Wilson；　　a　fictitious　title
not　very　dissimilar　to　the　real。　My　namesake　alone；　of　those　who　in
school　phraseology　constituted　〃our　set；〃　presumed　to　compete　with　me
in　the　studies　of　the　class　　in　the　sports　and　broils　of　the
play…ground　　to　refuse　implicit　belief　in　my　assertions；　and
submission　to　my　will　　indeed；　to　interfere　with　my　arbitrary
dictation　in　any　respect　whatsoever。　If　there　is　on　earth　a　supreme
and　unqualified　despotism；　it　is　the　despotism　of　a　master　mind　in
boyhood　over　the　less　energetic　spirits　of　its　companions。

Wilson's　rebellion　was　to　me　a　source　of　the　greatest　embarrassment；
　the　more　so　as；　in　spite　of　the　bravado　with　which　in　public　I
made　a　point　of　treating　him　and　his　pretensions；　I　secretly　felt
that　I　feared　him；　and　could　not　help　thinking　the　equality　which　he
maintained　so　easily　with　myself；　a　proof　of　his　true　superiority；
since　not　to　be　overcome　cost　me　a　perpetual　struggle。　Yet　this
superiority　　even　this　equality　　wa