the way to peace-第5部分

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In　her　desire　for　a　new　emotion；　her　eagerness　to　FEEL

that　eagerness　which　is　really　a　sensuality　of　the　mind

she　was　too　absorbed　in　her　own　self…chosen　hardships　to　think

of　his；　which　were　not　entirely　self…chosen。





〃I　think　I　can　find　enough　to　do；〃　he　said；　〃the　Shakers　need

an　able…bodied　man；　they　only　have　those　three　old　men。〃



〃How　do　you　know　that？〃　she　asked；　quickly。



〃I've　been　to　see　them　twice　this　winter；〃　he　said。



〃Why！〃　she　said；　amazed；　〃you　never　told　me！〃



〃I　don't　tell　you　everything　nowadays；　'Thalia；〃　he　said；　briefly。



In　those　two　visits　to　the　Shakers；　Lewis　Hall　had　been　treated　with

great　delicacy；　there　had　been　no　effort　to　proselytize；　and　equally

there　had　been　no　triumphing　over　the　accession　of　his　wife；　in　fact；

Athalia　was　hardly　referred　to；　except　when　they　told　him　that　they　would

take　good　care　of　her；　and　when　Brother　Nathan　volunteered　a　brief　summary

of　Shaker　doctrines〃so　as　you　can　feel　easy　about　her；〃　he　explained：

〃We　believe　that　Christ　was　the　male　principle　in　Deity；　and　Mother　Ann

was　the　female　principle。　　And　we　believe　in　confession　of　our　sins；

and　communion　with　the　deadspiritualism；　they　call　it　nowadays

and　in　the　virgin　life。　　Shakers　don't　marry；　nor　give　in　marriage。

And　we　have　all　things　in　common。　　That's　all；　friend。　　You　see；

we　don't　teach　anything　that　Christ　didn't　teach；　so　she　won't　learn

any　evil　from　us。　　Simple；　ain't　it。？〃



〃Well；　yes；　after　a　fashion；〃　Lewis　Hall　said；　〃but　it　isn't　human。〃



And　Brother　Nathan　smiled　mysti…cally。　〃Maybe　that　isn't　against　it；

in　the　long　run；〃　he　said。





They　came　to　the　community　in　the　spring　twilight。

The　brothers　and　sisters　had　assembled　to　meet　the　convert；

and　to　give　a　neighborly　hand　to　the　silent　man　who　was　to　live　by

himself　in　a　little；　gray；　shingled　house　down　on　Lonely　Lake　Road。

It　was　a　supreme　moment　to　Athalia。　　She　had　expected　an　intense

parting　from　her　husband　when　they　left　their　own　house；

and　she　was　ready　to　press　into　her　soul　the　poignant

thorn　of　grief；　not　only　because　it　would　make　her　FEEL；

but　because　it　would　emphasize　in　her　own　mind　the　divine

self…sacrifice　which　she　wanted　to　believe　she　was　making。

But　when　the　moment　came　to　close　the　door　of　the　old　home

behind　them；　her　husband　was　cruelly　commonplace　about　itfor　poor

Lewis　had　no　more　drama　in　him　than　a　kindly　Newfoundland　dog！

He　was　full　of　practical　cares　for　his　tenant；　and　he　stopped　even

while　he　was　turning　the　key　in　the　lock；　to　〃fuss；〃　as　Athalia　said；

over　some　last　details　of　the　transfer　of　the　sawmill。

Athalia　could　not　tear　herself　from　arms　that　placidly　consented

to　her　withdrawal；　so　there　had　been　no　rending　ecstasies。

In　consequence；　on　the　journey　up　to　the　community　she　was

a　little　morose；　a　little　irritable　even；　just　as　the　drunkard

is　apt　to　be　irritable　when　sobriety　is　unescapable。　。　。　。

But　at　the　door　of　the　Family　House　she　had　her　opportunity：

she　said；　dramatically；　〃Good…night_Brother　Lewis_。〃

It　was　an　entirely　sincere　moment。　　Dramatic　natures　are　not

often　insincere；　they　are　only　unreal。



As　for　her　husband；　he　said；　calmly；　〃Good…night；　dear；〃

and　trudged　off　in　the　cool　May　dusk　down　Lonely　Lake　Road。

He　found　the　door　of　the　house　on　the　latch；　and　a　little

fire　glowing　in　the　stove；　Brother　Nathan　had　seen

to　that；　and　had　left　some　food　on　the　table　for　him。

But　in　spite　of　the　old　man's　friendly　foresight　the　house

had　all　the　desolation　of　confusion；　in　the　kitchen　there

were　two　or　three　cases　of　books；　broken　open　but　not　unpacked；

a　trunk　and　a　carpet…bag；　and　some　bundles　of　groceries；

they　had　been　left　by　the　expressman　on　tables　and　chairs

and　on　the　floor；　so　that　the　solitary　man　had　to　do　some

lifting　and　unpacking　before　he　could　sit　down　in　his

loneliness　to　eat　the　supper　Brother　Nathan　had　provided。

He　looked　about　to　see　where　he　would　put　up　shelves　for

his　books；　and　as　he　did　so　the　remembrance　of　his　quiet；

shabby　old　study　came　to　him；　almost　like　a　blow。



〃Well；〃　he　said　to　himself；　〃this　won't　be　for　so　very　long。

We'll　be　back　again　in　a　year；　I　guess。　　Poor　little　Tay！　　I　shouldn't

wonder　if　it　was　six　months。　　I　wonder；　can　I　buy　Henry　Davis　off；

if　she　wants　to　go　back　in　six　months？〃



And　yet；　in　spite　of　his　calm　understanding　of　the　situation；

the　wound　burned。　　As　he　went　about　putting　things　into　some

semblance　of　order；　he　paused　once　and　looked　hard　into

the　fire。　。　。　。　When　she　did　want　to　go　backlet　it　be　in　six

months　or　six　weeks　or　six　dayswould　things　be　the　same？

Something　had　been　done　to　the　very　structure　and　fabric

of　their　life。　　〃Can　it　ever　be　the　same？〃　he　said　to　himself；

and　then　he　passed　his　hand　over　his　eyes；　in　a　bewildered

way〃Will　I　be　the　same？〃　he　said。









III



SUMMER　at　the　Shaker　settlement；　lying　in　the　green　cup　of　the　hills；

was　very　beautiful。　　The　yellow　houses　along　the　grassy　street

drowsed　in　the　sunshine；　and　when　the　wind　stirred　the　maple　leaves

one　could　see　the　distant　sparkle　of　the　lake。　　Athalia　had　a　fancy；

in　the　warm　twilights；　for　walking　down　Lonely　Lake　Road；　that　jolted

over　logs　and　across　gullies　and　stopped　abruptly　at　the　water's　edge。

She　had　to　pass　Lewis's　house　on　the　way；　and　if　he　saw　her　he　would

call　out　to　her；　cheerfully；



〃Hullo；　'Thalia！　how　are　you；　dear？〃



And　she；　with　prim　intensity；　would　reply；　〃Good…evening；　BROTHER　Lewis。〃



If　one　of　the　sisters　was　with　her；　they　would　stop　and　speak　to　him；

otherwise　she　passed　him　by　in　such　an　eager　consciousness　of　her

part　that　he　smiledand　then　sighed。　　When　she　had　a　companion；

Lewis　and　the　other　Shakeress　would　gossip　about　the　weather

or　the　haying；　and　Lewis　would　have　the　chance　to　say：

〃You're　not　overworking；　'Thalia？　　You're　not　tired？〃　　While　Athalia；

in　her　net　cap　and　her　gray　shoulder　cape　buttoned　close　up　to　her　chin；

would　dismiss　the　anxious　affection　with　a　peremptory　〃Of　course　not！

I　have　bread　to　eat　you　know　not　of；　Brother　Lewis。〃

Then　she　would　add；　didactically；　some　word　of　dogma　or　admonition。



But　she　had　not　much　time　to　give　to　Brother　Lewis's　salvation

she　was　so　busy　in　adjusting　herself　to　her　new　life。

Its　picturesque　details　fascinated　herthe　cap；　the　brevity　of　speech；

the　small　mannerisms；　the　occasional　and　very　reserved　mysticism；

absorbed　her　so　that　she　thought　very　little　of　her　husband。

She　saw　him　occasionally　on　those　walks　down　to　the　lake；

or　when；　after　a　day　in　the　fields　with　the　three　old　Shaker　men；

Brother　Nathan　brought　him　home　to　supper。



〃We　Shakers　are　given　to　hospitality；〃　he　said；　〃we're　always

looking　for　the　angel　we　are　going　to　entertain　unawares。

Come　along　home　with　us；　Lewis。〃　　And　Lewis　would　plod　up

the　hill　and　take　his　turn　at　the　tin　washbasin；　and　then

file　down　the　men's　side　of　the　stairs　to　the　dining…room；

where　he　and　the　three　old　brothers　sat　at　one　table；

and　Athalia　and　the　eight　sisters　sat　at　the　other　table。

After　supper　he　had　the　chance　to　see　Athalia　and　to　make

sure　that　she　was　not　looking　tired。　　〃You　didn't　take　cold

yesterday；　'Thalia？　　I　saw　you　were　out　in　the　rain；〃　he　would　say。

And　she；　always　a　little　embarrassed　at　such　personal　interest；

would　reply；　primly；　〃I　am　not　at　all　tired；　Brother　Lewis。〃

Nathan　used　to　walk　home　with　his　guest；　and　sometimes　they

talked　of　work　that　must　be　done；　and　sometimes　touched　on　more

unpractical　thingsthose　spiritual　manifestations　which　at

rare　intervals　centred　in　Brother　William　and　were　the　hope

of　the　whole　community。　　For　who　could　tell　when　the　old

man's　incoherent　muttering　would　break　into　the　clear　speech

of　one　of　those　Heavenly　Visitants　who；　in　the　early　days；

had　descended　upon　the　Shakers；　and　then；　for　some　divine

and　deeply　mysterious　reason；　withdrawn　from　such　pure　channels

of　communication；　and　manifested　themselves　in　the　world；

but　through　base　and　sordid　natures。　　Poor；　vague　Brother　William；

who　saw　visions　and　dreamed　dreams；　was；　in　this　community；

the　torch　that　held　a　smouldering　spark　of　the　divine　fire；

and　when；　in　a　cataleptic　state；　his　faint　intelligence　fluttered

back　into　some　dim　depths　of　personality；　and　he　moaned

and　muttered；　using　awful　names　with　babbling　freedom；

Brother　Nathan　and　the　rest　listened　with　pathetic　eagerness

for　a　_〃thus　saith　the　Lord；〃_　which　should　enflame　the　gray

embers　of　Shakerism　and　give　light　to　the　whole　world！

When　Nathan　talked　of　these　things　he　would　add；　with　a　sigh；

that　he　hoped　some　day　William　would　be　inspired　to　tell　them　something

more　of　Sister　Lydia：　　〃Once　William　said；　'Coming；　coming。'

_I_　think　it　meant　Lydia；　but　Eldress　thought　it　was　Athalia；

it　was　just　before　she　came。〃　　Brother　Nathan　sighed。

〃I　wish　it　had　meant　Lydy；〃　he　said；　simply。



If　Lewis　wished　it　had　meant　Lydy；　he　did　not　say　so。

And；　indeed；　he　said　very　little　upon　any　subject；

Brother　Nathan　did　most　of　the　talking。



〃I　fled　from　the　City　of　Destruction　when　I　was　thirty；〃

he　told　Lewis；　〃that　was　just　a　year　before　Sister　Lydy　left　us。

Poor　Lydy！　poor　Lydy！〃　he　said。　　〃Oh；　yee；　_I_　know　the　world。

I　know　it；　my　boy！　　Do　you？〃



〃Why；　after　a　fashion；〃　Lewis　said；　and　then　he　asked；　suddenly；　〃Why　did

you　turn　Shaker；　Nathan？〃



〃Well；　I　got　hold　of　a　Shaker　book　that　set　me　thinking。

Sister　Lydia　gave　it　to　me。　　I　met　Sister　Lydia　when　she

had　come　down　to　the　place　I　lived　to　sell　baskets。

And　she　was　interested　in　my　salvation；　and　gave　me　the　book。

Then　I　got　to　figuring　out　the　Prophecies；　and　I　saw　Shakerism

fulfilled　them；　and　then　I　began　to　see　that　when　you　don't

own　anything　yourself　you　can't　worry　about　your　property；

well；　that　clinched　me；　I　guess。　　Poor　Sister　Lydia；　she　didn't

abide　in　grace　herself；〃　he　ended；　sadly。



〃I　should　have　thought　you　would　have　been　sorry