three men on the bummel-第15部分

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For　they　have　a　way　of　teaching　languages　in　Germany　that　is　not
our　way；　and　the　consequence　is　that　when　the　German　youth　or
maiden　leaves　the　gymnasium　or　high　school　at　fifteen；　〃it〃　（as　in
Germany　one　conveniently　may　say）　can　understand　and　speak　the
tongue　it　has　been　learning。　　In　England　we　have　a　method　that　for
obtaining　the　least　possible　result　at　the　greatest　possible
expenditure　of　time　and　money　is　perhaps　unequalled。　　An　English
boy　who　has　been　through　a　good　middle…class　school　in　England　can
talk　to　a　Frenchman；　slowly　and　with　difficulty；　about　female
gardeners　and　aunts；　conversation　which；　to　a　man　possessed　perhaps
of　neither；　is　liable　to　pall。　　Possibly；　if　he　be　a　bright
exception；　he　may　be　able　to　tell　the　time；　or　make　a　few　guarded
observations　concerning　the　weather。　　No　doubt　he　could　repeat　a
goodly　number　of　irregular　verbs　by　heart；　only；　as　a　matter　of
fact；　few　foreigners　care　to　listen　to　their　own　irregular　verbs；
recited　by　young　Englishmen。　　Likewise　he　might　be　able　to　remember
a　choice　selection　of　grotesquely　involved　French　idioms；　such　as
no　modern　Frenchman　has　ever　heard　or　understands　when　he　does
hear。

The　explanation　is　that；　in　nine　cases　out　of　ten；　he　has　learnt
French　from　an　〃Ahn's　First…Course。〃　　The　history　of　this　famous
work　is　remarkable　and　instructive。　　The　book　was　originally
written　for　a　joke；　by　a　witty　Frenchman　who　had　resided　for　some
years　in　England。　　He　intended　it　as　a　satire　upon　the
conversational　powers　of　British　society。　　From　this　point　of　view
it　was　distinctly　good。　　He　submitted　it　to　a　London　publishing
firm。　　The　manager　was　a　shrewd　man。　　He　read　the　book　through。
Then　he　sent　for　the　author。

〃This　book　of　yours；〃　said　he　to　the　author；　〃is　very　clever。　　I
have　laughed　over　it　myself　till　the　tears　came。〃

〃I　am　delighted　to　hear　you　say　so；〃　replied　the　pleased　Frenchman。
〃I　tried　to　be　truthful　without　being　unnecessarily　offensive。〃

〃It　is　most　amusing；〃　concurred　the　manager；　〃and　yet　published　as
a　harmless　joke；　I　feel　it　would　fail。〃

The　author's　face　fell。

〃Its　humour；〃　proceeded　the　manager；　〃would　be　denounced　as　forced
and　extravagant。　　It　would　amuse　the　thoughtful　and　intelligent；
but　from　a　business　point　of　view　that　portion　of　the　public　are
never　worth　considering。　　But　I　have　an　idea；〃　continued　the
manager。　　He　glanced　round　the　room　to　be　sure　they　were　alone；
and　leaning　forward　sunk　his　voice　to　a　whisper。　　〃My　notion　is　to
publish　it　as　a　serious　work　for　the　use　of　schools！〃

The　author　stared；　speechless。

〃I　know　the　English　schoolman；〃　said　the　manager；　〃this　book　will
appeal　to　him。　　It　will　exactly　fit　in　with　his　method。　　Nothing
sillier；　nothing　more　useless　for　the　purpose　will　he　ever
discover。　　He　will　smack　his　lips　over　the　book；　as　a　puppy　licks
up　blacking。〃

The　author；　sacrificing　art　to　greed；　consented。　　They　altered　the
title　and　added　a　vocabulary；　but　left　the　book　otherwise　as　it
was。

The　result　is　known　to　every　schoolboy。　　〃Ahn〃　became　the　palladium
of　English　philological　education。　　If　it　no　longer　retains　its
ubiquity；　it　is　because　something　even　less　adaptable　to　the　object
in　view　has　been　since　invented。

Lest；　in　spite　of　all；　the　British　schoolboy　should　obtain；　even
from　the　like　of　〃Ahn；〃　some　glimmering　of　French；　the　British
educational　method　further　handicaps　him　by　bestowing　upon　him　the
assistance　of；　what　is　termed　in　the　prospectus；　〃A　native
gentleman。〃　　This　native　French　gentleman；　who；　by…the…by；　is
generally　a　Belgian；　is　no　doubt　a　most　worthy　person；　and　can；　it
is　true；　understand　and　speak　his　own　language　with　tolerable
fluency。　　There　his　qualifications　cease。　　Invariably　he　is　a　man
with　a　quite　remarkable　inability　to　teach　anybody　anything。
Indeed；　he　would　seem　to　be　chosen　not　so　much　as　an　instructor　as
an　amuser　of　youth。　　He　is　always　a　comic　figure。　　No　Frenchman　of
a　dignified　appearance　would　be　engaged　for　any　English　school。　　If
he　possess　by　nature　a　few　harmless　peculiarities；　calculated　to
cause　merriment；　so　much　the　more　is　he　esteemed　by　his　employers。
The　class　naturally　regards　him　as　an　animated　joke。　　The　two　to
four　hours　a　week　that　are　deliberately　wasted　on　this　ancient
farce；　are　looked　forward　to　by　the　boys　as　a　merry　interlude　in　an
otherwise　monotonous　existence。　　And　then；　when　the　proud　parent
takes　his　son　and　heir　to　Dieppe　merely　to　discover　that　the　lad
does　not　know　enough　to　call　a　cab；　he　abuses　not　the　system；　but
its　innocent　victim。

I　confine　my　remarks　to　French；　because　that　is　the　only　language
we　attempt　to　teach　our　youth。　　An　English　boy　who　could　speak
German　would　be　looked　down　upon　as　unpatriotic。　　Why　we　waste　time
in　teaching　even　French　according　to　this　method　I　have　never　been
able　to　understand。　　A　perfect　unacquaintance　with　a　language　is
respectable。　　But　putting　aside　comic　journalists　and　lady
novelists；　for　whom　it　is　a　business　necessity；　this　smattering　of
French　which　we　are　so　proud　to　possess　only　serves　to　render　us
ridiculous。

In　the　German　school　the　method　is　somewhat　different。　　One　hour
every　day　is　devoted　to　the　same　language。　　The　idea　is　not　to　give
the　lad　time　between　each　lesson　to　forget　what　he　learned　at　the
last；　the　idea　is　for　him　to　get　on。　　There　is　no　comic　foreigner
provided　for　his　amusement。　　The　desired　language　is　taught　by　a
German　school…master　who　knows　it　inside　and　out　as　thoroughly　as
he　knows　his　own。　　Maybe　this　system　does　not　provide　the　German
youth　with　that　perfection　of　foreign　accent　for　which　the　British
tourist　is　in　every　land　remarkable；　but　it　has　other　advantages。
The　boy　does　not　call　his　master　〃froggy；〃　or　〃sausage；〃　nor
prepare　for　the　French　or　English　hour　any　exhibition　of　homely　wit
whatever。　　He　just　sits　there；　and　for　his　own　sake　tries　to　learn
that　foreign　tongue　with　as　little　trouble　to　everybody　concerned
as　possible。　　When　he　has　left　school　he　can　talk；　not　about
penknives　and　gardeners　and　aunts　merely；　but　about　European
politics；　history；　Shakespeare；　or　the　musical　glasses；　according
to　the　turn　the　conversation　may　take。

Viewing　the　German　people　from　an　Anglo…Saxon　standpoint；　it　may　be
that　in　this　book　I　shall　find　occasion　to　criticise　them：　　but　on
the　other　hand　there　is　much　that　we　might　learn　from　them；　and　in
the　matter　of　common　sense；　as　applied　to　education；　they　can　give
us　ninety…nine　in　a　hundred　and　beat　us　with　one　hand。

The　beautiful　wood　of　the　Eilenriede　bounds　Hanover　on　the　south
and　west；　and　here　occurred　a　sad　drama　in　which　Harris　took　a
prominent　part。

We　were　riding　our　machines　through　this　wood　on　the　Monday
afternoon　in　the　company　of　many　other　cyclists；　for　it　is　a
favourite　resort　with　the　Hanoverians　on　a　sunny　afternoon；　and　its
shady　pathways　are　then　filled　with　happy；　thoughtless　folk。　　Among
them　rode　a　young　and　beautiful　girl　on　a　machine　that　was　new。
She　was　evidently　a　novice　on　the　bicycle。　　One　felt　instinctively
that　there　would　come　a　moment　when　she　would　require　help；　and
Harris；　with　his　accustomed　chivalry；　suggested　we　should　keep　near
her。　　Harris；　as　he　occasionally　explains　to　George　and　to　myself；
has　daughters　of　his　own；　or；　to　speak　more　correctly；　a　daughter；
who　as　the　years　progress　will　no　doubt　cease　practising　catherine
wheels　in　the　front　garden；　and　will　grow　up　into　a　beautiful　and
respectable　young　lady。　　This　naturally　gives　Harris　an　interest　in
all　beautiful　girls　up　to　the　age　of　thirty…five　or　thereabouts；
they　remind　him；　so　he　says；　of　home。

We　had　ridden　for　about　two　miles；　when　we　noticed；　a　little　ahead
of　us　in　a　space　where　five　ways　met；　a　man　with　a　hose；　watering
the　roads。　　The　pipe；　supported　at　each　joint　by　a　pair　of　tiny
wheels；　writhed　after　him　as　he　moved；　suggesting　a　gigantic…worm；
from　whose　open　neck；　as　the　man；　gripping　it　firmly　in　both　hands；
pointing　it　now　this　way；　and　now　that；　now　elevating　it；　now
depressing　it；　poured　a　strong　stream　of　water　at　the　rate　of　about
a　gallon　a　second。

〃What　a　much　better　method　than　ours；〃　observed　Harris；
enthusiastically。　　Harris　is　inclined　to　be　chronically　severe　on
all　British　institutions。　　〃How　much　simpler；　quicker；　and　more
economical！　　You　see；　one　man　by　this　method　can　in　five　minutes
water　a　stretch　of　road　that　would　take　us　with　our　clumsy
lumbering　cart　half　an　hour　to　cover。〃

George；　who　was　riding　behind　me　on　the　tandem；　said；　〃Yes；　and　it
is　also　a　method　by　which　with　a　little　carelessness　a　man　could
cover　a　good　many　people　in　a　good　deal　less　time　than　they　could
get　out　of　the　way。〃

George；　the　opposite　to　Harris；　is　British　to　the　core。　　I　remember
George　quite　patriotically　indignant　with　Harris　once　for
suggesting　the　introduction　of　the　guillotine　into　England。

〃It　is　so　much　neater；〃　said　Harris。

〃I　don't　care　if　it　is；〃　said　George；　〃I'm　an　Englishman；　hanging
is　good　enough　for　me。〃

〃Our　water…cart　may　have　its　disadvantages；〃　continued　George；　〃but
it　can　only　make　you　uncomfortable　about　the　legs；　and　you　can
avoid　it。　　This　is　the　sort　of　machine　with　which　a　man　can　follow
you　round　the　corner　and　upstairs。〃

〃It　fascinates　me　to　watch　them；〃　said　Harris。　　〃They　are　so
skilful。　　I　have　seen　a　man　from　the　corner　of　a　crowded　square　in
Strassburg　cover　every　inch　of　ground；　and　not　so　much　as　wet　an
apron　string。　　It　is　marvellous　how　they　judge　their　distance。
They　will　send　the　water　up　to　your　toes；　and　then　bring　it　over
your　head　so　that　it　falls　around　your　heels。　　They　can〃

〃Ease　up　a　minute；〃　said　George。　　I　said：　　〃Why？〃

He　said：　　〃I　am　going　to　get　off　and　watch　the　rest　of　this　show
from　behind　a　tree。　　There　may　be　great　performers　in　this　line；　as
Harris　says；　this　particular　artist　appears　to　me　to　lack
something。　　He　has　just　soused　a　dog；　and　now　he's　busy　watering　a
sign…post。　　I　am　going　to　wait　till　he　has　finished。〃

〃Nonsense；〃　said　Harris；　〃he　won't　wet　you。〃

〃That　is　precisely　what　I　am　going　to　make　sure　of；〃　answered
George；　saying　which　he　jumped　off；　and；　taking　up　a　position
behind　a　remarkably　fine　elm；　pulled　out　and　commen