elizabeth and her german garden-第21部分

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Minora　was　silent。　　Irais's　foot　was　livelier　than　ever。　The　Man　of　Wrath　stood　smiling　blandly　down　upon　us。　You　can't　argue　with　a　person　so　utterly　convinced　of　his　infallibility　that　he　won't　even　get　angry　with　you；　so　we　sat　round　and　said　nothing。

〃If；〃　he　went　on；　addressing　Irais；　who　looked　rebellious；　〃you　doubt　the　truth　of　my　remarks；　and　still　cling　to　the　old　poetic　notion　of　noble；　self…sacrificing　women　tenderly　helping　the　patient　over　the　rough　places　on　the　road　to　death　or　recovery；　let　me　beg　you　to　try　for　yourself；　next　time　any　one　in　your　house　is　ill；　whether　the　actual　fact　in　any　way　corresponds　to　the　picturesque　belief。　The　angel　who　is　to　alleviate　our　sufferings　comes　in　such　a　questionable　shape；　that　to　the　unimaginative　she　appears　merely　as　an　extremely　self…confident　young　woman；　wisely　concerned　first　of　all　in　securing　her　personal　comfort；　much　given　to　complaints　about　her　food　and　to　helplessness　where　she　should　be　helpful；　possessing　an　extraordinary　capacity　for　fancying　herself　slighted；　or　not　regarded　as　the　superior　being　she　knows　herself　to　be；　morbidly　anxious　lest　the　servants　should；　by　some　mistake；　treat　her　with　offensive　cordiality；　pettish　if　the　patient　gives　more　trouble　than　she　had　expected；　intensely　injured　and　disagreeable　if　he　is　made　so　courageous　by　his　wretchedness　as　to　wake　her　during　the　night　an　act　of　desperation　of　which　I　was　guilty　once；　and　once　only。　Oh；　these　good　women！　　What　sane　man　wants　to　have　to　do　with　angels？　And　especially　do　we　object　to　having　them　about　us　when　we　are　sick　and　sorry；　when　we　feel　in　every　fibre　what　poor　things　we　are；　and　when　all　our　fortitude　is　needed　to　enable　us　to　bear　our　temporary　inferiority　patiently；　without　being　forced　besides　to　assume　an　attitude　of　eager　and　grovelling　politeness　towards　the　angel　in　the　house。〃

There　was　a　pause。

〃I　didn't　know　you　could　talk　so　much；　Sage；〃　said　Irais　at　length。

〃What　would　you　have　women　do；　then？〃　asked　Minora　meekly。　Irais　began　to　beat　her　foot　up　and　down　again；what　did　it　matter　what　Men　of　Wrath　would　have　us　do？　　〃There　are　not；〃　continued　Minora；　blushing；　〃husbands　enough　for　every　one；　and　the　rest　must　do　something。〃

〃Certainly；〃　replied　the　oracle。　　〃Study　the　art　of　pleasing　by　dress　and　manner　as　long　as　you　are　of　an　age　to　interest　us；　and　above　all；　let　all　women；　pretty　and　plain；　married　and　single；　study　the　art　of　cookery。　　If　you　are　an　artist　in　the　kitchen　you　will　always　be　esteemed。〃

I　sat　very　still。　　Every　German　woman；　even　the　wayward　Irais；　has　learned　to　cook；　I　seem　to　have　been　the　only　one　who　was　naughty　and　wouldn't。

〃Only　be　careful；〃　he　went　on；　〃in　studying　both　arts；　never　to　forget　the　great　truth　that　dinner　precedes　blandishments　and　not　blandishments　dinner。　　A　man　must　be　made　comfortable　before　he　will　make　love　to　you；　and　though　it　is　true　that　if　you　offered　him　a　choice　between　Spickgans　and　kisses；　he　would　say　he　would　take　both；　yet　he　would　invariably　begin　with　the　Spickgans；　and　allow　the　kisses　to　wait。〃

At　this　I　got　up；　and　Irais　followed　my　example。　〃Your　cynicism　is　disgusting；〃　I　said　icily。

〃You　two　are　always　exceptions　to　anything　I　may　say；〃　he　said；　smiling　amiably。

He　stooped　and　kissed　Irais's　hand。　　She　is　inordinately　vain　of　her　hands；　and　says　her　husband　married　her　for　their　sake；　which　I　can　quite　believe。　　I　am　glad　they　are　on　her　and　not　on　Minora；　for　if　Minora　had　had　them　I　should　have　been　annoyed。　　Minora's　are　bony；　with　chilly…looking　knuckles；　ignored　nails；　and　too　much　wrist。　I　feel　very　well　disposed　towards　her　when　my　eye　falls　on　them。　She　put　one　forward　now；　evidently　thinking　it　would　be　kissed　too。

〃Did　you　know；〃　said　Irais；　seeing　the　movement；　〃that　it　is　the　custom　here　to　kiss　women's　hands？〃

〃But　only　married　women's；〃　I　added；　not　desiring　her　to　feel　out　of　it；　〃never　young　girls'。〃

She　drew　it　in　again。　　〃It　is　a　pretty　custom；〃　she　said　with　a　sigh；　and　pensively　inscribed　it　in　her　book。


January　15th。The　bills　for　my　roses　and　bulbs　and　other　last　year's　horticultural　indulgences　were　all　on　the　table　when　I　came　down　to　breakfast　this　morning。　　They　rather　frightened　me。　　Gardening　is　expensive；　I　find；　when　it　has　to　be　paid　for　out　of　one's　own　private　pin…money。　The　Man　of　Wrath　does　not　in　the　least　want　roses；　or　flowering　shrubs；　or　plantations；　or　new　paths；　and　therefore；　he　asks；　why　should　he　pay　for　them？　So　he　does　not　and　I　do；　and　I　have　to　make　up　for　it　by　not　indulging　all　too　riotously　in　new　clothes；　which　is　no　doubt　very　chastening。　I　certainly　prefer　buying　new　rose…trees　to　new　dresses；　if　I　cannot　comfortably　have　both；　and　I　see　a　time　coming　when　the　passion　for　my　garden　will　have　taken　such　a　hold　on　me　that　I　shall　not　only　entirely　cease　buying　more　clothes；　but　begin　to　sell　those　that　I　already　have。　The　garden　is　so　big　that　everything　has　to　be　bought　wholesale；　and　I　fear　I　shall　not　be　able　to　go　on　much　longer　with　only　one　man　and　a　stork；　because　the　more　I　plant　the　more　there　will　be　to　water　in　the　inevitable　drought；　and　the　watering　is　a　serious　consideration　when　it　means　going　backwards　and　forwards　all　day　long　to　a　pump　near　the　house；　with　a　little　water…cart。　People　living　in　England；　in　almost　perpetual　mildness　and　moisture；　don't　really　know　what　a　drought　is。　If　they　have　some　weeks　of　cloudless　weather；　it　is　generally　preceded　and　followed　by　good　rains；　but　we　have　perhaps　an　hour's　shower　every　week；　and　then　comes　a　month　or　six　weeks'　drought。　　The　soil　is　very　light；　and　dries　so　quickly　that；　after　the　heaviest　thunder…shower；　I　can　walk　over　any　of　my　paths　in　my　thin　shoes；　and　to　keep　the　garden　even　moderately　damp　it　should　pour　with　rain　regularly　every　day　for　three　hours。　My　only　means　of　getting　water　is　to　go　to　the　pump　near　the　house；　or　to　the　little　stream　that　forms　my　eastern　boundary；　and　the　little　stream　dries　up　too　unless　there　has　been　rain；　and　is　at　the　best　of　times　difficult　to　get　at；　having　steep　banks　covered　with　forget…me…nots。　I　possess　one　moist；　peaty　bit　of　ground；　and　that　is　to　be　planted　with　silver　birches　in　imitation　of　the　Hirschwald；　and　is　to　be　carpeted　between　the　birches　with　flaming　azaleas。　　All　the　rest　of　my　soil　is　sandy　the　soil　for　pines　and　acacias；　but　not　the　soil　for　roses；　yet　see　what　love　will　dothere　are　more　roses　in　my　garden　than　any　other　flower！　Next　spring　the　bare　places　are　to　be　filled　with　trees　that　I　have　ordered：　pines　behind　the　delicate　acacias；　and　startling　mountain…ashes；　oaks；　copper…beeches；　maples；　larches；　juniper…treeswas　it　not　Elijah　who　sat　down　to　rest　under　a　juniper…tree？　I　have　often　wondered　how　he　managed　to　get　under　it。　　It　is　a　compact　little　tree；　not　more　than　two　to　three　yards　high　here；　and　all　closely　squeezed　up　together。　　Perhaps　they　grew　more　aggressively　where　he　was。　By　the　time　the　babies　have　grown　old　and　disagreeable　it　will　be　very　pretty　here；　and　then　possibly　they　won't　like　it；　and；　if　they　have　inherited　the　Man　of　Wrath's　indifference　to　gardens；　they　will　let　it　run　wild　and　leave　it　to　return　to　the　state　in　which　I　found　it。　Or　perhaps　their　three　husbands　will　refuse　to　live　in　it；　or　to　come　to　such　a　lonely　place　at　all；　and　then　of　course　its　fate　is　sealed。　My　only　comfort　is　that　husbands　don't　flourish　in　the　desert；　and　that　the　three　will　have　to　wait　a　long　time　before　enough　are　found　to　go　round。　Mothers　tell　me　that　it　is　a　dreadful　business　finding　one　husband；　how　much　more　painful　then　to　have　to　look　for　three　at　once！the　babies　are　so　nearly　the　same　age　that　they　only　just　escaped　being　twins。　　But　I　won't　look。　I　can　imagine　nothing　more　uncomfortable　than　a　son…in…law；　and　besides；　I　don't　think　a　husband　is　at　all　a　good　thing　for　a　girl　to　have。　I　shall　do　my　best　in　the　years　at　my　disposal　to　train　them　so　to　love　the　garden；　and　out…door　life；　and　even　farming；　that；　if　they　have　a　spark　of　their　mother　in　them；　they　will　want　and　ask　for　nothing　better。　My　hope　of　success　is　however　exceedingly　small；　and　there　is　probably　a　fearful　period　in　store　for　me　when　I　shall　be　taken　every　day　during　the　winter　to　the　distant　towns　to　ballsa　poor　old　mother　shivering　in　broad　daylight　in　her　party　gown；　and　being　made　to　start　after　an　early　lunch　and　not　getting　home　till　breakfast…time　next　morning。　Indeed；　they　have　already　developed　an　alarming　desire　to　go　to　〃partings〃　as　they　call　them；　the　April　baby　announcing　her　intention　of　beginning　to　do　so　when　she　is　twelve。　　〃Are　you　twelve；　Mummy？〃　she　asked。

The　gardener　is　leaving　on　the　first　of　April；　and　I　am　trying　to　find　another。　　It　is　grievous　changing　so　often　in　two　years　I　shall　have　had　threebecause　at　each　change　a　great　part　of　my　plants　and　plans　necessarily　suffers。　Seeds　get　lost；　seedlings　are　not　pricked　out　in　time；　places　already　sown　are　planted　with　something　else；　and　there　is　confusion　out　of　doors　and　despair　in　my　heart。　But　he　was　to　have　married　the　cook；　and　the　cook　saw　a　ghost　and　immediately　left；　and　he　is　going　after　her　as　soon　as　he　can；　and　meanwhile　is　wasting　visibly　away。　　What　she　saw　was　doors　that　are　locked　opening　with　a　great　clatter　all　by　themselves　on　the　hingeside；　and　then　somebody　invisible　cursed　at　her。　These　phenomena　now　go　by　the　name　of　〃the　ghost。〃　She　asked　to　be　allowed　to　leave　at　once；　as　she　had　never　been　in　a　place　where　there　was　a　ghost　before。　I　suggested　that　she　should　try　and　get　used　to　it；　but　she　thought　it　would　be　wasting　time；　and　she　looked　so　ill　that　I　let　her　go；　and　the　garden　has　to　suffer。　I　don't　know　why　it　should　be　given　to　cooks　to　see　such　interesting　things　and　withheld　from　me；　but　I　have　had　two　others　since　she　left；　and　they　both　have　seen　the　ghost。　Minora　grows　very　silent　as　bed…time　approaches；　and　relents　towards　Irais　and　myself；　and；　after　having　shown　us　all　day　how　little　she　approves　us；　when　the　bedroom　candles　are　brought　she　quite　begins　to　cling。　　She　has　once　or　twice　anxiously　inquired　whether　Irais　is　sure　she　does　not　object　to　sleeping　alone。

〃If　you　are　at　all　nervous；　I　will　come　and　keep　you　company；〃　she　said；　〃I　don't　mind　at　all；　I　assure　you。〃