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He　was　then　beginning　to　repeat；　but　Minos　pushed　him　forward；

and；　turning　his　back　to　him；　applied　himself　to　the　next

passenger；　a　very　genteel　spirit；　who　made　a　very　low　bow　to

Minos；　and　then　threw　himself　into　an　erect　attitude；　and

imitated　the　motion　of　taking　snuff　with　his　right　hand。　　Minos

asked　him　what　he　had　to　say　for　himself。　　He　answered；　he　would

dance　a　minuet　with　any　spirit　in　Elysium：　　that　he　could

likewise　perform　all　his　other　exercises　very　well；　and　hoped　he

had　in　his　life　deserved　the　character　of　a　perfect　fine

gentleman。　　Minos　replied　it　would　be　great　pity　to　rob　the　world

of　so　fine　a　gentleman；　and　therefore　desired　him　to　take　the

other　trip。　　The　beau　bowed；　thanked　the　judge；　and　said　he

desired　no　better。



Several　spirits　expressed　much　astonishment　at　this　his

satisfaction；　but　we　were　afterwards　informed　he　had　not　taken

the　emetic　above　mentioned。



A　miserable　old　spirit　now　crawled　forwards；　whose　face　I　thought

I　had　formerly　seen　near　Westminster　Abbey。　　He　entertained　Minos

with　a　long　harangue　of　what　he　had　done　when　in　the　HOUSE；　and

then　proceeded　to　inform　him　how　much　he　was　worth；　without

attempting　to　produce　a　single　instance　of　any　one　good　action。　

Minos　stopped　the　career　of　his　discourse；　and　acquainted　him　he

must　take　a　trip　back　again。



〃What！　to　S　house？〃　said　the　spirit　in　an　ecstasy；　but　the

judge；　without　making　him　any　answer；　turned　to　another；　who　with

a　very　solemn　air　and　great　dignity；　acquainted　him　he　was　a

duke。　　〃To　the　right…about；　Mr。　Duke；〃　cried　Minos；　〃you　are

infinitely　too　great　a　man　for　Elysium；〃　and　then；　giving　him　a

kick　on　the　bch；　he　addressed　himself　to　a　spirit　who；　with

fear　and　trembling；　begged　he　might　not　go　to　the　bottomless　pit：

he　said　he　hoped　Minos　would　consider　that；　though　he　had　gone

astray；　he　had　suffered　for　itthat　it　was　necessity　which　drove

him　to　the　robbery　of　eighteenpence；　which　he　had　committed；　and

for　which　he　was　hangedthat　he　had　done　some　good　actions　in

his　lifethat　he　had　supported　an　aged　parent　with　his　labor

that　he　had　been　a　very　tender　husband　and　a　kind　fatherand

that　he　had　ruined　himself　by　being　bail　for　his　friend。　　At

which　words　the　gate　opened；　and　Minos　bade　him　enter；　giving　him

a　slap　on　the　back　as　he　passed　by　him。　　A　great　number　of

spirits　now　came　forwards；　who　all　declared　they　had　the　same

claim；　and　that　the　captain　should　speak　for　them。　　He　acquainted

the　judge　that　they　had　been　all　slain　in　the　service　of　their

country。　　Minos　was　going　to　admit　them；　but　had　the　curiosity　to

ask　who　had　been　the　invader；　in　order；　as　he　said；　to　prepare

the　back　gate　for　him。　　The　captain　answered　they　had　been　the

invaders　themselvesthat　they　had　entered　the　enemy's　country；

and　burned　and　plundered　several　cities。　　〃And　for　what　reason？〃

said　Minos。　　〃By　the　command　of　him　who　paid　us；〃　said　the

captain；　〃that　is　the　reason　of　a　soldier。　　We　are　to　execute

whatever　we　are　commanded；　or　we　should　be　a　disgrace　to　the

army；　and　very　little　deserve　our　pay。〃　　〃You　are　brave　fellows

indeed；〃　said　Minos；　〃but　be　pleased　to　face　about；　and　obey　my

command　for　once；　in　returning　back　to　the　other　world：　　for　what

should　such　fellows　as　you　do　where　there　are　no　cities　to　be

burned；　nor　people　to　be　destroyed？　But　let　me　advise　you　to　have

a　stricter　regard　to　truth　for　the　future；　and　not　call　the

depopulating　other　countries　the　service　of　your　own。〃　　The

captain　answered；　in　a　rage；　〃Dn　me！　do　you　give　me　the　lie？〃

and　was　going　to　take　Minos　by　the　nose　had　not　his　guards

prevented　him；　and　immediately　turned　him　and　all　his　followers

back　the　same　road　they　came。



Four　spirits　informed　the　judge　that　they　had　been　starved　to

death　through　povertybeing　the　father；　mother；　and　two

children；　that　they　had　been　honest　and　as　industrious　as

possible；　till　sickness　had　prevented　the　man　from　labor。　　〃All

that　is　very　true；〃　cried　a　grave　spirit　who　stood　by。　　〃I　know

the　fact；　for　these　poor　people　were　under　my　cure。〃　　〃You　was；　I

suppose；　the　parson　of　the　parish；〃　cries　Minos；　〃I　hope　you　had

a　good　living；　sir。〃　　〃That　was　but　a　small　one；〃　replied　the

spirit；　〃but　I　had　another　a　little　better。〃〃Very　well；〃　said

Minos；　〃let　the　poor　people　pass。〃　At　which　the　parson　was

stepping　forwards　with　a　stately　gait　before　them；　but　Minos

caught　hold　of　him　and　pulled　him　back；　saying；　〃Not　so　fast；

doctoryou　must　take　one　step　more　into　the　other　world　first；

for　no　man　enters　that　gate　without　charity。〃　　A　very　stately

figure　now　presented　himself；　and；　informing　Minos　he　was　a

patriot；　began　a　very　florid　harangue　on　public　virtue　and　the

liberties　of　his　country。　　Upon　which　Minos　showed　him　the　utmost

respect；　and　ordered　the　gate　to　be　opened。　　The　patriot　was　not

contented　with　this　applause；　he　said　he　had　behaved　as　well　in

place　as　he　had　done　in　the　opposition；　and　that；　though　he　was

now　obliged　to　embrace　the　court　measures；　yet　he　had　behaved

very　honestly　to　his　friends；　and　brought　as　many　in　as　was

possible。　　〃Hold　a　moment；〃　says　Minos：　　〃on　second

consideration；　Mr。　Patriot；　I　think　a　man　of　your　great　virtue

and　abilities　will　be　so　much　missed　by　your　country；　that；　if　I

might　advise　you；　you　should　take　a　journey　back　again。　　I　am

sure　you　will　not　decline　it；　for　I　am　certain　you　will；　with

great　readiness；　sacrifice　your　own　happiness　to　the　public

good。〃　　The　patriot　smiled；　and　told　Minos　he　believed　he　was　in

jest；　and　was　offering　to　enter　the　gate；　but　the　judge　laid　fast

hold　of　him　and　insisted　on　his　return；　which　the　patriot　still

declining；　he　at　last　ordered　his　guards　to　seize　him　and　conduct

him　back。



A　spirit　now　advanced；　and　the　gate　was　immediately　thrown　open

to　him　before　he　had　spoken　a　word。　　I　heard　some　whisper；　〃That

is　our　last　lord　mayor。〃



It　now　came　to　our　company's　turn。　　The　fair　spirit　which　I

mentioned　with　so　much　applause　in　the　beginning　of　my　journey

passed　through　very　easily；　but　the　grave　lady　was　rejected　on

her　first　appearance；　Minos　declaring　there　was　not　a　single

prude　in　Elysium。



The　judge　then　addressed　himself　to　me；　who　little　expected　to

pass　this　fiery　trial。　　I　confessed　I　had　indulged　myself　very

freely　with　wine　and　women　in　my　youth；　but　had　never　done　an

injury　to　any　man　living；　nor　avoided　an　opportunity　of　doing

good；　that　I　pretended　to　very　little　virtue　more　than　general

philanthrophy　and　private　friendship。　　I　was　proceeding；　when

Minos　bade　me　enter　the　gate；　and　not　indulge　myself　with

trumpeting　forth　my　virtues。　　I　accordingly　passed　forward　with

my　lovely　companion；　and；　embracing　her　with　vast　eagerness；　but

spiritual　innocence；　she　returned　my　embrace　in　the　same　manner；

and　we　both　congratulated　ourselves　on　our　arrival　in　this　happy

region；　whose　beauty　no　painting　of　the　imagination　can　describe。





CHAPTER　VIII



The　adventures　which　the　author　met　on　his　first　entrance　into

Elysium。



We　pursued　our　way　through　a　delicious　grove　of　orange…trees；

where　I　saw　infinite　numbers　of　spirits；　every　one　of　whom　I

knew；　and　was　known　by　them　（for　spirits　here　know　one　another　by

intuition）。　　I　presently　met　a　little　daughter　whom　I　had　lost

several　years　before。　　Good　gods！　what　words　can　describe　the

raptures；　the　melting　passionate　tenderness；　with　which　we　kissed

each　other；　continuing　in　our　embrace；　with　the　most　ecstatic

joy；　a　space　which；　if　time　had　been　measured　here　as　on　earth；

could　not　be　less　than　half　a　year。



The　first　spirit　with　whom　I　entered　into　discourse　was　the

famous　Leonidas　of　Sparta。　　I　acquainted　him　with　the　honors

which　had　been　done　him　by　a　celebrated　poet　of　our　nation；　to

which　he　answered　he　was　very　much　obliged　to　him。　　We　were

presently　afterwards　entertained　with　the　most　delicious　voice　I

had　ever　heard；　accompanied　by　a　violin；　equal　to　Signior

Piantinida。　　I　presently　discovered　the　musician　and　songster　to

be　Orpheus　and　Sappho。



Old　Homer　was　present　at　this　concert　（if　I　may　so　call　it）；　and

Madam　Dacier　sat　in　his　lap。　　He　asked　much　after　Mr。　Pope；　and

said　he　was　very　desirous　of　seeing　him；　for　that　he　had　read　his

Iliad　in　his　translation　with　almost　as　much　delight　as　he

believed　he　had　given　others　in　the　original。　　I　had　the

curiosity　to　inquire　whether　he　had　really　writ　that　poem　in

detached　pieces；　and　sung　it　about　as　ballads　all　over　Greece；

according　to　the　report　which　went　of　him。　　He　smiled　at　my

question；　and　asked　me　whether　there　appeared　any　connection　in

the　poem；　for　if　there　did　he　thought　I　might　answer　myself。　　I

then　importuned　him　to　acquaint　me　in　which　of　the　cities　which

contended　for　the　honor　of　his　birth　he　was　really　born？　　To

which　he　answered；　〃Upon　my　soul　I　can't　tell。〃



Virgil　then　came　up　to　me；　with　Mr。　Addison　under　his　arm。　

〃Well；　sir；〃　said　he；　〃how　many　translations　have　these　few　last

years　produced　of　my　Aeneid？〃　　I　told　him　I　believed　several；　but

I　could　not　possibly　remember；　for　that　I　had　never　read　any　but

Dr。　Trapp's。　　〃Ay；〃　said　he；　〃that　is　a　curious　piece　indeed！〃　　I

then　acquainted　him　with　the　discovery　made　by　Mr。　Warburton　of

the　Elusinian　mysteries　couched　in　his　sixth　book。　　〃What

mysteries？〃　said　Mr。　Addison。　　〃The　Elusinian；〃　answered　Virgil；

〃which　I　have　disclosed　in　my　sixth　book。〃　　〃How！〃　replied

Addison。　　〃You　never　mentioned　a　word　of　any　such　mysteries　to　me

in　all　our　acquaintance。〃　　〃I　thought　it　was　unnecessary；〃　cried

the　other；　〃to　a　man　of　your　infinite　learning：　　besides；　you

always　told　me　you　perfectly　understood　my　meaning。〃　　Upon　this　I

thought　the　critic　looked　a　little　out　of　countenance；　and　turned

aside　to　a　very　merry　spirit；　one　Dick　Steele；　who　embraced　him；

and　told　him　he　had　been　the　greatest　man　upon　earth；　that　he

readily　resigned　up　all　the　merit　of　his　own　works　t