initials only-第33部分

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might　be　sadder　for　her　still。　　Leave　it　where　it　is　and　begin　about　yourself。　　Write　a　good　deal　about　yourself；　so　that　she　will　see　that　you　are　not　worried　and　that　all　is　well　with　us　here。　　Cannot　you　do　that　without　assistance？　　Surely　you　can　tell　her　about　that　last　piece　of　embroidery　you　showed　me。　　She　will　be　glad　to　hear　…　why；　Doris！〃

〃　Oh；　Mr。　Brotherson；〃　the　poor　child　burst　out；　〃you　must　let　me　cry！　　I'm　so　glad　to　see　you　better　and　interested　in　all　sorts　of　things。　　These　are　not　tears　of　grief。　　I　…　I　…　but　I'm　forgetting　what　the　doctor　told　me。　　You　are　growing　excited；　and　I　was　to　see　that　you　were　calm；　always　calm。　　I　will　take　my　desk　away。　　I　will　write　the　rest　in　the　other　room；　while　you　look　at　the　magazines。〃

〃　But　bring　your　letter　back　for　me　to　seal。　　I　want　to　see　it　in　its　envelope。　　Oh；　Doris；　you　are　a　good　little　girl！〃

She　shook　her　head；　and　hastened　to　hide　herself　from　him　in　the　other　room；　and　it　was　a　long　time　before　she　came　back　with　the　letter　folded　and　in　its　envelope。　　When　she　did；　her　face　was　composed　and　her　manner　natural。　　She　had　quite　made　up　her　mind　what　her　duty　was　and　how　she　was　going　to　perform　it。

〃Here　is　the　letter；〃　said　she；　laying　it　in　his　outstretched　hand。　Then　she　turned　her　back。　　She　knew；　with　a　woman's　unerring　instinct　why　he　wished　to　handle　it　before　it　went。　　She　felt　that　kiss　he　folded　away　in　it；　in　every　fibre　of　her　aroused　and　sympathetic　heart；　but　the　hardest　part　of　the　ordeal　was　over　and　her　eyes　beamed　softly　when　she　turned　again　to　take　it　from　his　hand　and　affix　the　stamp。

〃You　will　mail　it　yourself？〃　he　asked。　　〃I　should　like　to　have　you　put　it　into　the　box　with　your　own　hand。〃

〃I　will　put　it　in　to…night；　after　supper；〃　she　promised　him。

His　smile　of　contentment　assured　her　that　this　trial　of　her　courage　and　self…control　was　not　without　one　blessed　result。　　He　would　rest　for　several　days　in　the　pleasure　of　what　he　had　done　or　thought　he　had　done。　　She　need　not　cringe　before　that　image　of　Dread　for　two；　three　days　at　least。　　Meanwhile；　he　would　grow　strong　in　body；　and　she；　perhaps；　in　spirit。　　Only　one　precaution　she　must　take。　　No　hint　of　Mr。　Challoner's　presence　in　town　must　reach　him。　　He　must　be　guarded　from　a　knowledge　of　that　fact　as　certainly　as　from　the　more　serious　one　which　lay　behind　it。



XXVIII

I　HOPE　NEVER　TO　SEE　THAT　MAN


That　this　would　be　a　difficult　thing　to　do；　Doris　was　soon　to　realise。　　Mr。　Challoner　continued　to　pass　the　house　twice　a　day　and　the　time　finally　came　when　he　ventured　up　the　walk。

Doris　was　in　the　window　and　saw　him　coming。　　She　slipped　softly　out　and　intercepted　him　before　he　had　stepped　upon　the　porch。　　She　had　caught　up　her　hat　as　she　passed　through　the　hall；　and　was　fitting　it　to　her　head　as　he　looked　up　and　saw　her。

〃Miss　Scott？〃　he　asked。

〃Yes；　Mr。　Challoner。〃

〃You　know　me？〃　he　went　on；　one　foot　on　the　step　and　one　still　on　the　walk。

Before　replying　she　closed　the　door　behind　her。　　Then　as　she　noted　his　surprise　she　carefully　explained：

〃Mr。　Brotherson；　our　boarder；　is　just　recovering　from　typhoid。　　He　is　still　weak　and　acutely　susceptible　to　the　least　noise。　　I　was　afraid　that　our　voices　might　disturb　him。　　Do　you　mind　walking　a　little　way　up　the　road？　　That　is；　if　your　visit　was　intended　for　me。〃

Her　flush；　the　beauty　which　must　have　struck　ever　him；　but　more　than　all　else　her　youth；　seemed　to　reconcile　him　to　this　unconventional　request。　　Bowing；　he　took　his　foot　from　the　step；　saying；　as　she　joined　him：

〃　Yes；　you　are　the　one　I　wanted　to　see；　that　is；　to…day。　　Later；　I　hope　to　have　the　privilege　of　a　conversation　with　Mr。　Brotherson。〃

She　gave　him　one　quick　look；　trembling　so　that　he　offered　her　his　arm　with　a　fatherly　air。

〃I　see　that　you　understand　my　errand　here；〃　he　proceeded；　with　a　grave　smile；　meant　as　she　knew　for　her　encouragement。　　〃I　am　glad；　because　we　can　go　at　once　to　the　point。　　Miss　Scott；〃　he　continued　in　a　voice　from　which　he　no　longer　strove　to　keep　back　the　evidences　of　deep　feeling；　〃I　have　the　strongest　interest　in　your　patient　that　one　man　can　have　in　another；　where　there　is　no　personal　acquaintanceship。　　You　who　have　every　reason　to　understand　my　reasons　for　this；　will　accept　the　statement；　I　hope；　as　frankly　as　it　is　made。〃

She　nodded。　　Her　eyes　were　full　of　tears；　but　she　did　not　hesitate　to　raise　them。　　She　had　the　greatest　desire　to　see　the　face　of　the　man　who　could　speak　like　this　to…day；　and　yet　of　whose　pride　and　sense　of　superiority　his　daughter　had　stood　in　such　awe；　that　she　had　laid　a　seal　upon　the　impulses　of　her　heart；　and　imposed　such　tasks　and　weary　waiting　upon　her　lover。　　Doris　forgot；　in　meeting　his　softened　glance　and　tender；　almost　wistful；　expression；　the　changes　which　can　be　made　by　a　great　grief；　and　only　wondered　why　her　sweet　benefactress　had　not　taken　him　into　her　confidence　and　thus；　possibly；　averted　the　doom　which　Doris　felt　had　in　some　way　grown　out　of　this　secrecy。

〃　Why　should　she　have　feared　the　disapproval　of　this　man？〃　she　inwardly　queried；　as　she　cast　him　a　confiding　look　which　pleased　him　greatly；　as　his　tone　now　showed。

〃When　I　lost　my　daughter；　I　lost　everything；〃　he　declared；　as　they　walked　slowly　up　the　road。　　〃Nothing　excites　my　interest；　save　that　which　once　excited　hers。　　I　am　told　that　the　deepest　interest　of　her　life　lay　here。　　I　am　also　told　that　it　was　an　interest　quite　worthy　of　her。　　I　expect　to　find　it　so。　　I　hope　with　all　my　heart　to　find　it　so；　and　that　is　why　I　have　come　to　this　town　and　expect　to　linger　till　Mr。　Brotherson　has　recovered　sufficiently　to　see　me。　I　hope　that　this　will　be　agreeable　to　him。　　I　hope　that　I　am　not　presuming　too　much　in　cherishing　these　expectations。

Doris　turned　her　candid　eyes　upon　him。

〃I　cannot　tell；　I　do　not　know；〃　said　she。　　〃Nobody　knows；　not　even　the　doctor；　what　effect　the　news　we　so　dread　to　give　him　will　have　upon　Mr。　Brotherson。　　You　will　have　to　wait　…　we　all　shall　have　to　wait　the　results　of　that　revelation。　　It　cannot　be　kept　from　him　much　longer。　　When　I　return；　I　shall　shrink　from　his　first　look；　in　the　fear　of　seeing　it　betray　this　dreadful　knowledge。　　Yet　I　have　a　faithful　woman　there　to　keep　every　one　out　of　his　room。〃

〃You　have　had　much　to　carry　for　one　so　young；〃　was　Mr。　Challoner's　sympathetic　remark。　　〃You　must　let　me　help　you　when　that　awful　moment　comes。　　I　am　at　the　hotel　and　shall　stay　there　till　Mr。　Brotherson　is　pronounced　quite　well。　　I　have　no　other　duty　now　in　life　but　to　sustain　him　through　his　trouble　and　then；　with　what　aid　he　can　give；　search　out　and　find　the　cause　of　my　daughter's　death　which　I　will　never　admit　without　the　fullest　proof；　to　have　been　one　of　suicide。〃

Doris　trembled。

〃It　was　not　suicide；〃　she　declared；　vehemently。　　〃I　have　always　felt　sure　that　it　was　not；　but　to…day　I　KNOW。〃

Her　hand　fell　clenched　on　her　breast　and　her　eyes　gleamed　strangely。　Mr。　Challoner　was　himself　greatly　startled。　　What　had　happened　　…　what　could　have　happened　since　yesterday　that　she　should　emphasise　that　now？

〃I've　not　told　any　one；〃　she　went　on；　as　he　stopped　short　in　the　road；　in　his　anxiety　to　understand　her。　　〃But　I　will　tell　you。　Only；　not　here；　not　with　all　these　people　driving　past；　most　of　whom　know　me。　　Come　to　the　house　later　…　this　evening；　after　Mr。　Brotherson's　room　is　closed　for　the　night。　　I　have　a　little　sitting…room　on　the　other　side　of　the　hall　where　we　can　talk　without　being　heard。　　Would　you　object　to　doing　that？　　Am　I　asking　too　much　of　you？〃

〃No；　not　at　all；〃　he　assured　her。〃　　Expect　me　at　eight。　　Will　that　be　too　early？〃

〃No；　no。　　Oh；　how　those　people　stared！　　Let　us　hasten　back　or　they　may　connect　your　name　with　what　we　want　kept　secret。〃

He　smiled　at　her　fears；　but　gave　in　to　her　humour；　he　would　see　her　soon　again　and　possibly　learn　something　which　would　amply　repay　him；　both　for　his　trouble　and　his　patience。

But　when　evening　came　and　she　turned　to　face　him　in　that　little　sitting…room　where　he　had　quietly　followed　her；　he　was　conscious　of　a　change　in　her　manner　which　forbade　these　high　hopes。　　The　gleam　was　gone　from　her　eyes；　the　tremulous　eagerness　from　her　mobile　and　sensitive　mouth。　　She　had　been　thinking　in　the　hours　which　had　passed；　and　had　lost　the　confidence　of　that　one　impetuous　moment。　Her　greeting　betrayed　embarrassment　and　she　hesitated　painfully　before　she　spoke。

〃I　don't　know　what　you　will　think　of　me；〃　she　ventured　at　last；　motioning　to　a　chair　but　not　sitting　herself。　　〃You　have　had　time　to　think　over　what　I　said　and　probably　expect　something　real；　…　some　…　thing　you　could　tell　people。　　But　it　isn't　like　that。　It's　a　feeling　…　a　belief。　　I'm　so　sure　…〃

〃Sure　of　what；　Miss　Scott？〃

She　gave　a　glance　at　the　door　before　stepping　up　nearer。　　He　had　not　taken　the　chair　she　preferred。

〃Sure　that　I　have　seen　the　face　of　the　man　who　　murdered　her。　　It　was　in　a　dream；〃　she　whisperingly　completed；　her　great　eyes　misty　with　awe。

〃A　dream；　Miss　Scott？〃　　He　tried　to　hide　his　disappointment。

〃Yes；　I　knew　that　it　would　sound　foolish　to　you；　it　sounds　foolish　to　me。　　But　listen；　sir。　　Listen　to　what　I　have　to　tell　and　then　you　can　judge。　　I　was　　very　much　agitated　yesterday。　　I　had　to　write　a　letter　at　Mr。　Brotherson's　dictation　…　a　letter　to　　her。　You　can　understand　my　horror　and　the　effort　I　made　to　hide　my　emotion。　　I　was　quite　unnerved。　　I　could　not　sleep　till　morning；　and　then　…　and　then　…　I　saw　…　I　hope　I　can　describe　it。〃

Grasping　at　a　near…by　chair；　she　leaned　on　it　for　support；　closing　her　eyes　to　all　but　that　inner　vision。　　A　breathless　moment　followed；　then　she　murmured　in　strained　tnonotonous　tones：

〃I　see　it　again　…　just　as　I　saw　it　in　the　early　morning　…　but　even　more　plainly；　if　that　is　possible。　　A　hall　…　（I　should　call　it　a　hall；　though　I　don't　remember　seeing　any　place　like　it　before）；　with　a　little　staircase　at　the　side；　up　which　there　comes　a　man；　who　stops　just　at　the　top　and　looks　intently　my　way。　　There　is　fierceness　in　his　face　…　a　look　which　means　no　good　to　anybody　　…　and　as　his　hand　goes　to　his　overcoat　pocket；　drawing　out　something　which　I　cannot　describe；　but　which　he　handles　as　if　it　were　a　pistol；　I　feel　a　horrible　fear；　and　…　and　…〃　　The　child　was　staggering；　and　the　hand　which